[{"data":1,"prerenderedAt":-1},["ShallowReactive",2],{"$f34djcrv3ktfx3":3,"$f10b3rz2z388kj":17,"$f10clxyz1aekxw":28},{"id":4,"author_id":5,"slug":6,"is_featured":7,"title":8,"content":9,"content_overview":10,"published_at":11,"seo_title":8,"seo_description":12,"image":13,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":15,"updated_at":16},77,"9cdbdd6d-4900-4646-a012-d3e67a5ee788","lyndseys-volunteer-befriender-story",0,"Lyndsey's volunteer befriender story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>A life-changing befriending scheme delivered by Aberlour Children’s Charity is helping ease the pressure on new mums. Here, Lyndsey, a \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Fbumps\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">volunteer befriender in Lothian\u003C\u002Fa>, explains what’s involved and why it matters\u003C\u002Fstrong>. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As my children grew older and began to leave home I had more time on my hands and was looking for a new challenge.  I was interested in volunteering as it would allow me to do something positive but would give me more flexibility than going back to work.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"I liked the idea of doing something with children, which led me to Aberlour. The befriending service really appealed to me as I remember very clearly how long days can feel at home with a little baby. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"Before you become a befriender there is a period of training, I think it was an evening a week for seven weeks. I really enjoyed the training, it was actually very interesting and taught me valuable listening skills. \u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"The time commitment to being a befriender is an afternoon a week. It is rarely more than three hours including travelling. In addition you have occasional ‘supervision meetings’ with your coordinator, which are actually very relaxed - a coffee and a catch up. The team at Aberlour are amazing. They are incredibly supportive and helpful. I love being part of it.\u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"I’ve been a befriender for nearly three years now and have been matched with four mums over that time. The service is provided until the baby’s first birthday. \u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"What we do is very much shaped by the mum. Often we just sit on the floor playing with the baby and having a chat. That might not sound like much but sometimes having a bit of company and someone to give you a wee lift can make a bad day much better. I’ve also lent a hand rocking the baby whilst mums have a haircut or go to the dentist. I’ve kept a mum company whilst she went to a Book Bugs session at her local library because she was nervous about going along on her own.\u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"Sometimes it can bring back lovely memories of my boys when they were babies. Things I had forgotten. \u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"Some of the mums we work with have mental health issues from before their pregnancy. Some are struggling with the pressure of being a new mum. The most important thing is that we are not there to judge or advise or fix things. We are there to provide a sympathetic ear. You don’t need any special qualifications, just a willingness to listen and support. \u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"That first year can be a very tough time for new mums. Everyone telling them that it should be a happy time can make it even harder to talk about it if they are feeling anxious or depressed. Some mums just need some encouragement to get out and about.\u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"It can be easy to become isolated with a new baby. Sometimes they have no one to talk to. Sometimes they have family but don’t want to be judged, or appear as if they are being critical as if the support they are getting from their family is not enough. \u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"They know they can pour their hearts out to us, tell us how they really feel, because we’re apart from their family and their day to day lives. \u003Cbr>It has been nice to feel a little challenged while being part of a team, to do something unconnected to my family and home.\u003Cbr>\u003Cbr>\"I feel lucky to have found a place in the service and find it incredibly satisfying. It’s only a few hours each week but feels like time really well spent. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"The volunteers are just trying to make what can be a tough time a little easier. That feels like a good thing to do, a worthwhile thing.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Fvolunteer\u002Fmother-baby-befrienders-wanted\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Find out more about becoming a volunteer mother and baby befriender\u003C\u002Fa> with Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>",null,"2026-05-06T00:00:00.000000Z","Read all about Lyndsey's experience as a Mother and Baby volunteer befriender with Aberlour Children's Charity.","media\u002F01KQYXRBMSZ3VGFY7W7TSJ1MBG.jpg",1,"2026-05-06T15:15:58.000000Z","2026-05-06T15:16:44.000000Z",{"id":18,"blog_author_id":5,"blog_category_id":19,"is_featured":20,"title":21,"slug":22,"content":23,"content_overview":10,"published_at":24,"seo_title":21,"seo_description":25,"image":26,"created_at":27,"updated_at":27},"01m45vtvk0pdb1y7c1cqv76edp","1",false,"Panic and Promises Won't End Child Poverty","panic-and-promises-wont-end-child-poverty","\u003Cp>We live in a world that seems to spin faster every day, where all the dials are turned to 11 all the time.  \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The headlines crash from one calamity to another as our political leaders rush to promise emergency action while their opponents demand even more urgency. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It is noisy, tiring and a few hours later, when the news cycle spins to another red alert, the last one, whatever it was, is most often forgotten. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For years now, child poverty in Scotland has been routinely described as a national emergency demanding emergency action. It is and it does but, with more than one in five children still growing up in poverty in Scotland today, is it time to ask if the language of emergency and crisis is helping?  \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Perhaps it only encourages more haste but less speed, a birling carousel of taskforces and committees, policy papers and special reports, but too little measured and impactful action? Are we even checking if the blizzard of promises and commitments is being delivered before starting the snow machine again? \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What if the endless planning and process is actually slowing us down? What if somehow all the talk is delaying implementation of practical, tested, and effective measures to improve the lives and secure the life chances of the 210,000 children growing up poor in one of the wealthiest countries in the world? \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Because we already know what works. We have known for years.  \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Of course, there are no magic bullets, no simple solutions to the complex social issues that have blighted our poorest communities for decades. Child poverty, like Scotland’s drugs crisis, another national emergency, is embedded in longstanding economic trends that have stripped far too many of our neighbourhoods of jobs and hope. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Those trends will not be reversed overnight but, in the meantime, we should not let perfect be the enemy of good. As Challenge Poverty Week begins today, the biggest challenge is to see the wood not the trees, to recognise and appreciate what is already working and build on it. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There are things that we know ease the impact of poverty on young lives; that have been trialled, tested and measured; that inch their families from peril to safety; that give them new strength, confidence and a path to a more secure future. So why not have more of them? \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>These are services that our charity and others are delivering every day, hand in glove with our partners in social work, health care and education. These are services delivering real, measurable success, making children safer, healthier and happier today and improving their chances tomorrow. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Intensive family support, for example. The clue is in the name. It is the opposite of easy. Any family’s journey back from the very edge of crisis is one of hard yards and no shortcuts. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our teams arrive to work, shoulder to shoulder, with families on the point of collapse, with children often on the edge of care. Ensuring those babies and young people are safe is always the priority but, after that, keeping them with their families is the driving force because that, all research suggests, is the best way to stabilise childhoods and secure futures. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Intensive family support means doing whatever it takes to keep children safe and families together. It can rebuild broken relationships; improve parents’ confidence in themselves; create new connections in communities; and help build firmer financial foundations with advice on welfare rights, maximising incomes and problem debt. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Any investment in intensive family support and other specialist services, for pregnant women and new mums, for example, is more than returned in thriving families, stronger communities and money saved. Resource is better spent on intensive support keeping families safely together, than managing their separation through a lifetime of crisis-led state intervention.  \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our two Mother and Child Recovery Houses, in Falkirk and Dundee, for example, offer recovery spaces for pregnant and new mums with a history of substance use, allowing them to recover while staying safely with their babies. This helps keep families together and children at home, improves their futures and saves millions of pounds in avoided care costs. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This is true child protection and the big question is not whether we can afford to roll out these services across Scotland but if we can afford not to?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Justina Murray \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cbr>\u003Cstrong>Chief executive of Aberlour Children’s Charity \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>This article was written for the Daily Record and published on Monday 5th October 2026.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>","2026-10-05T00:00:00.000000Z","Aberlour Children's Charity CEO, Justina Murray, explains what must be done to end child poverty in Scotland. We know what works and we've known for years. ","media\u002FRS873_0E5A9135.jpg","2026-10-05T11:05:26.000000Z",[29,40,49,59,68,78,87,97,105,113,119,128,138,146,153,161,168,175,182,190,199,208,217,227,235,244,252,261,270,279,288,297,307,315,324,332,340,349,357,366,374,382,391,401,410,419,428,437,445,453,462,471,479,488,498,507,515,524,534,544,553,561,570,578,587,596,605,614,623,633,641,648,655],{"id":30,"author_id":5,"slug":31,"is_featured":7,"title":32,"content":33,"content_overview":10,"published_at":34,"seo_title":32,"seo_description":35,"image":36,"story_type_id":37,"created_at":38,"updated_at":39},76,"stephens-urgent-assistance-fund-story","Stephen's Urgent Assistance Fund Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cem>At Aberlour Children’s Charity we rush emergency payments to families on the brink. Here, Stephen, not his real name, hails the swift support of our \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fget-help\u002Furgent-assistance-fund\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Urgent Assistance Fund\u003C\u002Fa> for easing the pressure at a time of crisis for his family.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It might not seem a lot of money, just £300, but when you don’t have it, can’t get it, and really need it, it might as well be a million.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"Our washing machine broke down in November. We use it all the time and it just gave up the ghost. We had no idea what to do. We have no family or friends to ask for help. No one at all. Thankfully, a neighbour allowed us to use their machine for a day or two but we’re a long way from a laundrette and couldn’t afford buses never mind taxis. We were at our wits’ end. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"Aberlour have been helping our family for a year or so now and I just mentioned the washing machine was broken. I wasn’t expecting them to help but couldn’t have been more wrong. They were terrific, explaining there were emergency grants, and helping us apply.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"We had the money within days and a new machine the day after that. We could even afford a bigger machine, a nine kilo load instead of five, and that made such a difference too. We could not have been more grateful. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"My son’s seven and, with my own health problems making things harder, had been struggling a little at school. Aberlour come and take him out for the day, do things with him. He looks forward to it and he’s a lot more settled now. They are such good people, easy to talk to, helpful, practical, and, when it came to the crunch, were right there beside us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"A broken washing machine might not sound like the end of the world but it can feel like it. When money is so tight and there are so many things to worry about, it can just take one small thing to bring everything down on top of you. We didn’t have the money for a new one or any idea how we were going to manage without it. The stress just starts building and building. You can feel it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>\"The money from Aberlour was definitely urgent assistance but it felt like more. It felt like a lifesaver.”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>","2026-02-11T00:00:00.000000Z","At Aberlour Children’s Charity we rush emergency payments to families on the brink. Stephen hails the swift support of our Urgent Assistance Fund for helping.","media\u002F01KH6MHN7363GV1AVKHCCNZXM2.jpg",5,"2026-02-11T15:19:04.000000Z","2026-02-11T15:24:37.000000Z",{"id":41,"author_id":5,"slug":42,"is_featured":7,"title":43,"content":44,"content_overview":10,"published_at":45,"seo_title":43,"seo_description":46,"image":47,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":48,"updated_at":48},71,"jens-volunteer-befriender-story","Jen's Volunteer Befriender Story","\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>‘It might be a swim, a chat or a walk in the park’\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\"It’s all about the mums, what they want, what they think might help. There was one who really wanted to go swimming because that was something she enjoyed before her baby arrived.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"So I would bob around in the baby pool with the little one while her mum did some lengths.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"I’ve been a perinatal befriender since 2019, helping new mums who have been referred to Aberlour because they might need some extra support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"I’ll do whatever is going to help make things a little easier for them. I’m there to help, to allow her to take a breath and decide for herself how things can work.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"It’s about listening, not judging and giving women space to talk about whatever is on their mind.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"I have always had an interest in the welfare of children and enjoy being around babies and children. When I’m not volunteering, I work mainly in primary schools, introducing children to mindfulness to help with their emotional and mental wellbeing. It is so important to support children in this way.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"It’s a two-way thing and I get so much from the mums I meet. The training of volunteers is terrific. It is a privilege to be alongside women and their little ones.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"We are told that we are not there to “fix things” but to listen, provide a bit of space for the mums to offload and then work out what they need to do for themselves. We are often working with quite vulnerable women and building trust is important but so is the relationship between the befrienders and our co-ordinator. It’s all built on trust, good training and knowing support is there if needed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"It’s so important to get the early years right when the babies are tiny, and that ripples right through into adulthood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\"It baffles me why there isn’t more investment in early childhood. It seems like such a no-brainer when children are our future.\"\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>\u003Cstrong>Jen La Trobe, Volunteer Perinatal Befriender\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Find out more about becoming an \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Abelour Perinatal Befriender\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>","2025-06-02T00:00:00.000000Z","Jen has been an Aberlour Volunteer Perinatal Befriender since 2019. Find out more about her volunteering journey.","media\u002F01JWRKRTPN89TV0KMZBSSP76QC.jpg","2025-06-02T15:22:12.000000Z",{"id":50,"author_id":5,"slug":51,"is_featured":7,"title":52,"content":53,"content_overview":10,"published_at":54,"seo_title":52,"seo_description":55,"image":56,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":58,"updated_at":58},75,"danielles-story","Danielle's Story","\u003Cp>I was having a difficult time at school and at home. I wasn’t happy and couldn’t imagine it getting better.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Eventually, it was one of my teachers who noticed something was going on and that’s when Aberlour started helping me, offering support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My relationship with my mum was really difficult and causing a lot of problems in my family and \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Fglasgow-family-support-service\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa> helped with that. We were constantly at each other’s throats, arguing all the time and were just trapped in a cycle of fighting and shouting.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our relationship is so much better now and that just wouldn’t have happened without my support workers. Gradually, I started to see where my mum was coming from, the other point of view. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They never took sides though, just helped us see there were valid points on both sides. My supporter worker would never suggest I was wrong to feel the way I did. They helped give me a little space, time to breathe away from my mum.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They would visit, or take me for something to eat or a wee drive, just a change of scene, making sure I was okay. They would mostly just talk about what was going on with me, how things were. They would talk to my mum and just help us talk to see the other side and work things out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They let me talk and to have someone actually listening to me made the difference. It felt like someone was in my corner. \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour encouraged me to think about where I was going and how to get there, kind of push me along. It felt like a new start.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Danielle*\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Name changed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This article was written as part of the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fassets\u002Fpdf\u002Fwe-are-family-150th-celebration.pdf\">'We are family' special edition supplement with the Sunday Post\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>","2025-05-18T00:00:00.000000Z","Danielle shares the support she has received from Aberlour Children's Charity's Glasgow family support team.","media\u002F01K0YABXEH7NCPF31CNZ7Z47X6.jpg",2,"2025-07-24T13:36:06.000000Z",{"id":60,"author_id":5,"slug":61,"is_featured":7,"title":62,"content":63,"content_overview":10,"published_at":54,"seo_title":62,"seo_description":64,"image":65,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":66,"updated_at":67},74,"roisin-and-ashleys-story","Roisin and Ashley's Story","\u003Cp>‘My son has a life now. I never thought it would happen’\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It feels like a miracle. Three years after the phone rang, I am seeing things I thought I would never see again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My son Ashley, 21, who has severe learning disabilities, non verbal autism, and epilepsy, was living in a specialist unit in England when I got the call from Aberlour wanting to help us bring him home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The team had already thrown our family a lifeline once before when they offered us respite care when Ashley was in his early teens.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They kept in touch even though they didn’t have to but just because they cared. Then, after all that had happened, they came to our rescue again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I don’t have the words to express how much that meant. The staff are just another level and allowing us to bring Ashley home to Scotland was literally life-changing for all of us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What they do is so important and so badly needed. The services they provide, like respite care, can be the difference between families being able to take a breath or burning out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Slowly, Ashley has been brought out of his shell, out of darkness and into the light. He has a life now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This is a boy who never left his bed for nine years. He never had a life and now he is leading a fulfilling life. I never thought it would happen.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour saved our family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Roisin\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Ashley's Mum\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This article was written as part of the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fassets\u002Fpdf\u002Fwe-are-family-150th-celebration.pdf\">'We are family' special edition supplement with the Sunday Post\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>","Roisin, Ashley's mum, shares the lifechanging support her son has received with Aberlour Children's Charity.","media\u002F01K0VZGNCPS4EGPGPMJVZ8N62T.jpg","2025-07-23T15:47:58.000000Z","2025-07-23T15:48:07.000000Z",{"id":69,"author_id":5,"slug":70,"is_featured":7,"title":71,"content":72,"content_overview":10,"published_at":54,"seo_title":71,"seo_description":73,"image":74,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":76,"updated_at":77},73,"sandra-and-davids-fostering-story","Sandra and David's Fostering Story","\u003Cp>It makes us better parents. It makes us better people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We put a baby monitor in Stephen’s room when he arrived with us just to make sure he was okay.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Some mornings, he would wake up before the rest of us and, on the monitor, we’d hear these strange, rustling sounds.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When we went into his room, his bed would be empty and we’d find him hiding underneath.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What could a three-year-old boy have gone through that could terrify him like that?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He’s just adorable but has issues and can struggle emotionally. He’s very affectionate and bright but his development seems delayed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When he came to us, he was lovely, trying to please with a big smile, but that was a front and, over time, we get hints of what his life might have been like previously.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He doesn’t like anyone even slightly raising their voice, for example, even in fun. He previously had issues sleeping, nightmares.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Families can come in all shapes and forms but home should be a safe place, secure and stable. If you can help a child who needs a home like that, why wouldn’t you?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We get as much out of it as the children. The love we get back, the knowledge that we’re good enough for them to trust us and love us and put their faith in us, is so rewarding.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It makes us better parents. It makes us better people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sandra and David*\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cbr>\u003Cstrong>Foster Parents\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Names changed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This article was written as part of the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fassets\u002Fpdf\u002Fwe-are-family-150th-celebration.pdf\">'We are family' special edition supplement with the Sunday Post\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>","Find out from Aberlour Foster Carer's Sandra and David what it's been like welcoming 3 year old Stephen into their family.","media\u002F01K0VZ4X5CZRXHWNH2Y3W2AGE0.jpg",3,"2025-07-23T15:41:33.000000Z","2025-07-23T15:42:06.000000Z",{"id":79,"author_id":5,"slug":80,"is_featured":7,"title":81,"content":82,"content_overview":10,"published_at":54,"seo_title":83,"seo_description":84,"image":85,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":86,"updated_at":86},72,"alans-story","Alan's Story","\u003Cp>It sounds dramatic but that first night changed my life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It sounds dramatic but is the simple truth. A youth club changed my life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The club is run by Johnny Hendry, a legend in Govan, and it is impossible to overestimate what he has achieved with young people growing up there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>His club had a huge impact on so many of us. It was never just four walls and a roof, it was a safety net, a place where young people could find help and encouragement when they might not have found it elsewhere.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It changed my life and, over the years, there have been hundreds, thousands, like me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I was 16 when I first went in 2008 and mad about karate. I had won a world title in my age group and was hoping to get to Tokyo to defend it but the cost looked prohibitive.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I just remember Johnny being totally engaged as soon as he heard about it, getting sponsorship, publicity, just doing everything he possibly could to help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In the end, I got to Tokyo and retained my title but my respect and gratitude to Johnny and Aberlour goes far beyond that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He helped me in all sorts of ways. I wrote my first CV with the help of the club, for example, and was coached for my first interview there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Johnny was doing it for me but he would do it for every young person that came through the door. He is a force of nature and, when it comes to young people needing help, never stops.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sometimes life can change in an instant and walking into that club changed everything for me and loads of young people like me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Alan Pollock\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cbr>\u003Cstrong>Youth club alumni\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This article was written as part of the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fassets\u002Fpdf\u002Fwe-are-family-150th-celebration.pdf\">'We are family' special edition supplement with the Sunday Post\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>","Alan's story about how Aberlour's youth club saved his life","Alan used to attend Aberlour Children's Charity's youth club in Govan. Here he shares his story on how the youth club saved his life.","media\u002F01K0VYRFD1EG7JC0R48PFQ14BN.jpg","2025-07-23T15:34:46.000000Z",{"id":14,"author_id":19,"slug":88,"is_featured":7,"title":89,"content":90,"content_overview":10,"published_at":91,"seo_title":92,"seo_description":93,"image":94,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":95,"updated_at":96},"waynes-volunteering-story","Wayne’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Wayne decided to become a volunteer as he wants to be a positive male role model for young people and support them to enjoy their childhood. He joined Aberlour in March 2023 supporting our service team in Dundee.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was interested in \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Fvolunteer\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">volunteering\u003C\u002Fa> as I had a rough childhood myself and decided that I wanted to help to support young people and help them enjoy their childhood. I want to be a good role model for children and young people and be someone they can trust and talk to. I feel very passionate about using the experience I have to bring out the very best in young people, no matter who they are, or what they have been through or are going through. Every young person deserves companionship, fun, safety, nourishment, encouragement and to simply be a child\u002Fyoung person.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I think it is very important that young people have male support as it is key to their development. Male role models can provide the young person with a strong leadership model and teach young people the importance of feelings and emotions. It’s important for young people to learn that it is okay to seek support from other people.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Wayne shared what he believes are essential skills and qualities to be a mentor and befriender to children and young people.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I think you need to be a very good listener and be able to communicate with people from all walks of life and backgrounds. You must have the ability to be empathetic and understand the needs of young people. You also need to be approachable as it can be difficult for a young person to engage with other people due to factors such as isolation, trauma, vulnerability or being unsure of who they can trust. You will also need to be resilient as you might be a confidante for the young person and hear distressing things. However, at Aberlour you are never alone as you go through training, and you always have a named volunteer staff member that you can talk to at any time. Most of all, I think it is imperative that you are full of fun and can pull your sleeves up and get stuck in making mud pies or having water fights, to helping a family with respite while you take the young person away swimming or shopping.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Volunteering has given Wayne the opportunity to make a difference in the lives of young people and would encourage others to get involved.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“During my mentoring sessions I listened to and supported a young person through school, spending time with him working on school assignments and homework and listening to things he went through as a child. I was able to be a person he could trust. He didn’t know what he wanted to do when he left school, so I encouraged him to speak with his career advisor and I found out what his interests were out with school. Between us we found a college course that would be suitable for him. Recently my young person told me that he decided to leave school as he had been accepted into the college course he wanted to do. He thanked me for steering him in that direction. It was such a buzz for me as I felt I had made a positive impact on his life. That was a very good day.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I have since been matched with another young person and it’s at an early stage yet – he didn’t trust me at the start as other adults have come and gone in his life. However, I have met him every week without fail and I am hopefully proving to him that I am not going anywhere. Just last week he started to open up to me slightly – I think this is a fantastic step on his part.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I have felt I have made a difference and I know you can too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2024-06-04T00:00:00.000000Z","Wayne’s Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Discover more about volunteering with Aberlour Children's Charity. Read Wayne's volunteering story in Dundee.","media\u002Fwayne-elder-photo.jpg","2024-07-25T09:39:54.000000Z","2024-11-25T08:28:19.000000Z",{"id":57,"author_id":19,"slug":98,"is_featured":7,"title":99,"content":100,"content_overview":10,"published_at":101,"seo_title":102,"seo_description":10,"image":103,"story_type_id":104,"created_at":95,"updated_at":96},"elaines-sponsor-story","Elaine’s Sponsor story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Parent carer advisor, Elaine, has worked in the sector for more than 22 years and is a sponsor. She applies to the Urgent Assistance Fund on behalf of families in desperate need. Elaine talks about what families are facing.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve been a parent carer for over two decades and I am seeing a massive difference in the number of families that need financial help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Many of the families I work with are in employment, but because of the rising gas and electricity prices, they are struggling. Some can’t afford the mortgage payments with costs doubling, some families are having to sell their homes because they can’t afford to live in their areas anymore.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve never had families who work and own their home come to me asking for help, but we are being inundated with referrals and we are not the only ones. Requests to food banks have increased by 250% this year and they can’t keep up with the demand.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Everyone’s situation is unique. For example, I work with one family where two of the children have autism. The mum is working but has issues with childcare because the children can be very challenging, so this all costs money and means they don’t have a lot left. When the mum does get funding, she’ll keep that for the specialist foods that the children need. And she will eat from the food bank herself. “There is a lot of worry about what is to come and how things can change very quickly. If a bill comes in unexpectedly, they’re scared they’ll be cut off.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Even when it comes to financial support, emergency grants can take up to two and three weeks, and by that time it can be too late.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour’s Urgent Assistance Fund has been providing immediate financial relief for families with children (21 and under) suffering extreme hardship. Cash grants are provided to purchase basic essentials including food, heating, bedding and clothing for children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve no idea what we’d do without the \u003Ca title=\"Aberlour Urgent Assistance Fund\" href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fget-help\u002Furgent-assistance-fund\">Urgent Assistance Fund (UAF)\u003C\u002Fa>, there is nothing I can think of which meets the criteria and support for families in that immediate situation. Families in these emergency situations don’t have three weeks or three months to wait, especially when I am applying for basic items like food and money to pay for heating their homes.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When they do get the money through, the relief is immense. They can breathe. It’s like I’ve lifted a massive weight off their shoulders. “\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2023-12-07T00:00:00.000000Z","Elaine’s Sponsor story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Felaine.jpg",4,{"id":75,"author_id":19,"slug":106,"is_featured":7,"title":107,"content":108,"content_overview":10,"published_at":109,"seo_title":110,"seo_description":111,"image":112,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":96},"maggies-story","Maggie’s Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Aberlour’s Urgent Assistance Fund has made a real impact on Maggie* from Dundee. She lives with her 8-year-old twins Abbie* and Maya*. Maggie has health issues and is struggling with her finances, mental health and relationships although she has recently trained as a paramedic.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The family has been affected hugely by the catastrophic rise in cost-of-living – food, clothing, and energy being of particular concern.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In order to feed her children Maggie often goes without, sometimes for up to three days per week. She says:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Maya asked me at one point why I didn’t have dinner when I was sat at the table with them, and I had to just, lie and say that I’d had a big lunch. She’s at school. She doesn’t know that I don’t eat breakfast or lunch”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The cost of school uniforms and shoes was also a concern and Maggie worried that her girls would feel embarrassed not having the same as everyone else but had nowhere to turn. “Even asking friends and family, they’re in the same situation, so there wasn’t anyone else I could have asked”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Abbie has a lung condition and needs the heating on which is an added expense. Maggie says:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Because of her lung condition, I’ve got to have the heating on constantly. Just to help her breathe. The house has quite a lot of damp. I’ve got a dehumidifier and run that constantly to try and keep the damp levels down. I can’t think about the cost. It’s either the house is damp and she’s ill, or I spend more money on electric”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour stepped in with the \u003Ca title=\"Aberlour UAF\" href=\"\u002Fget-help\u002Furgent-assistance-fund\">Urgent Assistance Fund\u003C\u002Fa> and were able to give Maggie the support she needed. She said: “Being awarded the grant got me back on track. I was able to buy the things that were needed for school and food as well as gas and electric. It helped because I was getting really depressed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Aberlour can literally change your whole lifestyle. All it took was for that little bit of help and it affected everything – my mood, it helped me financially and it helped my relationships with my kids. It’s more than just money”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*names changed to protect identities\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2023-12-06T00:00:00.000000Z","Maggie’s Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Aberlour’s Urgent Assistance Fund has made a real impact on Maggie* from Dundee. She lives with her 8-year-old twins Abbie* and Maya*.","media\u002Fmaggie.jpg",{"id":104,"author_id":19,"slug":114,"is_featured":7,"title":115,"content":116,"content_overview":10,"published_at":109,"seo_title":117,"seo_description":10,"image":118,"story_type_id":37,"created_at":95,"updated_at":96},"chelseas-uaf-story","Chelsea’s UAF Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Aberlour’s support and Urgent Assistance Fund has had a lasting impact on one mother from Glasgow, who has been working with the charity since she was a teenager. The 28-year-old single mum, who has three kids under eight, said:\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve been in touch with Aberlour for more than 10 years, from when I was a teenager struggling with my own issues until now, as a single mum.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve had a hard time with money. I’ve got three kids, I don’t get benefit payments for the third, and with bills and everything else going up, never mind providing for us on my own, we’re at breaking point.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The children just keep growing, and this year I didn’t have the money to buy them school uniforms, underwear, socks, shoes, jackets, bags or pencils with everything else I needed to pay for. School was starting in two weeks, and I was panicking but with help from \u003Ca title=\"Aberlour UAF\" href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fget-help\u002Furgent-assistance-fund\">Aberlour’s Urgent Assistance Fund\u003C\u002Fa>, I managed to get them kitted out in time, which was a massive weight off my shoulders. Without it, I would have probably kept them off school because I didn’t have any of the stuff that they needed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve also received money from Aberlour to buy beds for the kids. My four-year-old son had been having lots of accidents, and I tried to clean the beds as best I could, but it wasn’t great. With the money, I was able to buy new bunk beds, mattresses, pillows, duvets and bedding for my kids, which helped massively.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Speaking about the impact of living in poverty, the single mum said:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My mental health has been really bad; the cost of living crisis has really affected me, and I haven’t been coping. I’ve not been sending the kids to school and nursery when I should. It becomes such a struggle and sometimes everything seems to get on top of me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My eldest’s attendance has been pretty bad. For me, it is the thought of going out and being around people, and not knowing if I have the money to give him a snack when he wants it. I’m constantly worried about money all the time. I really worry they might tell their teachers that they are hungry, because it is a struggle to put food on the table.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I have been trying to work since my youngest son was eight months old. Last year I worked two jobs to provide for my kids, but by the time I went into town for an hour shift, I was spending more money than I was earning.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I definitely worry about how our situation will affect my kids. They’re only young once and I’m wasting their life doing nothing with them, stuck in the house because I can’t afford anything. I feel horrible that I have to choose which days to put the electricity on. Other days I have to pick between bread or milk. I skip meals and go hungry so my kids have what they need, but I’m only able to buy the cheapest food options just to make sure they are fed, and it worries me that I can’t give them better quality.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I know my kids see me struggle too which is another worry; I’m often down and upset. My eldest is eight years old and it’s a lot of pressure on him. He asks if he can stay off school to help me. He has already taken on a lot to help me but he’s only little. He has had to deal with stress that no kid\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>should have to deal with. He shouldn’t have to worry about choosing to buy a sweet in the shop and helping us buy food for dinner.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I cannot take them out, we can’t go anywhere, whether it’s a soft play or basically anywhere. They’re stuck in a house, so they’re demented. They’re constantly arguing with each other because they’re stuck within the same four walls and there’s not much for them to do. It’s horrible. I’d just like to take them to soft play.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As for Christmas they just don’t understand why other kids have got more expensive stuff and they’ve got cheaper stuff, so they’re like does Santa not like me? As a parent, I feel like a failure.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’m stuck in this rut and without financial support for people like Aberlour, I don’t know what I would do. Sometimes I feel like I’m in a hole and I can see the ladders, but I can’t reach them, but with Aberlour’s support I feel like I can start to get out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The support they give to families is amazing, they make you feel so welcome, like being part of a big family. I can’t describe how good it’s been to have their help. When I am really struggling, they go above and beyond. They will listen to me, speak to me and go out of their way to give support. If we didn’t have access to things like the Urgent Assistance Fund, it feels like we would have nothing. They have brought joy back to our lives when it feels like all hope is lost.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Chelsea’s UAF Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fchelsea-uaf.jpg",{"id":37,"author_id":19,"slug":120,"is_featured":7,"title":121,"content":122,"content_overview":10,"published_at":123,"seo_title":124,"seo_description":125,"image":126,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":127},"rebeccas-story","Rebecca’s Story","\u003Cp>Last year my dad had a heart attack and my world just stopped. Thankfully, he survived and recovered, but one of the first things he did when he got home from the hospital was to begin making sure his affairs were in order. He knew that sort of admin was the last thing we’d have wanted to think about should the worst have happened.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This experience reminded me of how fragile life is. I’m only in my mid-30s, but I realised that if anything were to happen to my husband and me, there was nothing in place to say what we’d want to happen to our baby and house.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We support Aberlour and found out recently that they offer a free will writing service in partnership with trusted solicitors.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It was really handy to use their solicitors’ free will writing service to make these provisions: the service was friendly, straightforward, and sensitive.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Making a donation to Aberlour after I’d made my will was a no brainer; I’d made plans for my own child’s future while making a positive difference for another child’s future.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan class=\"ui-provider ed bio bip biq bir bis bit biu biv biw bix biy biz bja bjb bjc bjd bje bjf bjg bjh bji bjj bjk bjl bjm bjn bjo bjp bjq bjr bjs bjt bju bjv\" dir=\"ltr\">\u003Ca href=\"\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffundraising\u002Fleave-us-a-gift-in-your-will\">\u003Cstrong>Learn more about our free wills service and book a free will appointment\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>","2023-09-22T00:00:00.000000Z","Rebecca's Story - Aberlour","Making a donation to Aberlour after I’d made my will was a no-brainer; I’d made plans for my own child’s future while making a positive difference for another.","media\u002FRebecca.jpg","2025-02-19T14:27:30.000000Z",{"id":129,"author_id":19,"slug":130,"is_featured":7,"title":131,"content":132,"content_overview":10,"published_at":133,"seo_title":134,"seo_description":135,"image":136,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},6,"bronwyns-story","Bronwyn’s Story","\u003Cstyle>\nimg.mx-auto.rounded-md.my-10.w-96 {\n    display: none;\n}\n\u003C\u002Fstyle>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ciframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"100%\" height=\"315\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.youtube.com\u002Fembed\u002FSim3hzaeWoU?si=Av6syGUQIufy9I3v\" title=\"YouTube video player\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" allowfullscreen>\u003C\u002Fiframe>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“My biggest fear was having my baby taken away.”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thanks to support from \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffamily-service-south-ayrshire\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa> and South Ayrshire Council my baby, Marcus, wasn’t taken into care. He is thriving and I am so proud of him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At 18 years old and 30 weeks pregnant I was first introduced to Lidia. Lidia was my social worker from \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.south-ayrshire.gov.uk\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">South Ayrshire Council.\u003C\u002Fa> My midwife raised concerns about my partner Justin and my housing conditions. We needed a bit of help to bring our baby home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>After Marcus was born, I took ill. I had to have a blood transfusion. This meant I struggled to look after Marcus. I kept collapsing. One midwife told me not to pick him up in case I collapsed while holding him. This wasn’t passed on to another midwife who reported me for neglect. With social work already involved, questions over my bond with Marcus and my post-natal depression, Marcus was placed on the child protection register.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I felt overwhelmed and anxious. I am a young, first-time mum. I didn’t know what to do. My biggest fear was having my baby taken away.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But that’s when Aberlour and Social Work stepped in to help. My Aberlour worker, Fleur, and Lidia helped explain to me why Marcus was on the child protection register. They explained that there was a plan in place to help and what the plan was. When I understood that, I felt comforted. I knew they were there to help. I realised they’re not going to take Marcus away. The main goal was to keep him with me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There were lots of people supporting us, most days we had someone in the house. Fleur helped to teach me about bonding with Marcus. I struggled with our bond. Fleur took me through childcare courses. She taught me how to make up bottles and told us about baby led weaning when it was relevant for him. I had to deal with so many healthcare professionals. Fleur helped to sum everything up so I could understand what was going on and what I needed to do. Ultimately Fleur helped me become a better and more confident parent.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lidia was the backbone of our support. She created and organised our support plan. She made sure everything was going as it needed to.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It was so important for Aberlour and Social Work to work closely together to support us. It meant that everyone came to the house when planned, there was no clashing. Lidia and Fleur supported us so we could have one day as a family with no one coming to the house. A day for me, Justin and Marcus. We were helped to be a family and the bond that we have is so important. Marcus enjoys being with me and he is thriving.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thanks to all the support we had, one year after Marcus was placed on the child protection register, he was removed. I was so relieved. But it was also nerve-wracking. I was concerned that all my support was going to disappear. But then I realised that all the support wasn’t going to disappear, I’ve still got people to help me. The support was gradually reduced until it was no longer needed. I’m so proud of how far Marcus has come, from a tiny little baby to a toddler now running around the place. I’m proud of myself and my confidence in being a parent.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Recently I was able to share my story at an event for agencies like councils and health boards. It was important to me to share my story. I want to stop the stigma that Social Work are only there to take your children away. I wanted to share my story that with the right support, from the right people there is light at the end of the tunnel.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am glad we had this support at the start of our journey so that I could learn from the beginning and not a few years down the line.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am excited about the future for our family. We are staying in temporary accommodation right now. But I hope we will get our own forever home soon and I can decorate Marcus’ room with cars like he has asked for.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>Bronwyn\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2023-08-08T00:00:00.000000Z","Bronwyn's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Find out how Aberlour supported young mum Bronwyn to keep her family together and stop her son being taken into care.","media\u002F0E5A5360.jpg","2024-11-25T08:28:20.000000Z",{"id":139,"author_id":19,"slug":140,"is_featured":7,"title":141,"content":142,"content_overview":10,"published_at":143,"seo_title":144,"seo_description":10,"image":145,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},7,"alexandras-volunteer-mentor-story","Alexandra’s Volunteer Mentor Story","\u003Cp>Volunteering not only makes a meaningful difference to individuals and communities, but can also enrich your own life, boost your self-esteem and improve mental wellbeing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Alexandra (name changed) shared with us the transformative experience volunteering has brought to her life. With a desire to give back and make positive impact in her community, Alexandra became a volunteer mentor with Aberlour. She tells us how volunteering helped to bring purpose back to her life and helped her overcome personal challenges.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Alexandra first heard about Aberlour through her previous job, which involved working with children and families. “I had been out of work for a while due to mental health issues. To improve my mental health and not to feel so isolated I decided to go down the route of volunteering.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Ready to embrace new challenges, Alexandra became a volunteer mentor for our Sustain Service in Angus. The service helps families overcome their challenges and difficulties by building long-term relationships that help them get back on their feet. Having previously worked with children and families and drawing from her own struggles with mental health, she had a unique ability to treat the families with empathy, compassion and understanding.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour’s volunteering team also supported Alexandra to build on her skills to help her become a better volunteer. She says, “What also attracted me to Aberlour was the training and online courses they offered. I have thoroughly enjoyed them and gained knowledge, which I can use in my volunteering role and in future employment.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As a volunteer mentor, Alexandra found immense joy and fulfilment in her role. She works closely with the family she is assigned to and helps them to overcome challenges in their lives, while also offering practical help, support and advice. She is also a listening ear and offers encouragement to the family when they are feeling down.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I look forward to meeting with the family each week… It’s so rewarding when you see the family thriving and moving forward. It’s an extremely rewarding role and has helped me to gain more experience, knowledge, and confidence.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Alexandra acknowledges that the success and personal growth she’s experienced through volunteering is down to the support she received from the Aberlour volunteering team.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“One thing I need to mention is the support I get from my Volunteer Coordinator. She is amazing! She has been a great help easing me into my volunteer role and I know that she is always there for me if any issues come up.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Knowing that she has a strong support system behind her has given Alexandra the confidence to thrive in her volunteering role.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Become a Volunteer with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>“I would highly recommend volunteering with Aberlour. It isn amazing charity helping Scotland’s most vulnerable children, young people, and families.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Whether you have a background in working with children and families or simply have a passion for making a positive impact, Aberlour offers a variety of volunteer roles to suit your interests and skills. When volunteering with Aberlour, you have the chance to gain valuable experience and help build a brighter future for Scotland’s children, young people, and families.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If you’re seeking a meaningful and rewarding way to give back, consider joining Aberlour as a volunteer. For more information, please visit:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\">www.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2023-06-01T00:00:00.000000Z","Alexandra's Volunteer Mentor Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Falexandra-stock-image.jpg",{"id":147,"author_id":19,"slug":148,"is_featured":7,"title":149,"content":150,"content_overview":10,"published_at":143,"seo_title":151,"seo_description":10,"image":152,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},8,"davids-story-volunteer-and-make-a-difference-in-a-childs-life","David’s Story: Volunteer and make a difference in a child’s life","\u003Cp>At Aberlour Children’s Charity, our dedicated volunteers play a crucial role in supporting and enriching the lives of the children, young people and families who need our help. In Falkirk, our Primary Years Outreach Service have witnessed first-hand the incredible impact volunteers have on the children they work with.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One of these remarkable Falkirk volunteers is David, who has gone above and beyond to make a positive difference. As a volunteer befriender, David is matched with a child to do fun activities together, work towards achieving goals and learn new skills. For a child, having a befriender like David can help them feel less isolated, boost their confidence and equip them to deal with life’s challenges. David’s journey exemplifies how anyone, regardless of prior experience, can bring joy, companionship, and new experiences into a child’s life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Discovering a New Calling\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David first heard about Aberlour when a friend suggested that he would make an excellent volunteer befriender. Although volunteering with children wasn’t something he had previously considered, it became evident that David had the personality, people skills, and life experience that would make him an exceptional volunteer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Creating Lasting Memories\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>After being matched with Andrew (name changed), David wasted no time in making a positive impact. Every week, David had organised activities for them to do in the community. From playing football and bowling to cycling, table tennis, and exploring soft play areas, David always prioritised Andrew’s interests. He also helped to boost Andrew’s confidence and encouraged him to try new things.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As their relationship grew, David’s dedication and reliability became evident. He was not only a positive role model for Andrew, but also a good listener, and being there for Andrew when he needed him most.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>A Positive Change for All\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The feedback we received from Andrew speaks volumes about the difference David has had on his life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“He is always really nice to me and treats me with a lot of respect.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Andrew’s parents also expressed their gratitude to have David in their son’s life:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Andrew loves his time with David and wants to see him all the time. I don’t know what we will do when David stops coming for him.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The team at Aberlour Primary Years Service in Falkirk also recognised the special bond David and Andrew had:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“David and Andrew get on so well! David has made a massive positive impact on him and has introduced him to so many new experiences. David is very reliable and thoughtful of Andrew and his needs. Andrew has asked me how long he has left with David as he doesn’t want the visits to stop. A match made in heaven!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Trying New Things\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David’s influence extended beyond just creating fun memories. He played a pivotal role in encouraging Andrew to try new things, including putting himself forward to be the goalkeeper for his football team. By providing encouragement and support, David helped nurture Andrew’s confidence in himself and his skills so that he could explore new opportunities.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Join David and Make a Difference\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David’s story demonstrates how volunteering with Aberlour can make a positive difference in a child’s life. His commitment, reliability and friendship have had a lasting impact on Andrew. If you have the desire to be a reliable, and fun presence in a child’s life, please consider becoming a volunteer befriender with Aberlour. We have many volunteering opportunities across Scotland. With flexible time commitments, we can find opportunities that work for you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We are immensely grateful for volunteers like David who selflessly give their time, energy, and companionship to help children like Andrew. Join us in creating a brighter future for Scotland’s children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>To discover more about volunteering, please visit:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\">www.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","David’s Story: Volunteer and make a difference in a child’s life - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FIMG_2239-rotated.jpg",{"id":154,"author_id":19,"slug":155,"is_featured":7,"title":156,"content":157,"content_overview":10,"published_at":158,"seo_title":159,"seo_description":10,"image":160,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},10,"podcast-meet-our-fostering-couple-rhonda-gordon","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering couple, Rhonda & Gordon","\u003Cp>\u003Cem>Originally recorded Q1: 2023 with \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.centralfm.co.uk\u002F\">Central FM – The Forth Valley’s Local Radio Station\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cul>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod1\">Introduction to Rhonda & Gordon and choosing Aberlour for fostering\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod2\">Foster caring for children with additional needs\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod3\">How Rhonda & Gordon’s foster son came to live with them\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod4\">Foster caring and finances\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod5\">Rhonda & Gordon: Award-winning foster carers\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod6\">High-quality, specialised respite care and backup\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod7\">Understanding conditions and how Aberlour helps with training\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod8\">Advice for anyone considering becoming a foster carer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003C\u002Ful>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod1\">Introduction to Rhonda & Gordon and choosing Aberlour for fostering\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hi, it’s Liam here from the Central FM breakfast show. Thanks for getting our latest podcast tuned in, and it’s our focus on fostering series with Aberlour Fostering here on Central FM. Episode three is bringing a slightly different look again at a different kind of foster home, with some added in complexities. I’m really happy that Rhonda and Gordon from Falkirk have joined us for this.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’ll ask you guys, first and foremost, why did you want to get into fostering?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, I was a heavy plant fitter all my life, and I knew quite a lot of the power station in Kincardine was closing. So, I was looking at other options, and I didn’t want to carry on what I was doing. I spoke to someone at my work who knew someone that was doing fostering, and he suggested that I would be a good foster carer and maybe I should look into it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That’s why I started doing it, I went to a couple of meetings, the same district councils that was doing fostering, and then I had spoke to Rhonda’s friend, who was with Aberlour at the time, doing fostering. She suggested that I could go to Aberlour and have a chat with them and see what the kind of things that they do. And it kind of just started off from there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And what were the kind of differences there? Because you did mention talking to local authorities about things. What was it about Aberlour that really made you want to take this further?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I found them very professional. We had two ladies came out, and they interviewed us, and they told us all about Aberlour. We were very impressed, and we just took it from there. So they took us on, and we did all the training, and they do training consistently throughout the year. So they provide us with a social worker as well. If we have any worries, any concerns, there’s always someone at the end of the phone to ask.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>On that, and I know that great support, we’ve touched on another episode as well. If you’ve not listened to those yet, go check them out because we go into a lot of detail about all the support that’s available. I was lucky enough to meet Grace and Kerryanne from Aberlour, who was such a positive energy in this very same studio that you guys are in today.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Do you feel that as well when you speak to your social work team? Do you feel that kind of “family of positivity” that certainly those two were giving off here?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. I mean, it’s just like one big family, isn’t it? And Grace was a social worker for most of her six years. She was really supportive, and she came to all of the meetings at school. Now we have another social worker called Liz, and she’s absolutely brilliant as well. She’s really helpful. We have Zoom meetings about once a month, and she phone calls as well. Anything. Anything she can do, she will. She’s very helpful.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The training that they have. You get to pick sometimes whoever suits us so.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There was training in autism which we were particularly interested in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. So that was something that we would go to. But yeah, when you go to Aberlour, it’s just like one big family, and they’ll lay your lunch on for you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You do lovely lunches. We call it “the Aberlour lunch”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. Really, really friendly people, aren’t they?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Just a wee upgrade on your ham sandwich. Sounds like my cup of tea, to be honest with you. So, you mentioned that training for, just to take one subject, autism there, and we’ll get into why in just a second. I think the great thing is as well, you guys are in Falkirk, the headquarters for Aberlour is in Stirling now, but you’ve got support from all over.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You can do the Zoom meetings if they’re a wee bit further away, but that knowledge from right across the country you’ve got access to. You mentioned “autism” as one of the things you wanted to get training on. That leads us nicely into telling us more about your fostering journey and, actually, your foster son, who’s now your permanent foster son who’s with you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod2\">Foster caring for children with additional needs\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’ve heard so many tales so far with families who have brought in foster kids with different needs and challenges who maybe had maybe traumatic pasts and just needed a real kick start to life or missed out in the first few years of their life, perhaps. You guys have got a slightly different story to tell, and actually, your son has his own challenges that you’ve had to try and work out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, he’s got double incontinence, epilepsy, autism, and he has a significant development delay. So even though he’s 15 and a half just now, he actually presents as about three or four. He’s still into Postman Pat and Fireman Sam and Goofy and all these things. And he is just really into his iPad as the main thing in his life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But you guys, you know these things. You can help him just enjoy all of these different elements by, okay, “He likes his iPad”. But most kids do, and that’s it. What kind of things did you have to look at before your son came to live with you? I know you did move house, and then you had to build that into your future because also you wanted this to be a long-term thing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So you had to think longer term about your own house and what it was going to look like and be like.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He was having seizures. Gordon found it quite difficult to get him upstairs to his bed because after the seizures, he was just out for the count, and Gordon’s having to give him a fireman’s lift up the stairs. He was getting heavier as he was getting older. So we decided to move to a bungalow, and we’re now in an old farmhouse out in the countryside, and it’s just that’s a lot better for him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Everything’s on the ground level. He seems to move about the house more than he did.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Because he doesn’t like climbing stairs, he’s got a disability with his feet.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. It’s more or less like flat-footed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It should have been in casts when he was young, but it doesn’t get done. Yeah, so he does walk a bit strangely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For him to go down the stairs a dozen times a day, depending and if he’s in his bedroom or down in the living room, you could see he was getting tired. So we kind of said, “Well, what do we do here?” Rhonda’s grandparents’ farm was up for sale, so we decided he would like it out in the countryside, which he loves now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I could only imagine, as a kid who grew up in a concrete jungle myself. I can only imagine how exciting it must be. To be surrounded by animals and farmland and everything else.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, but because he was having seizures when we first got him, his seizures were more or less once every week, maybe more. And because I could see the stress, and I was thinking, “How can I stop this?”, “How can I make him feel better in his self?” And it was just changing his life into something good.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Whether it was taking him for a walk, say, if he’d been on his iPad and he’d got stressed, I would say, “Come on, we’ll go for a walk, see the deer”, or whatever. You could see this pattern where it was reducing the amount of seizures he was having, and there you notice the amount of stress was kind of level, and it wasn’t as severe.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And so he was maybe having a seizure once a month. Now that’s six years that he’s been with us, and we know the signs of a seizure. He has three links to it. It’s usually cold, a nosebleed, and a high body temperature. These are the three things that can cause a seizure. So we’ve always been mindful that if he’s in the house, not to get too warm. If he’s got a cold, just try and watch him a little bit more, and when he’s wandering about the house, just in case, he takes a seizure.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’ve got fans in every room, and we’ve got air purifiers just to try to keep his temperature level.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. So these are the kind of three main things. And where he’s at now, his seizures…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Every once a month, maybe, once every two months.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, but he doesn’t have the stress that he had when he first came to us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And that’s thanks to the learning curve that you guys have went on to work these things out. I’m pretty certain that Aberlour would have been part of that journey to help you work all these things. Especially at the start because did you know of all of the challenges that were going to lie ahead with your son? Or is there things that have been added in as you have grown older with him?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’re really lucky because our son doesn’t have any behaviour issues. It’s just really physical ones. He’s really a happy, happy boy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He’ll give you a smile no matter what part of the day or how Ill he’s feeling. If he’s got a cold or he can’t get out his bed. He always manages to give you a smile.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And when we left today. What did he say?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I said, “I’m going away to Stirling”. And I gave him a cuddle, and he says, “Bye-bye, take care”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He is quite sweet.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That’s nice.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod3\">How Rhonda & Gordon’s foster son came to live with them\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Did you always feel and know that you wanted to support a foster child who had these needs? Or was it something that just happened? Because the stories we’ve had so far are different to yours. Did you always have in your mind that if you were to bring a foster child, then there was going to be someone with these kinds of additional support needs, or that it just happened that way?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We just finished training and got passed as foster carers, and there was three potential matches. Out of all these matches, we decided we could deal with our son better than the other two. Different foster carers have different things that they can deal with, that they can give.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I know that matching process is really important for Abelour. It’s one of the things they really pride themselves on, to make sure that they get the right family for the right person. Obviously, it’s been proven, the fact that you’ve now got that permanent relationship with your son.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s really important to get the right match.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That period of time that maybe six-nine months period where you’re doing the form, you’re learning a lot about yourselves as well. How did you find that process?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And that the process is quite intensive, isn’t it? You’ve really got to dig deep. As I say, we had Grace as a social worker, and she said, “If you have any skeletons, she’ll dig them out”. And it was fine. But yeah, they go into everything. Your background and a lot of detail. It brings a lot back because some things you’ve actually forgotten about.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But it is very important because these children who are coming in have already had so much going on in their lives, and they need to make sure that they’re going to the right places.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s the right person, yeah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod4\">Foster caring and finances\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, absolutely. Now we’ll touch on the finances a little bit as well because this is something I’ve been trying to talk about a lot in the podcast because it’s a big decision for many people. I know, Rhonda, you had a job, and you decided to give it up. How big a decision was that for you?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. I had a full-time job, and gradually I just cut down the hours. I was still missing out on a lot of things with our son, so eventually, I just gave up altogether. We’re both living on the one wage, but we can manage, and Aberlour also provide maintenance for a child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So again, it’s quite a comfortable life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, that balance is good for you because there’s something I know. I don’t know if you mind me talking about this, Gordon, but you had a brush with COVID right at the start the lockdown, and quite badly too. Has that in any way really just reiterated that you’ve made the right decision to have that balance in your life where you don’t have to rush out to work? You can spend time with your family. Especially having you know…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, I mean, I didn’t know at the time it was COVID. I was 17 days in my bed, so Rhonda was doing everything. Taking care of our son and doing all the stuff in the house, we also have horses, and she was doing the horses. I don’t know what would have happened if she hadn’t been there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I now think to myself, “I’m getting better”. It took a while for my son to, when I was in the hospital, to have that bond with him again. When I came out the hospital, I thought he had kind of a tighter bond with Rhonda. But yeah, it’s come back again with him. It’s just he didn’t know why I was in the hospital or why I was in this room for 17 days.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, he doesn’t understand these things.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod5\">Rhonda & Gordon: Award-winning foster carers\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’ve had to rebuild that again a little bit and spend that extra time doing that. That was another challenge that you had to overcome, and you’ve also proven that you’re more than capable of overcoming these challenges. I’m glad to hear that you’ve made a recovery as well. I think it’s proof in the pudding that you guys did an amazing job because you won an award for your fostering. Tell us about that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Won an award last year. Our social worker at that time, Grace, had nominated us for that, and we won. And it was a really big surprise.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The Fostering Network.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They sent us a beautiful hamper, didn’t they? Sandwiches and cakes and an award statue. That was lovely. We’re really pleased about that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod6\">High-quality, specialised respite care and backup\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think that’s kind of the proof right there that you guys did an amazing job. Also, with the support of Aberlour, there to help you do that. With your son, again, this is a long-term thing for you guys. Is this what your fostering journey is going to be now forever, do you think? Are you happy just with your son? You’re there pretty much full-time for him. Or is there anything else you think you could handle, is one enough for you guys?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, this is our life, just with the one. But we have offered to do any emergency care if something comes up. I mean, we have three bedrooms, so we do have an extra bedroom. If help is needed, we have offered to be there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That’s amazing as well. I can imagine at times, your life can get quite intense and not a lot of breaks, and it can become quite stressful at times. We don’t mind telling all the bear all truths on this podcast news because it’s important that everyone knows what they’re getting into for fostering. It’s very important for you guys to get a break now and again and those short-term breaks, and maybe you’re thinking about helping with other people. You guys can tap into that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’re happy to do that. Yes, I am. The foster carers do have access to respite, so that are some respite carers who can either take your child overnight or possibly for the week. We haven’t had our son stay overnight at all because we like having them at home. But say, we wanted to go to the cinema. Then someone would come out for about three hours and let us away and give us that break. The respite care is there if it’s needed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And because of Aberlour’s fantastic training, the people who come in to take your place, even though it’s a short time, but it might feel like a longer time for him. They’re very well trained to come in and do the activities that will actually engage him and make him feel quite happy whilst they’re there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes, and they’ve had to do training and first-aid and everything like that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>A short break carer experienced our son’s first seizure. It happened to him down in the park, and he doesn’t like going into buildings that are quite dark. He came out, and he notices that he’s a wee bit unsteady on his feet. Down he went, and he had a seizure. Luckily there was two off-duty police officers there, who were also trained and asked how long the seizure was. The short break carer said, “It’s only two minutes or so”. And they took the jackets off, put them under his head and just waited until he came to. Then they lifted him and put him in the car, and the short-break carers took our son home, which he then has to go into this sleep mode as part of his recovery. You could see it was a bad thing, but it’s a good thing for them because they also saw a child having a seizure and knowing what to do because they had been trained by Aberlour and had got information from us or the patterns to have a seizure. They kind of understood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They knew how to do it. Yeah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod7\">Understanding conditions and how Aberlour helps with training\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. You would never wish it to happen, but it does happen to him. At least you guys know you’ve got peace of mind that it can be dealt with, even if you’re doing something else. Are there any other challenges that you want to talk about that have happened with your son that you’ve overcame?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For me, it’s just trying to be our son and understand why is he taking seizures and what is the reason he’s having these seizures, which we’ve put it down to stress. 99% of the time, it’s through stress. If we can reduce that stress, then that’s got to reduce the amount of seizures he’s having. The seizures have a knock-on effect, and I think that where we are now with him, that seems to be working because we’ve seen big changes.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We don’t have to make these phone calls. He’s had a seizure. We’re learning stuff from his seizures all the time. Plus the training that you’re getting also helps us. I just was kind of on the ball now, as far as his seizures go.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One of the other challenges is that he can’t actually read or write. So whatever he wants on his iPad, he has to say it into the microphone, or we type it in. He can be quite demanding, but it’s not his fault. He just doesn’t have the capability to read or write.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s something you just have to do from his point of view. If he could go and type in “Peppa Pig” or whatever, that would be fine, but he has to come to us to ask us what he wants. It’s become part of life now. We’ve been doing it for so long.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes. And actually, the technology is getting better all the time in general. For those who don’t have additional needs, it can be maybe put down some laziness, people can do things really quickly. But actually, things like the voice activation, even the latest on the TV boxes you get now, the remote controls have got that going. Do you think that’s something he might eventually be able to pick up?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It would be wonderful if we could actually use the voice activation at some point.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We touched on the difference in his physical age and his mental age. Is that something that can still grow and develop as he gets older?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Slightly. He’s not going to develop by leaps and bounds. You do see very, very small differences, and it’s slow progress, but you do see progress.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We were told by one of the doctors that he could get to a certain point, and it just kind of flatlines, and he wouldn’t improve from that. Or there could be a stage where he would improve quite a lot and then flatline again. They don’t have the answers.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Okay. So you still don’t really know the answer to that. But there’s still a lot of positives and potential that some of those things that maybe stress him at the moment, he might eventually over time…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. Maybe we’ll see developments. I mean, he’s a member of Ballantine’s, and we’ll been in the pool, in the water, and he used to always cling around my neck, and he wouldn’t be himself in the pool. But now he can go himself. He can walk up and down the pool, quite the thing. He loves the spa pool, so he’s becoming more confident there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. I suppose he’s evolving, and it’s maybe in a slower way than what you and I would. But he is changing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You can see it, and the thing is, because of the life that you guys have, you’re with him a lot, and you see these things. I’m pretty sure Grace and other members of the Social work team. They don’t see them, maybe quite as much. They may even spot them more so. You see him every day quite intensely. And that’s nice to hear about positive for them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod8\">Advice for anyone considering becoming a foster carer\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’re both obviously done an amazing job. Is there anything you’d like to give us a bit of advice for anyone who’s wondering about getting on to foster caring? Be that in the situation you guys are in, and the challenges that you face for your son, or just wider fostering in general. What would be the advice that you would give people in the Forth Valley?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would say if you’re interested, go ahead and contact a fostering agency. Get the information, have someone come out and actually tell you what’s all involved and just take it from there. You will need an extra bedroom. It’s a good opportunity to work from home, and it does have a lot of advantages.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And more specifically, when it comes to working with Aberlour. What were the real positive things that you would tell people about Aberlour to maybe choose them?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think that they’re very professional. There’s a lot of support. A lot of support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. The aftercare that they have in place is just that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The training programs, there’s a lot of training done by Children In Scotland, and Aberlour pays for you to get that training. They’re just really supportive.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If you kind of take a step back and say to yourself, “Would you have done this ten years ago, 20 years ago?” For me, I would have said “Yes”. Sometimes you hear of people that’s been fostering for 30, 40 years, and they’ve fostered all these children. If I could turn back time. I’d probably done the same, especially with knowing Aberlour, the kind of things that they do for you, the help you get, the training you get from Aberlour. There’s always somebody there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>To get the lunches. You mentioned earlier.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lunches, lunch. Yes. Yes. \u003Cem>[Laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And there’s also carers’ group meetings once a month. You can go and get a roll and something and a tea or a coffee and have a chat with the other foster carers.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And just share your stories and give tips and advice to each other.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And if there’s any updates, then we get told at the meeting as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Also, Aberlour sends you emails of online training, and there’s quite a lot, for me, it’s autism. I just try to get as much information that I can about autism. It’s something I want now because…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There’s such a wide range and spectrum, obviously, and so many things with that, I’m sure, that’s quite a lot to learn.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s like I got told by one of my son’s teachers that had said. “If you have met a child with autism, you’ve only met one.” Because all children that’s autistic have a different style of autism, so you can say, “Well, I’ve met all these children, and it’s autistic” because they’re not all the same level.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. And they have different interests and things. So, you’re getting all that support and a chance to do all that and even make yourself better in a way and more knowledgeable, all through Aberlour. Whilst, and there’s no point beating around the bush, getting paid.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>While getting paid for it, yes.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>While at the same time, your lovely farm rural life just outside Falkirk and enjoying things there and so…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s all good.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’ve made clearly the right decisions, and no turning back for you guys. No regrets?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Gordon\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Definitely not, no.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Rhonda and Gordon, thank you so much for joining us on the latest series.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Rhonda\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thank you, sir. Thank you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2023-05-04T00:00:00.000000Z","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering couple, Rhonda & Gordon - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FAberlour-RhondaAndGordon.jpg",{"id":162,"author_id":19,"slug":163,"is_featured":7,"title":164,"content":165,"content_overview":10,"published_at":158,"seo_title":166,"seo_description":10,"image":167,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},9,"podcast-meet-our-fostering-team-kerryanne-grace","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering team, Kerryanne & Grace","\u003Cp>\u003Cem>Originally recorded Q1: 2023 with \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.centralfm.co.uk\u002F\">Central FM – The Forth Valley’s Local Radio Station\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cul>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod1\">Introducing Kerryanne and Grace\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod2\">Aberlour’s pride in their matching process\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod3\">The type of support Aberlour provides to foster families\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod4\">What Aberlour looks for in potential foster carers\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod5\">Supporting families, birth children and fostering togetherness\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod6\">More ways Aberlour support foster families financially and in general\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod7\">Final note on who we are looking for in foster carers and what makes Aberlour unique\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003C\u002Ful>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod1\">Introducing Kerryanne and Grace\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Welcome to another Central FM podcast in association with Aberlour, the children’s charity. We are focusing on fostering in the very latest edition of the podcast. Really delighted to welcome a couple of members of the Aberlour team. We’ve heard so much from some amazing fostering families so far, but this is going to be a nice, little different view from people who are actually right at the frontline and helping these services continue, develop and get better. Kerryanne and Grace both joining us in the studio. Kerryanne, I’ll start with you first as a service manager. Welcome along to Central FM today. Tell us a wee bit about yourself and what you do at Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thanks Liam. I’m the service manager for our fostering team and I’ve worked for Aberlour for 19 years. For me, the priority in my job is to ensure that all of our foster carers are well supported by our team, and we have foster carers all over Scotland. We’ve got carers up north, carers down in the borders and anything in between, and it’s ensuring that we offer a bespoke and specialist fostering support to those and a high-quality service to all.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My other role is obviously supporting our team, and we’ve got five team members, all of are very experienced foster and social workers. We also have a background, a lot of our team, in residential childcare as well. So we’ve got a real insight into the children’s trauma and life experiences.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Grace, you are part of a team and you’re a social worker as well. How does your day-to-day look at Aberlour? You must be, I’m sure, really delighted to be involved in the charity.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes. I’m Grace, and I’ve worked for Aberlour for over 20 years, and as Kerryanne said, we’ve worked in a variety of roles within Aberlour itself. My role is to support the foster carers. I become their supervisor and social worker. From the very start, what we do is we go out and meet them. If they want to come forward, we do a specialised assessment which is called “the Form F”, and that can take anything from three to six months to complete. Then once re  approved, we then become their social worker, and we support them all the way through their journey, basically on a 1 to 1 basis.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So you get to know them really, really well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes. We get to know them really well through the assessment process. Which is, I suppose some people call it, “like a roller coaster of emotions”. Some people call it “like a counselling session”. So, it does become quite an intrusive session, but everybody enjoys it. We make it enjoyable. And what we look for in our foster carers is lots of fun. They have to be fun-orientated people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod2\">Aberlour’s pride in their matching process\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You talk about the challenging entry experience, but that’s the really important bit because that makes the fostering journey and the matching process so much easier. It gives it much more longevity and makes sure that those families are actually together as long as possible.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Definitely, because we find what their likes are, what their dislikes are. If they’ve got pets, if they’ve got children, what their children like. That’s when our family worker comes in on its own. Gill very much works with their biological children. So, we find out what they like because that’s really important when we do come to the matching process, and we don’t just pick a child because they’ve got a vacancy to fit into their family. It’s about everyone fitting in together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So Kerryanne. For example, if I was trying to get myself and the family involved in foster caring and say, you thought I wasn’t particularly suitable for one particular child or children. It doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t be suitable for everyone.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think what we do at Aberlour is really pride ourselves in the match. So as Grace says, we don’t have to specifically match a child because a foster carer has a vacancy. It’s very much based on the individual child’s needs, who are waiting for a family and also that family’s needs themself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So yeah. So as you’re asking me, if one child wasn’t a match for you, we would certainly work really hard to ensure that we find that match for the child that’s waiting and for your family as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You do pride yourself on those longer-term relationships. Whilst I know that Aberlour does offer those short-term stays as well, what you really want to try and do is to just find those long-term families for those children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think what we are blessed with at Aberlour Fostering is that we’ve got some families long term that have been with us. We’ve got one child in particular that I can think of who been with us since he was three, and he’s now 16. We’ve all known him in that time frame, and I think that’s what makes us special and unique. We’ve had children with us for so long, and it is like a family. It’s not just the service.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We really pride ourselves in making sure that everybody feels that they’re good and they’re feeling like a wider part of a family. The support that we offer it’s very bespoke, it’s very natural. And we want our foster carers to feel that way. We don’t want to interfere in their life. We want to add\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod3\">The type of support Aberlour provides to foster families\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Grace, what kind of support do you, on a typical day, provide to foster families?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>All our social workers and service managers provide 24\u002F7 support. All foster carers get an on-call sheet every month, and we all take our rota. We’re all on a rota. So we’re there, just if there’s even someone to talk to, they’re not just phoning someone in a call centre. They’re phoning one of us. All the foster carers and all the team as well, we go out our way to have activity days, team days, and visits where we’re meeting all the foster carers so that they know us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>How many families at any one time could you potentially be in touch with?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>10 – 12, but I could also be in touch with the whole group of them, depending. If I just want to pass over a certain message, I would just phone them all up individually. The same with Kerryanne, the same with any member of our team. Now I’ve got my own group of foster carers that I look after.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That’s not just for me. We look after everyone. That’s where we do the relationship model, where we look after everyone because everyone knows us. I might be on call, but it might not be one of my foster carers, but they know they can phone me and they can have a chat.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think that’s what makes us different from a local authority because they phone a call centre, whereas they’re phoning one of the team.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And then, obviously, you build up that relationship and know their needs and wants and sometimes the triggers or the things that you might have to step in and help out with.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes. Our foster carers, prior to coming on board, would do a specialised training which every fostering service does, which is Skills to Foster. I’m the main facilitator in that. So, one of the groups will help me, and that gives them an insight into fostering before they even start their journey. Quite a lot of people might say, “You know what, fostering it’s not for us”, or “Yes! I really want to go forward”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So that’s perfect. If you’re keen, on that 50\u002F50 fence, you’re not really sure what to do. You could still sign up to do Skills to Foster and go right through that journey. Then you’ll know, by the end of that, if it’s really something you want to take forward.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes. However, at the end of that journey, we can also say that we don’t think that fostering is really for you at this moment in time. Maybe you need to take a step back and maybe get some more experience in working with children because some foster carers come with no experience whatsoever of even child development.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So what can you do? Can you volunteer at Brownies? We’ve done that before. One of our foster carers went to be a school dinner lady so that she could get that experience of working with young children. So, we’re not saying “no”, we’re saying “take a step back, think about it, maybe get some experience and come back in three to six months’ time”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod4\">What Aberlour looks for in potential foster carers\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I want to try to get back to that “F” word you used.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The sweary word\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>No, not as much as we can be tempted sometimes. We are always very professional at Central FM, as you know. \u003Cem>[Laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>However, the “F” word you used was “fun”. I want to try and explore that a little bit because we all love having a bit of fun, and there are so many of the kids out there who need this help. Who just don’t get to experience enough of it. What kind of things are you always on the look for when the foster family comes forward?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, one thing that we can do is through the Skills to Foster, as well, is we play games. And it’s like fun games. Half the time, I make them up, and it’s just to see if they’ll actually join in because it’s really interesting to watch people really come out of their comfort zone. That’s what we’ll ask them to do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I just want to try and paint this picture. What kind of games are we talking? Twister levels, or is it Scrabble, or is it team building?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>No, it’s like team building activities plus as well, it can be silly games as well. Silly games, it’s like, “Come on, I’ll, I’ll show you what to do, stand up, sit down”. Or there’s, like, you go in a circle, somebody says, “Well, I don’t like this. Who else?” And then they change spaces, all this team building and fun games that you do as a team probably.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I guess we’re putting people out their comfort zone because they will be as foster carers. The child who is coming to live with them will be out their comfort zone as well. We’re keen on trying to see how people adapt and cope. The fun element beside that is because we’re such a small team and know each other really well. Again, we pride ourselves on having that fun not only as a team but with our foster carers and, more importantly, the children alongside the foster carers and the birth children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod5\">Supporting families, birth children and fostering togetherness\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Because they are important. We have talked to foster families so far in our podcast series about the birth children who may be in these homes as well, who get cared for just as well as the foster kids do because they’re very important. What’s your experience and your side of that because we’ve heard ’s side , but what that involves from your side in terms of making those biological children who may be part of the house feel part of the fostering family?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I actually did a report, almost like a dissertation, I guess, into the experience of birth children in a local authority and our birth children within Aberlour fostering. And really, what came back is that Gill’s role as a family worker is key to the success of a child remaining in a family, and that really evidenced that children felt like having that own worker.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Having Gill, having someone to speak to. And take Grace, for example. When she visits a family, she’s there for the parents, the foster carers and the kids really, really felt that they were valued and they were still part of the family. They could experience having a chat with Gill, or Gill taking them for tea or going bowling and or whatever it was that the child wanted to do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Also, what we do is that Gill and Grace and other members of the team all organise fun activities specifically for the birth children. Sometimes it’s events where the birth children and foster children are together. Sometimes it’s two different events. It’s important to recognise that, like the carers have their carers group, the birth children have experience of their wee group as well. They’ve got, I suppose, like-minded, they’re maybe going through something similar that they can’t speak to an adult about. So, they’ve got the children that they can share with. And that’s been really successful. I think that’s been really lovely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our activities, people come along with the birth children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, and friends that are all invited, and everybody just becomes one big happy group. Now, you don’t know who’s fostered, who’s not. So that’s good as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think an example of that was our last Christmas party. You had a young lad that brought his girlfriend along to the Christmas party. You’ve got other young people that brought their friends along. Team members bring their own family along. What we wanted was to create a culture where everybody’s in it as one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It goes back to what I said earlier about it being a family. It was very much a family feel. It wasn’t about being part of Aberlour per se, but it was about being under the Aberlour umbrella, but actually just in it together and just being a family together rather than be fostered and or not fostered.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I know that’s a really important thing for the charity to get, to harness those feelings. How does it compare to any other roles you’ve had previously working for Aberlour? Have you had anything to compare it to in terms of those? Just try to capture them in nice family moments.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, we’re both ex-residential workers for Aberlour. We’ve worked in the children’s homes as well, and I think we just created that fun there as well because we would do events for the children and take them out to the park. We both went on holiday with the children and stayed in caravans.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’ve always had the fun element within Aberlour itself, and we’ve just carried on to the fostering, so it comes easy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think an important message for me has always been that I remember when I first started, I was told that once you’re part of Aberlour, you’re always part of Aberlour. That’s true for the staff. Obviously, Grace and I have been there for a long time. But more importantly, it’s there for our children, young people. We’ve got relationships with children and fostering and residential that have left.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One girl springs to mind. She left ten years ago. She’s now going to be 25. And we’re still we’re still in touch with her. She was at our Christmas party just past. So that’s really important for us. It’s something, again, to be really proud of is that we’ve fulfilled our promise to the kids and we’ve maintained a level of contact with them. They actually describe us as a family, which again is what we what we strive for because they’re a part of ours.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Myself and Gill, we visit a young lad who was in residential, then fostering, and now is out on his own. He’s 27 now, and we still meet him for dinner, and he phones sometimes or texts when he’s maybe needing a bit more extra help. So, we were able to provide that as well through Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod6\">More ways Aberlour support foster families financially and in general\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One of the things we’ve discussed on other podcasts, and if you’ve not heard them yet, you can go and listen to some of your actual live foster families who are doing this amazing work at the moment. You can hear their take on this. One of the big questions, as I know this is quite important for you guys to get across as well, is that financial support that Aberlour provides when it comes to maybe making those decisions to give up a career or looking at childcare arrangements within your own household.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Maybe you’re looking to change your work-life balance. As many people have been over the last couple of years, given everything the world has been through. How does that financial support work? Is it means tested in any way, and without going into too much detail, is it enough for someone to actually choose a career to replace a big income with, you could actually do that as your day-to-day?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. If anyone had any questions regarding our fees and allowances, they’re quite clearly on our website. So I direct any potential carer to our website.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Just to explain a fee, as our fee is your like your salary for caring for the child. Then you have a maintenance allowance, which is a child maintenance allowance. So, anything that covers household, clothing, food, shelter, everything like that is covered within there. I would say it’s quite a substantial figure, and hopefully, it feels that would cover all costs in terms of for the child that’s moving in. And also for the carer for their fee, we also do a start-up cost as well. Specific to each family, there’s an allowance to set out for things. For example, a bed or cupboard or anything that child would need, a TV, etc. And again, we’re a bespoke service. We are open to foster carers coming to us and letting us know if there’s anything specific to a child’s needs that they would need. We would review that and fund where we can.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What we’ve got to do, I suppose, is inform our foster carers that they are self-employed. I think that’s a big thing for them as well because they are leaving a job. Although we do sort of say if you can take a career break, take out a career break for six months to a year. Because then, if it’s not for them, they can always go back. That’s really important to see if they can manage to do that as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think we really understand that just now, over the cost of living crisis, that that’s a real challenge for people and might deter people from applying to foster. What we’d say is, really, direct you to the website and have a look at the figures and you would be able to answer those questions for yourself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But equally, there’s a potential that once a child is settled, we do have foster carers at work after a period of time. So you could foster and also maybe work part-time or whatever fits in with the child’s life as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, if you listen to our podcast with David and Jacqui. Jacqui’s certainly one who’s just went back to work part-time again. You can see that on our website as well if you want to hear a bit more about how that works and the story there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There are so many options. I think one of the real key things as well. If people think, “Well, if I’ve got a kid”, it’s a full-time job, albeit self-employed, as you explained there. But maybe that’s just more of the nuances, the financial side of it. But it’s still a full-time thing, essentially. But you do get a break because you’ve got all those amazing members of the team who are standing by, so foster carers get that wee break they need as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would also encourage people to ask about fees and allowances and not feel, I know that people feeling quite shy or a challenge about that or feeling that they shouldn’t ask. But I do feel that is something that carers or potential carers have a right to know what they should be getting paid for caring for a child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>No one is going to judge you if you ask questions because they are very key questions to ask. It’s going to have an effect on your household budgets and everything like that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For you guys, do you guys see yourself working at Aberlour forever the way it stands? Without putting any pressure on you in case your bosses are listening. But everybody I’ve met so far seems to really enjoy their job, as one of the things I would take away from the series so far.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think if we didn’t enjoy it, we would have moved a long time ago. I mean Aberlour as a whole. I’ve been in different roles in Aberlour. I’ve been a relief worker right at the start, then I’ve been a residential worker, then I’ve been a social worker, and it’s been through Aberlour that I’ve become a social worker because they put me through university. That’s why I’ve got the role I’ve got today. I mean, I’m a lot older than Kerryanne, so I’ve only got two years and ten months to go. So I can’t see myself moving on.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So that’s why she’s so happy today. I thought it was Central FM teas and coffees, but actually, the countdown is on. \u003Cem>[Laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think if I wasn’t happy in my role, even in my different roles, I would have moved a long time ago. It’s not just the team around me. I think it’s been working with the children and young people because we’re still in touch with a lot of them that we worked with when they were six years old. And now, I mean, I went to one of their weddings. It’s that relationship that we have with them, that doesn’t go away and some have moved on, but some have sort of clung to you as if “I want to keep in touch”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There’s just a definite air of positivity in everything we’ve been doing so far. I think that’s kind of what you really want to translate into the foster carers that you take on board. You want them to come on that same way and feel the same way as you guys feel.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. Our goal is long-term permanent foster carers for the children. The children have been there six, eight, ten, twelve years. We’ve got children or young people, I should say, who are still with the families but not in foster care. They live there. That’s their home. They’re now 23. So that is their home for until they move on to their own place. Some of them, I don’t see that ever happening. However, they’re still there. And the family, they are their son or, the sister, or a brother, that’s where they are.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The crucial thing is you guys are there to help them get to that point. Even in the worst cases, if it has broken down and doesn’t work again, you’re there to help in those scenarios as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’re there to support foster carers because it’s devastating for them when that placement breaks down, and the child has to move on. Because they love the child, but for whatever reason, the child can’t stay there and has to move on. It’s devastating. And it’s for us to pick them up so that they don’t give up and they’re able to move on.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And I think it’s devastating for us as a team when it doesn’t work because we do care. We put a lot and take a lot of pride into our job, and it is like a family. When someone leaves that family, it’s upsetting for everyone. But our job is to support our foster carers through that and obviously the child that is moving on and do the best that we can.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod7\">Final note on who we are looking for in foster carers and what makes Aberlour unique\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I just want to round off the chat, really just to kind of recap again on the matching side of things at that very start of the fostering journey. I was going to ask if you could between you come up with five of your most important things that you look for in a fostering family when they come forward. Take your time. Just even five key elements. You’re looking for fun, we’ve covered so that’s one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I suppose it’s a motivation as well because everybody has a different motivation of why they’re coming forward. Whether it’s through their own personal journey or they’ve read an article. Some of them come through because they’re having a complete career break. We’ve had some who have lost their jobs and then re-evaluate. “What can we do? You know what I’ve always fancied? Fostering. This is the ideal opportunity.” So they come from all different reasons.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And what else are you looking for, Kerryanne, in a foster family normally?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would say that again. Maybe what makes us different to other agencies is that we keep an open mind. We’ve had foster carers that have come on board to us, have maybe been refused elsewhere because they’re maybe like a single carer or have no child care experience. But we’ve really explored other ways to help and support prior to the assessment stages.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I guess, for me, it’s as a team, keeping that open mind when someone’s coming forward and having the ideas that what that person’s got to offer based on them, not necessarily just because they’re in a relationship, or because of the work that they do. I think everybody’s got something to offer a child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So that’s a good question to ask then because you’re basically saying to me, “Actually, we don’t actually work like that so much. We’re very open-minded. So, if you’re not sure, just try and ask us and go through the process”. If you think you really want to do this, you guys will try to make it happen as best you possibly can.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Definitely, I think it’s understanding that it’s not the easiest of tasks to do. It’s going to be a hard road ahead. However, You have a team of people that’s very experienced around you that genuinely cares and wants to support you through that process as best as we can. What I would say as well about our service is that short breaks necessarily have to be with a carer as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We offer different kinds of breaks. We’ve got children attending team ranch, we’ve got to do different activity based. It goes back to being unique and bespoke in terms of fitting alongside what’s best for the child and what’s going to work for that family. So again, it goes back to what I said earlier about discussing that with your worker and putting your views across what’s best for your child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, we’ve got one child up north, and they go to horse riding for their short break. It gives foster carers three to four hours to themselves while she’s away to horse riding, and we pay for that. As Kerryanne said, there’s different ways. It’s not about short breaks going to somebody’s house. It’s about activities as well that they can get involved in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, that fun factor that you’ve mentioned so many times, I feel like, guys, we can actually get through another podcast where we just have a laugh and talk about loads of other things because you guys have been quite good fun.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Grace\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’ve been around the houses.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>[Laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>No, no, I just mean in general. I can tell you’ve enjoyed being on here. There’s maybe a wee comedy duo slot in Central FM at some point in the future for both Kerryanne and Grace, social worker and Kerryanne, of course, the service manager at Aberlour. It’s been a real pleasure having you guys in here today. And I hope the tea and coffee was a very high standard.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Kerryanne\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It was, thank you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’re welcome back anytime.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering team, Kerryanne & Grace - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FAberlour-GraceAndKerryanne.jpg",{"id":169,"author_id":19,"slug":170,"is_featured":7,"title":171,"content":172,"content_overview":10,"published_at":158,"seo_title":173,"seo_description":10,"image":174,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},11,"podcast-meet-single-foster-parent-sarah","Fostering Podcast: Meet single foster parent Sarah","\u003Cp>\u003Cem>Originally recorded Q1: 2023 with \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.centralfm.co.uk\u002F\">Central FM – The Forth Valley’s Local Radio Station\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cul>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod1\">Introduction to Sarah\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod2\">Sarah’s journey to becoming a foster carer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod3\">Preparing to welcome a child into your home\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod4\">The importance of making good memories\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod5\">Future plans as a foster carer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod6\">How does Aberlour support foster carers financially?\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003C\u002Ful>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod1\">Introduction to Sarah\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hi, it’s Liam from the Central FM Breakfast Show as we continue our series on Focus on Fostering with Aberlour Fostering, and really pleased for our latest guest to be with us here today. As we look at something a wee bit different in terms of fostering, you might have some preconceptions, maybe even misconceptions, about a typical foster family and what that looks like.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Really pleased to have Sarah with us today for episode two. Tell us a wee bit more about your set-up, Sarah. Thank you for joining us today.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hi. Thank you so much for having me. I’m delighted to be here.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Before we actually hear a bit more about you’re fostering journey as such. Tell us a bit about yourself, maybe your family background. Things that you did before you became a foster carer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So I originally grew up in Edinburgh, and I have four brothers, and I went on to initially train as a dietician, but prior to that, I always knew that I loved kids. I used to do lots of babysitting, I did a few jobs where I worked as a nursery school assistant before I started uni, and then I did my training as a dietitian.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And while I did that, I got also a little bit into the publishing side of things. And cut a long story short, I did go on to do publishing, and I worked for a children’s publisher. I’ve done quite a range of different things, and falling from that when I met my then-husband, we had started to try to have a family, and that didn’t happen for us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But what came out of that was just a real door opening when we at that time considered the possibility of adoption. And so that’s what I suppose you could say started me really on the journey of eventually what became fostering for me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And how long ago did you begin fostering?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So I got placed, and this is my first placement, last April, just about coming up for the year.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod2\">Sarah’s journey to becoming a foster carer\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Now, tell us about the experience that you’ve had and that process. I know there’s lots to get through. If you listen to a lot of the episodes in the podcast, you’re going to go into a lot of detail with those processes. But how did you find that process of becoming a foster carer with Aberlour?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Erm, well, I have to say I found it all very positive and very, in some ways, very straightforward. It’s very involved because you have to also consider the nature of what you’re doing. They do obviously have to do very thorough checks, but I think the important thing to always keep in mind is the reason why they do need to do that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Obviously, that’s very important, and I always just kept my eye on the end goal. And that was to always keep in mind I’m doing this for a very good reason, and it’s something that I really want to do. Yes, you can have definite moments where it can feel quite tough when sometimes you feel you’re going through the wringer. Because it’s a bit like turning a stone up and everything underneath looked at with a great big magnifying glass.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think the important thing to remember is it’s not anyone that really wants to overly focus on you as a person as such. It’s just people just really do need to get a true flavour of who you are. And also, through you going through the process, you are proving to not only yourself but to everyone else. You are completely committed to do whatever it takes to become a foster carer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You know, I think it’s really interesting to speak to you, Sarah, because you are a single foster parent, and do you think that process for you would have been any more tough because of that? Or do you think that was broadly similar to what a family of mum and dad were going through? Or do you find those checks were maybe a little bit more thorough for you as a single parent potentially?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I can only compare it for my journey, obviously, because I haven’t done it from the onset with a partner, but I don’t feel, for me, it’s felt like it would have been any different than it would have been for a couple. If you’re doing it as a couple, obviously, each partner needs to go through the same assessment.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But yes, I still found it for me, it felt to me like I was just being treated the same as I would anyone else that chose to do such a thing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Did you learn quite a lot through the experience of becoming a foster carer?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes, I think life as we know it, you’re always learning things about yourself, and it’s always good to really dig deep and self-reflect. I think partly because of the nature of my previous jobs when I’ve worked as a dietitian, that’s been in the NHS, and I’ve worked in a whole varied range of different situations within that, that in a way, it got me quite comfortable with looking at times quite “private” in individual circumstances.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think it’s a case of if you need to do that with other people, you also need to just be comfortable doing that with yourself. I suppose I’ve come from it with that viewpoint. So that, for me, is maybe made it perhaps slightly easier.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think one of the key things as well, when we’re exploring the fostering with Aberlour, is just the fantastic support that they’ve got. I think, particularly for you as a single foster parent, it must be a real peace of mind for you to know that there’s such a wealth of support available for you if you need an extra little bit of help when things maybe get a wee bit challenging at home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, no, absolutely. I mean, I think there’s been two sides that I found to this. One side talking about support, when I have let people know that I was wanting to go down this route, I’ve had nothing but amazing positive support from my own personal side of, whether it’s been, family or friends. Then, of course, with Aberlour too, they have just been amazing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And I found them the moment I contacted them, actually, I had someone get back to me immediately. I had a really extensive chat with someone from Aberlour at the time, and they just left it with me. They gave me the information but enabled me to go away and have a good think about it and be able to come back to them and take things from there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So I’ve had nothing but a positive experience from Aberlour from the moment I first contacted them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod3\">Preparing to welcome a child into your home\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You first contacted them, and you went through the process and everything. We’ve spoken before on previous episodes about maybe six to nine months is about the average it takes to actually complete that process and get it sorted out. But you’ve had your own little personal journey at home to get your house ready for your foster daughter coming to join you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I did, yes. It wasn’t originally the plan, I’ve got to say, but I think partly the reason with COVID kicking in, and I just had that bit more time to reflect on it. I just thought, I’d got a lovely rescue greyhound, and I thought my previous place I lived in just didn’t feel like it was a very practical set-up anymore.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As much as I loved it, and I just thought, “Well, I’m in this for the long haul. I’m fully committed to it.” So, I thought, “Why not? Let’s just make my situation work for the place I’m at now.” Moving house is never a pain-free or easy thing to do. But I’m so glad I’ve done it because it’s just amazing to now live in a place that does absolutely suit for what I’m doing. I love it, and I know my wee girl that’s with me now and dog, each of them have got their own beds now. So there everyone’s a happy customer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As a dog lover myself with my wee frenchie at home, I can’t imagine being without her now. We got her just before the pandemic, and she’s just a totally huge part of the family now for us all. How did that work, and to greeting your daughter to life with a dog? Because that might be a scary thing for some people to think about.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Oh, they’re going to get on with my dog ok?” and I take it that’s something that had to be checked out?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely. That’s a really, really good point. The one key top tip I would give for any prospective foster carers with pets or thinking about getting a pet before fostering. I would highly recommend, if they’re going to do that, to get the dog first and really allow a bit of time to let their dog get bedded in, and then bedded in with the dog as it were. The last thing you want is when you then get placed with the little one. Everything really does need to become about that one. You just don’t want to have to then contend with a dog that just needs a little bit of time and care also to get settled in, first of all. I would say that because I initially had this almost romantic vision that I would go to collect said dog with my newly placed lovely little foster one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But now, looking back, and I talked it through with various people at the time, and yes, it was more people who had already got dogs. They had recommended that, and they were absolutely right. I would also say in terms of little ones and dogs, actually for them, I think it’s an amazing thing. Or pets, generally, it can be.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>All I would say is you just need to be a little bit careful about who that little one might be coming through the door because some of them might not be good with pets. You just need to know that that’s going to be on an individual basis. It so happened that the lovely girl that I’ve been placed with, she absolutely loves dogs, but she’s maybe a little bit on the other end of that spectrum because I need to, or have needed to be a bit careful at times for her, just to allow the dog it’s space and not get too overly friendly. That’s also with other dogs too. I think the bottom line is it’s on an individual basis, but if you’re going to get a dog prior to fostering, get them bedded in first.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. Give yourself that break and that time. That, in fact, was advice given to us as well. We had a dog a couple of years before the wee one came along, who’s now 16 months and pulling her ears on the regular. Thankfully the dog loves her, and everything’s ok. But yes, good advice.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Any other preparations that you had to make? I mean, the moving house was quite a big preparation, to be honest. Is there anything else you had to get? Maybe any other changes in your life you had to make before your wee one came to join you?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The place that I ended up then moving into and buying it definitely needed work done upstairs, and that’s where all the bedrooms are. I ended up pretty much having to get that all gutted out before my little one, or I was ready to actually be placed with a little one. Obviously, that, I would say, are pretty exceptional circumstances. Most people already have their homes, and everything’s up and running. If that were the case for you, then you would just be looking to make sure you’ve got that room, that would be a good room for a foster child to be in and according to their age. So if they’re a little bit older, you’d maybe be looking for items, whether it’s books or toys, that are appropriate for that age or not.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You would also be advised by your social worker about that because we talk about age of a child, but with a child who’s come from a place of trauma, their actual chronological age and developmental age could be different, and that could be for different aspects within their life. So that’s also partly about getting to know the child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In a way, for me, I actually started off, even though I had the room all perfectly in my head kitted out for this little one coming, and I did in terms of all the interior and having it all nicely kind of decorated. I didn’t actually have an awful lot of stuff in terms of things like toys and lots of books. And that was probably no bad thing because anyone coming to you, they’re going to have their own things that they will bring with them. That are their belongings, and they need a place and a space to be able to put those. So I think it’s important that they have the means to inhabit the space for themselves. And over time, as you get to know them and they get to know you, you can start then figuring out, “Oh, I know they like this, we don’t have that. Let’s get some of that”, and then build as you go along.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod4\">The importance of making good memories\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, you touched on there what the journey may look like for some of these foster children. In many cases, there’s maybe trauma involved, there’s been issues as they’ve had to turn to foster care to hopefully try and make a better future for themselves. That’s where you and people at Aberlour come and to try and help. I know this is something you really, really enjoy doing. How important is it to try and replace that trauma that you speak of with some really good memories for these children instead? I know you’re very, very keen on making sure they’ve got really good memories going forward from the time with you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. So creating good memories. In a very simple way, anything positive that you do with a child that comes to you is only a good thing. Maybe people have this image of, “You need to take a child to Disneyland, Paris Disneyland”, or something really exotic or amazing. Actually, it’s you, first and foremost, giving that child such a simple message of, “I’m so happy you’re here.” I know this is not an easy moment because there’s so many changes for everybody. But when you find your time to get bedded in, you’ll find that that little one, when they see how much you’re there for them, that’s when your journey really starts.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That can just simply be about going down to the beach. It can be going exploring maybe the area that you live. You got to remember that little ones coming to you, and they’re not necessarily going to know where you live. And that in itself, imagine if that was you. That’s going to feel very scary. So you just go and have a wee walk, go and check it out together, maybe set some things aside that could be new things for all of you, then it’s on equal terms for you all. You’re all exploring some new things. The one thing that I’ve learned from Aberlour, I think, and it makes perfect sense when you first get placed with a little one, you don’t want to go overboard with this idea of all of a sudden “let’s just conquer the world in a day”. Give everybody time and space and you’ll find your natural kind of peace with that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One other thing I would say with that is it’s also important to remember that you might have your vision of what might make a great memory or be a positive thing for that little one. But that actually might be something that could potentially induce anxiety for them if it’s something that they’re just not familiar with or used to. That’s something that I think in time, you can just gradually start to gauge that and just go with what feels right for you, for your situation.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Just on that, and in trying to find those little nuggets that they’re going to cling on to and really enjoy. The guys at Aberlour and your social worker, and people who support there will do as much work as they can to steer you in the right direction for each little one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. I think if you love kids, you will instinctively find that in time anyway. I think a good anchor for that to start off with is you’ll find that out before that little one comes to you. You might hear a few key things, like they like a particular place to go and enjoy a nice meal. Or they like to go to see a duck pond or something. Those are kind of some helpful things to know about. You can either think, “You know, let’s go and do that”, or “Let’s go and see the same thing but in our area”, that kind of thing. But in terms of creating memories, I think once things get a bit more settled, you just think of it every day.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’re making memories because you’re making a new family life together, and that’s a pretty awesome thing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’ve got some little memory booklets on to go with this as well. Is that part of that experience for her as well? You can look back in later life and even remind yourself of all these amazing times she had with you particularly as well?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, definitely so. Various people encourage and suggest different things. I’ve heard in the past this idea that you can keep a memory box, and it’s like effectively like a shoe box that you go out for a nice walk, and you collect pebbles or stones, or whatever, feathers, or you have some nice photos in it. I know my little one does have some of those. She’s kept a pair of her really, really old trainers, but they were from another previous foster family. They clearly really had strong significance for her.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What I have done, because I’ve only fairly recently been placed with my little one, is I’ve really been keeping quite a close eye, taking lots and lots of photos over this year of all the kind of fun and interesting things we’ve done and made wee notes. And bit by bit, I’m compiling like a little book for her, and I’ll do it. I’ll keep it for this year, particularly with lots and lots of pictures and things, because I feel like this is a particular moment to really be like, “Look at what we’ve done.” “This is just the start of our journey.” And I think realistically, as time goes on, I’ll probably not have quite as much capacity to keep doing that. I think my little one would need this room the size of a library to be able to hold such stuff. It will probably come a bit more simplified in times, but it’s just having some kind of a record. Just like you would if it was your own biological children. You’d want them to have like a family photo album they could always look at.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod5\">Future plans as a foster carer\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely. But what does the short and long term look like for your wee one at the moment, if you don’t mind me asking? Have you got any plans? Do you take a week, a month, a year at a time? How does that work? Even in your head, are you planning your own life? How far ahead are you thinking about in terms of your relationship with your wee one at the moment?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Oh, well, I see this for life. As far as I understand, my little one she’s going to be with me, all being well, till adulthood. For me, I would see it as a continuing journey from then on anyway. I think that’s also a particularly really important reason of why I felt I wanted to go with Aberlour because that’s what they particularly do specialise in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Fostering is such an individual journey for everybody. You do obviously have the option of doing shorter-term placements for children. But I always knew for me that for anyone coming to me. I just wanted to know that I would be able to have them for the entirety, as it were. That’s just what I was looking for.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod6\">How does Aberlour support foster carers financially?\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We touch on this in really great detail in episode one of our series on the Central FM website, but I’m keen to get your thoughts on it. As a single foster parent, how does the financial side of being a foster carer work for you? I know that Aberlour do support really well on that front, but how do you find it as a single parent?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I got to say. I find it fantastic because that’s what it enables me to be able to do this. Every month you get two different payments, one’s a fostering fee, and so that’s for your input as a carer. And then you also get what I’d consider a very generous allowance, for maintenance of your little ones covering all sorts of things. Whether that be for the food, for any schooling-related things, clubs. Might go to clothes, food, holidays, all that kind of stuff. You will definitely find, over the course of time, a child brings with him or her lots of stuff you need to get for them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Particularly as they get older. More friends, and they do other things as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. What I have found about my journey so far is it’s been so liberating to know that I’ve been able to do this because I have the means to do it from a financial point of view. For example, unlike adoption in that sense, you wouldn’t have that means, and it’s not only that, you also do get the ongoing support and really very fantastic ongoing support with my little one. I’ve also forged a really, really great relationship with her social worker.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think for me, and maybe particularly as a single carer, it feels really positive to have such an extensive support network. A good friend of mine, they did adopt a little boy, and as far as I understand, after the initial everything went through, they kind of have been pretty much left to it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s just for me that’s been a really great positive.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>On that note, would you describe this as “a job” or as it may be “the best job in the world”? Which one would you choose? \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Ooh, that’s a hard one because I think it falls in both camps. I would never, ever say to my little one, refer to it as that because I am to her first and foremost to her mum. And that’s exactly how I feel about it. There are, however, aspects to it that are definitely a job, and they require time, input, careful thought and consideration.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Things like, as a carer, we need to submit a monthly report, kind of just summarising what’s been happening in that month. We need to be available to attend meetings and multi-disciplinary meetings. I’ve had quite a kind of strong involvement with the school that my little one goes to again for helping to get herself settled in. Any ongoing things that just needs a bit of support and input. So it’s never something that you switch off from, and it most definitely is a commitment. I think if so long as you’re focused, and you’re in it for the long haul, everything else finds its place within that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s been great catching up today, Sarah. I just wanted to kind of wrap up by just asking you for one final piece of positivity and advice for a single person out there who, male or female and all walks of life, you know, it doesn’t have to be what you might perceive as the standard family and that you might have a home. You are a shining light example of that. Just one piece of maybe positivity and encouragement for someone who’s maybe swithering over becoming a single foster carer. What would you say to them?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sarah\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would say just go for it. Absolutely. It’s the best thing I’ve probably ever done. Yes, it takes time and commitment. But the goal, the goal that you achieve at the end of it, as well as ongoing and the rewards you get from it, are just amazing. And I just can’t think of anything better that I could do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It just it gives you everything, and it needs an awful lot of thought and reflection and consideration too. But if you really want to do that and you want to give someone a loving home and change their life actually forever, and not just for them, but for you too, I just can’t think of a better thing to do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Fostering Podcast: Meet single foster parent Sarah - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FAberlour-Sarah.jpg",{"id":176,"author_id":19,"slug":177,"is_featured":7,"title":178,"content":179,"content_overview":10,"published_at":158,"seo_title":180,"seo_description":10,"image":181,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},12,"podcast-meet-our-fostering-couple-david-jacqui","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering couple, David & Jacqui","\u003Cp>\u003Cem>Originally recorded Q1: 2023 with \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.centralfm.co.uk\u002F\">Central FM – The Forth Valley’s Local Radio Station\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cul>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod1\">Introduction to David & Jacqui\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod2\">The F form experience\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod3\">The matching process\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod4\">The big reasons for fostering with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod5\">Work-life balance and being a male foster carer\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod6\">The finances in foster caring\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod7\">Other ways Aberlour supports their foster carers\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003Cli>\u003Ca href=\"#pod8\">A message to those thinking of signing up with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fli>\n\u003C\u002Ful>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod1\">Introduction to David & Jacqui\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Hi, I’m Liam from the Central FM Breakfast Show, and I’m really, really happy to be focusing on fostering on our latest podcast series at Central FM. Our first episode is chatting to David and Jaqui Adamson, who have been foster caring for quite some time now, and they’ve joined us today to tell us their story. How are you both?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Fine, thank you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Good, thank you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Nice to see you. You guys have lots of experience in foster care, which we’ll come and touch on very soon. I wanted to really start off and just get a wee background on you guys and what you’ve did before the world of fostering. What was the makeup of your family, your work and everything else that you were doing beforehand?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So prior to foster caring, I was a childminder and so had lots of little kids running about the house on a daily basis. I did that for about five or six years. Before that, I was a mortgage advisor with a large bank. My childcare kind of fell through when we had our little boy, and sadly my mum became ill. Which made me move on to “What can I do now to incorporate my own child care?” So, it was very much, “You know what? I’ll look after other people’s children for them”. As well as being able to look after my own son. At that point, I’ll pass over David, who worked away from home quite a lot with his job. He was a refrigeration\u002Fair conditioning engineer, and I’ll let you speak to him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’ve done that for too many years, and I went up the ladder a bit. I started working from home, and I was dealing a lot with the kids when I was about. So, it was nice seeing all the kids and seeing the child minding kids Jackie had grow up and dealing with them, dealing with their parents. It was enjoyable.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Then I just decided to… sorry, \u003Cem>we\u003C\u002Fem> decided to start in fostering. So we went through the process of becoming foster carers, and once that was all done, we’ve done some.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod2\">The F form experience\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Now through the F form, first of all, which is quite, quite intensive.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That process takes about to get through?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui                                 \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Six and nine months.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Not constant for nine months?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David and Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Oh no, no, no.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Obviously, there’s so many things that the guys are going to look at and learn about you. They’re going to want to learn about you and your family and the makeup of what you’ve got going on, your experience, and just what you’re like as people as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. The F form is really good for the whole family. But it’s also because we had a young son at that time that was well and truly involved in the whole process, which has to be because he’s coming into this journey with us as well. It’s not just myself and Jackie doing it, it’s our family. Even the grandparents were sort of involved in it as well. The child is coming in, or children are coming into your family, become part of your family. So, the whole family deals with everybody.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, because my mum and dad were interviewed. My brother was interviewed. But it’s not intense. It does take that six or nine-month process. You’ll maybe have a meeting one week, and then you’ll get some homework, finding out about your local area, what your local area can offer the children in that area for different clubs and things they’ve got on, and what type of community you live in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So yeah, it’s not, after a six months, Monday-Friday, intensive application or anything like that. We found it really good. You kind of find out about yourself as well. It goes right back to your childhood. How you were brought up? What schooling was like? Right the way through to marriages, broken marriages, exes. We used to always laugh with our social worker, virtually saying to her, “Like, you know what colour knickers we’ll be wearing” because they know so much about you, and you’re so open and honest.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The relationship you build up with the social worker that’s doing your F form, you’ve got to have a bond when you’re doing it with them. Because they are asking some awkward questions, some personal things. And if you’re just open and honest and quite happy, then it comes like a friend, to be honest with you, is dealing with your F form because she knows you inside out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod3\">The matching process\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Jacqui, I’ll ask you this question then. Just for someone like me who’s never went through this process before, tell us about that selection process and how it works, how matching with the right family works, and how important is getting that right.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. So basically, when you go through your F form and that social worker knows you inside out, gets to know your family, gets to know all your quirky wee traits, how your family operate and when they get referrals through from social work. They’ll have a look at the background of the family they’ll have… I mean, for instance, our boy is quite hyperactive. He’s quite out there. And I remember when we went through our F form, them saying, “You know, we don’t want to put a really highly strung kids in your household because then you’re going to have two kids bouncing off walls. And, you know, we’re going to look at more sombre children. And these can be children, you know, who have been neglected”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But then they bounce off our own son. He’ll sort of pull them out of that shell that they’ve maybe been placed in. So, they work really quite hard with you to get the right placement because you don’t want to have kids coming into a placement that doesn’t work. I think it’s also really important that if you don’t feel that child’s right for you, you say “no”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You could go, “Oh, my heart’s leading me here. That’s really cute. And I want that wee one”. If they’re not right for you, it’s absolutely fine to say “no”. Because, again, you don’t want that placement failing, and then that wee one’s got to go on another family. Again, the whole meeting up process, your whole matching process is that you might have that child, will maybe go meet at park, and then they’ll maybe come to your house. That’s given that we’ve all got time for that. Sometimes It doesn’t happen as easily as that. Sometimes it is a case of straight into your home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s loads of experience for you to meet the child first and to feel like you just another adult. To get the feel of that person, how you feel around them, how they feel around you. It can take a month. It could take a couple of months. Just to get these meetings matched up and to see the child come to your house, see how the child feels in your house, and how you feel with the child in your house. Which as Jacqui says, it’s…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sometimes we don’t have that luxury.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s got to be a good match for you because it’s upsetting for you as an adult, for the job you’re wanting to do, to look after a child. If it doesn’t match correctly, then that’s upsetting for everybody when it does break down, which nobody wants that to happen. So that’s why the matching process is such a thorough thing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s just to make things work the first time, the best they can. And at the end of the day, that could maybe last year, it could last for two years. It doesn’t mean to say that the placement is going to be forever because things, unfortunately, do happen.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I mean, even us down to our short break carers also get matched with the children because, again, they want to enjoy the short break. They’ll go and meet with the short break carer and get to know the child and saying, “I can deal with this child, and I like having them around the house, and the child likes to settle there as well”. Because, again, they’re only going there for maybe a week or a couple of days at a time and things. They need to be comfortable where they’re going, and I think that that’s really important to get it right for the child.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, definitely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod4\">The big reasons for fostering with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It shows you the lengths and the breadths that Aberlour go to to make sure that the right families are chosen for the children. They obviously need it. I know it was one of the main reasons you guys moved to Aberlour for fostering was that kind of family ethos that they have going to make sure that your family was looked after, not just of the kids coming into your care. It’s important that you guys were looked after and were integrated properly with the new kids that were coming in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It was night and day moving to The process of moving over with them was plain and simple. And from there, if you need something, if you want something, if you need help or just a chat.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think what the main reasons that we did move over was support for our own son. That was kind of lacking previously, whereas when we spoke to Aberlour, you could almost get that sense and that feeling that there was so much more support going to be in place for him. They really involve our son within everything that they do. He’s met a lot of the children that are in care in Aberlour, with other carers, and he gets invited on days out with them, and he’s also got his own family worker as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>He’s now 13. We know not all 13-year-olds want to speak to their parents about their troubles and strife. However, he’s got a fantastic relationship with his family worker. So, if he doesn’t want to talk to us about it. In fairness, he’s pretty good. He’s pretty level-headed. He will speak to us. But there is times that he is like, “Right, get my family worker on the phone. I want to speak to her”. You know, just to sit and have a chat. She’ll take him out for dinner, and they can have a wee chat and see what’s going on and see how the girls are getting on and, again, just how he’s coping.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It gives him that sounding board that’s not his parents. It’s not his family, school, whatever. It’s a wee bit further out that he can tell her how much they annoy him and what’s been going on. It’s really good to have that right through his whole childhood. In fairness, there’s no sort of any particular age that’s aimed at.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And it’s great for him to get about and see all the other kids as well, and feels part of the family helps him join in. It’s not just Mum and Dad’s job. It’s everybody’s together. The girls that they look after are part of our family as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour days out are for everybody. For the adults and for the kids. And it’s nice seeing them all mix.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David being the biggest kid there. \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It makes a good day out. Whether it’s go-karting, water skiing, climbing a hill, or doing anything. Just have a laugh. It’s what we’re all there for. Just let go and have a good day. And that’s what really, nine times out of ten times, happens.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod5\">Work-life balance and being a male foster carer\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You mentioned the “J” word there, the “job” thing. For people who are listening in and maybe thinking about doing what you guys did. And I’ve got a similar situation myself. The childcare costs are so astronomical now, and working from home has become a more popular thing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Maybe people look at their work-life balance after the last few years. How do you find your life balance is now, generally? As a couple, you’ve got all the kids, some of which have grown up now as well. But do you feel like it was the right decision for you guys?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely the right decision. When we first started talking about fostering, David was going to be staying at work. He was going to continue on with his career, and I was going to give up the childminding, and the fostering would be my, what we call the “main job”, would have been mine.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>However, as it happened, David was getting to an age that it was like, “You know, do I want to keep going with the same career?” He went through a particularly difficult stage at work. Then we decided at that point, “Actually, why don’t you give up?” And I would continue on. I continued for a little while with childminding, but it really didn’t mix, so I’ve now got another part-time job. I do two 10-hour shifts a week, which gets me out the house. David does everything to do with foster caring within the house. I obviously will come along when my shifts allow.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David deals a lot with all the hearings, with the meetings that go on with the girls social worker. And I think I’ll let you talk a bit about that. Just being in the male side of the caring. You know, everybody expects that females will be in the childcaring and they’ll look after the children, whereas David’s very much the househusband, the dad at home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, it’s fine. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it. It’s been a change in career, an eye opener, a big learning curve. Overall, and even through Aberlour now, I’m on the foster panels for foster carers who were foster carers or new foster carers coming in. The knowledge that I’ve got can help them as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’ve been doing that for a couple of years now, the hearings and that. Yes, the role mainly, sometimes, is “women orientated”. But there is more carers. Aberlour has carers meetings for them to meet up once a month just to air your s, find different strategies and just to get together and talk. If you’re having problems, then advice from longer carers or just different ideas. Just a bowl to put a pot in to try and help each other.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think even at the beginning, there was a lot of talk, like when you had one of the girls in hospital a lot. She was in and out for skin conditions, and all sorts and a lot of people were quite surprised. “Oh, you’re like the main… like you’re caring for this one, but you’re a man?”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There’s a lot of nice comments from the hospitals or whatever department of the NHS professionals I was dealing with regarding the girls. It was nice comments, and from that point of view, it sort of settles you. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve worked with the females and other things in my areas of my job. So it’s not an issue for me. But yeah, the stigma of “it’s got to be a woman”, and when you do come in, and I’ve been through The Fostering Network meeting different male carers as well and from the west, from east, from north. They’ve sort of had the same sort of stigma, and it was nice to discuss all these sorts of things, but it’s not a bad stigma. It’s just the stigma.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod6\">The finances in foster caring\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>No, you’re right. It’s a good thing to bring up, actually, because I know for a fact that Aberlour are very much open to all different types of parents. It could be single parents, same-sex parents as well, right across the board.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Just while we talk about the job side of things, I just want to touch on the finances a little bit with you both because also that is a big consideration. It may be an awkward topic for some people who are maybe thinking about this move, that just don’t want to ask the question because they might think it rude to ask, “How much I’m going to get?”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They might be thinking the people at Aberlour think, “They just want the cash”, you know, “they’re not interested in the kids”. But actually, it’s a very, very important point. You guys have to think about it very carefully. You were replacing your incomes from your jobs. You need to make sure you’ve got enough money coming in, both for yourselves as a family, but also, to look after the new kids who are going to be joining the family. Aberlour are fantastic at this because you get your fee on top of all the allowances and stuff for that as well. So it does seem like it’s very well set up to allow you to make that decision.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Definitely, I think Aberlour’s route around that is very much that we were always told, “We’re looking at one of you at least, sort of, giving up your job”, and they recognise that you’re that full income down, with an extra one to possibly even three bodies to feed and clothe and look after.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The fee will virtually replace a decent salary. Then you get your allowances that are for that feeding, watering, looking after, and clothing. Our two go to different clubs. They go horse riding, the swimming and have lots of out-of-school activities. Again, that allowance covers that quite easily, doesn’t it? It’s replaced your salary.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We replaced my salary with what we get from Aberlour. Not everything, but it was enough.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod7\">Other ways Aberlour supports their foster carers\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Let’s talk a wee bit more about that kind of day-to-day support that Aberlour helps out with. Of getting those tricky moments when the children come through your doors over the years. I know they’ve got so many different ways where you can literally just pick up the phone, and they are there for you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You can pick up the phone. They’ll come and see you, and you don’t have to make it a serious thing. You can meet them for a cup of coffee. You can meet them going for a walk if there’s things to talk. Our social worker knows us as well, she knows the girls well, and she knows Sam well. To be honest with you, she’ll read you from walking in the door how you are.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It can be even something as simple as if you are… and I hate calling it “a crisis moment”, but you know, we call it “a hiccup”. I don’t like “crisis”. We like “hiccups”. If you are at any point that you’re like, “I need a bit of support here”. It can just be a case of picking up the phone, and they’ll speak to the wee one. They’ll get them laughing, or I’ll get them joking, or they’ll let the child hear it from a different perspective.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sometimes you can get yourself so deep into it that you can get a bit overwhelmed and like, “Where am I turning next? What do I do now? You know what, I’m going to pick up the phone this time.” A lot of the time, you’ll sit back an hour, a day, a week later, and you go, “Gee-whiz, what was all that about?”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David and I work really quite well together, and the fact that I can see when David’s at tipping point. It’s like, “Stand back, I’m going to take over”, and comes that fresh brain in to say, “Right. We’re going to deal with it slightly differently”. We’re always coming up after the events with, “Right, do you know what? Maybe next time we should try it this way. This time, we’ll try it that way”. But, all that comes from your carers’ meetings, it comes from your social workers, the girls’ social workers.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“This is what we had.” “This is how we dealt with it.” “It didn’t actually work that time.” “You know, next time, we’re going to try it.” We’ve come up with quite a few different strategies, whether that’s been going for a drive in the car. Kids love to talk when they’re in the car because there’s no face-to-face contact.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’ve got an almost 13-year-old and a baby at the same time, so both ends of that, and the car works for both.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That’s been good. She’ll go to sleep. He’ll blether away about what’s bothering him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. But there’s, there’s no sort of face-to-face.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The eye contact bit.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And it’s like, don’t feel so intimidated. It’s just, “Actually, you know what? We’re going to go for a drive.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And I’m the same as you as much as I’ve got my own 13-year-old son. I’ve got my two girls, I’ve now got my granddaughter as well. So I have the whole age group.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The whole shebang.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The whole deal.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Can I just take your numbers on speed dial for future reference? \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>24-hour pickup. \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And you could be my buddy, actually. \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But overall, we do talk at night and are thinking different things, do a lot of research on training for what issues the girls have. We hand over to Aberlour if we can’t find enough. Kerryanne, one of the supervisors, has searched for us for stuff. She found it, we go on the course. And the loop of training there is, the door is always open for training. If you can find it yourself, or Aberlour have offered it because emails are sent out on different training for different things. So overall…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>So overall, and there’s no pressure, I know a lot of people think, “Oh my God, I’m going to spend my days training”. There’s no pressure. There’s a lot of training that’ll come up that we’ll look at and say, “Actually, no, that’s not for us”. That’s absolutely fine. But you do get a bit sucked into it. I really need to know about this, and I really need more about that. And again, it’s a case of sending an email saying, “Right, tell me about this”. And always there to say, “Right. We’ve got a course here running that day, can you make it?” or some of it’s just from home, some of its webinars. So again, it is at your pace.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’ve talked about that learning curve there. That’s learning on the job, I suppose, if you want to call it that too. You’ve also said you’ve learned loads about yourselves through the process, especially that initial sign-up phase and learning about your background and your history. What would be the overriding feelings you would say about your fostering journey entirely?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>How would it make you feel when you look back at everything you’ve achieved with the young people that have lived with you?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely. I would say incredible because there can be really tough moments, and there can be I’m not I’m not going to lie, but there are times that you’re just like, “I don’t know if I can do this anymore”. And then you look back, and you think, “Actually, you know, it’s not these kids’ faults”. Take a breath. Look at what they were like that day they walked through your front door, and look at what they were like two years ago. Look at what they’re like now. We’re now six years down the line. Massive difference. You look back and think, “Yeah, you can pat yourself on the back”. So, it is really rewarding. You can pat yourself on the back and say, “Actually, you know what? That was down to us. Down to us as a family.” Not saying singlehandedly. Yes, with support. Our two are thriving now. Even though, don’t get me wrong, they absolutely still have their issues. It’s not a quick fix overnight or in five years or ten years. They’ll always have those issues. But to see just how far they’ve come, and I think also looking on the other side, where they would be had they not come into looked-after care, and would be a completely different story. It’s almost like the sliding doors of life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2 id=\"pod8\">A message to those thinking of signing up with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For someone listening to this right now who’s maybe on the fence. What would you say to them about signing up with Aberlour?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely. Do it. You know, again, it’s not, “Oh, my God, if I sign up, that’s me. I’ve got to do this”. There’s loads of stages in between the two.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There’s lots of stages and Skills to Foster, which is a really good course to do. You have to do it anyway, but it’s a really good course. We’ve been in a few with new people coming in, and we’ll tell how it is. We’ll not put nice flowers and all that around it. We’ll tell you what it’s like being a foster carer. Yes, it is hard, it is testing. Yes, you have upset days. Yes, you have great days. But again, there’s no difference for, and I hate to use the word, “normal” children and having foster children, that’s just different.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah, that’s true. Family has its up and downs.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yeah. And at the end of the day, again, when I have a bad day, and the girls go to school, or Jacqui is at work, or my son’s at school, you have your own time, a bit of time out. You decide what you want to do, but yes, there is times it’s been to the hilt. Me personally, I look back at the photos from when they first came to where they are now. And I think, “Yeah, we’re doing something right here, and we’re doing well”. And it’s not just us. It’s everybody.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think it’s also important to mention as well that we have a short break carer as well, and the girls have individual short-break carers. Again, you’re thinking about it, you’re thinking, “Will I do this? This is going to tie my whole life up. I’m never going to get a holiday again. I might not be able to take this child out the country”. Yes, you can. You know, don’t be put off by it. I’ve got this 24-hour childcare that I’ve got to be there 24 hours. And currently, we have one weekend in a month and virtually minimum. And just like any other child would do, they would go to granny’s for the weekends, or they would go to Aunty Jo’s for the week.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You need a break.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Absolutely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>And Aberlour, I’ve got to say, are very, very good at almost making you have a break. You’ll be able to go on a holiday with your own child for a week or, you know, it’s not just a weekend. If you’re going on a fortnight’s holiday or you have something planned.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We’ve got carers there. Equally for times of “crisis”, we don’t like “crisis”, but you know, if it does get to the point that there is a crisis point – off they go to their short break carer, but that short break carer thought “oh my God, I’m going there because I’ve been really bad and I’ve done this, and I’ve done that”. It’s just I’m going for a rest.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our girls will actually say, “I can’t wait to go for another wee rest, and they enjoy it”. It’s all part of it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Of course, they’re all part of the Aberlour family as well, aren’t they?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>They see each other on all the days out and whenever we meet up. You didn’t just hand them at the door and go away again. It’s like, going and walking to come visit you. You come in, you visit, you have a blether, you talk about life and then you go away.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s been a real lovely chat. Is there anything else you guys want to say just to, really, you know, I don’t want to use “convince” because I think if you want to be a foster carer, you probably already really want to do it to an extent? The finances, or the things you’ve touched on a lot already. Is there anything else you want to add that might just help someone make that decision?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If your mindset is there for doing it, do it. It’s a rewarding job.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Ask all the questions. Don’t be afraid to ask financial questions. We still have to have a living, you’re feeding extra children, you’re looking after them, and you need to know that these finances are going to work for you because then that, I think that’s quite a big thing. People are always very much “Oh well, will we have enough money to be able to do this, to be able to do that”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Ask all these questions. Don’t be afraid, because believe me, they’ll ask you a lot more than you’re going to ask them and do a Skills to Foster course. Again, that gives you a really good insight and will tell you the horror stories. It will tell you what children have gone through in the short lives before you take them on.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At that point, you might think, “Wait a minute. I’m not quite ready for this”. So, again, I think definitely go in, ask the questions. I would say most definitely do the Skills to Foster. It’s two or three days out of life and or two or three evenings that you’ll go and you’ll do it. And again, that’s also really helpful for making that final decision.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>But you’ve got to remember as well, it’s still a job you’re doing. So you need to realise that as much as you’re being a loving, caring parent to children that need help, it’s still a job. And that’s what you’ve got to look at. It’s a very rewarding job. And so the point is how children come to you and rely on you. Whether the children are with you for the rest of their life, for six years or ten years, you’re only doing what you can do to help them to the best that you can.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Within that time frame.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>That time frame that you have them to make them better than what they walked in your front door.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Well, you can see them from both of you guys. You were in a really decent job at the time you were working. Trying to get childcare sorted and stuff as well. But you guys made that decision, and as you can see from both of you, that it’s been a great decision.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Oh, yeah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I can tell by being in your company.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Definitely, it’s not something I would say of I’ve regretted. And it’s been more enjoyable since we’ve moved to Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>David loves a chat at the school gate with the mums. He’s like the biggest busybody there. \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There’s dads there as well. You’ve got to remember there’s dads there as well. But it’s good, as from my point of view, as a male. It’s not the stigma it’s made it to be. There is a lot of males out there that do it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>A lot of people admire you for what you do as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I look at it no different to looking after your own children. And the point of that, as I say, I do a lot of the meetings. I was never out of the hospital the first year the children came. The amount of people that were in the meetings I used to go to, I’m down to next to nothing. And nothing to do with it, but the girls’ social worker is a male, and at school, he even he found it, “Oh, a male?” But we got on great. I get on with my own social worker Grace and no disrespect in the staff at Aberlour, they’re so easy to talk to. And if you’re wrong, they’ll put you in your place like a wife would do. \u003Cem>[laughs]\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liam\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Every day is a learning experience. But it does sound like you’ve got one big family going on there with the guys at Aberlour. So thank you so much, David and Jacqui, for joining us on the first of the podcast series. You can find out more on our Central FM web pages, all to do with fostering locally in Forth Valley. We’ll have more on future episodes to come as well. But for now, thank you, David and Jacqui, for joining us today.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’re welcome. Thank you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Jacqui\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>You’re welcome. Thanks for having me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Fostering Podcast: Meet our fostering couple, David & Jacqui - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FAberlour-DavidAndJacqui.jpg",{"id":183,"author_id":19,"slug":184,"is_featured":7,"title":185,"content":186,"content_overview":10,"published_at":187,"seo_title":188,"seo_description":10,"image":189,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},13,"jos-volunteering-story","Jo’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>In the summer of 2021, Jo was matched as a Volunteer Befriender with Aberlour’s Sustain service. Having had previous experience of befriending, Jo was looking for another Scottish children’s charity to support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I really enjoyed my previous experiences of befriending. I’ve always felt it’s important to give your time when you can, and I had time to spare. I loved that Aberlour had a range of different programmes and activities for supporting Scottish children and their families throughout the whole country. Having worked previously in the justice sector, I know how vital early intervention is, so Aberlour’s vision of reaching children and their families before a point of crisis really resonated with me. Now I’m a Befriender to a fantastic mum of three.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When Jo moved away from Scotland, she remained committed to supporting her Befriendee, continuing contact remotely and they have built a trusting relationship.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I remotely befriend via video calls – so really just having a good blether! When I first started with my current Befriendee, I was still living and working in Scotland. We went on a few walks and coffee and cake trips before we moved remotely, but the main activity – a good blether! – has stayed the same.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I like to think it has given the mum I work with just a safe non-judgemental space to talk things through. You’re not there to solve their problems but you can be there to lend an ear. I think that really can make a difference – someone who is not part of their normal network and who doesn’t have an agenda. It feels nice being there for someone through a challenging time.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Jo also feels that volunteering has been a positive experience for her, helping to develop her own skills, and would encourage others to get involved.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Aside from the initial training giving me skills and information on things like child protection, befriending also helps me improve my listening and communication skills – which is great since my day job is in communications! I think volunteering can be incredibly grounding and it’s really rewarding doing something that is totally different from what you do for work.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It really doesn’t matter who you are or what stage you are in life – Aberlour gives you all the training and ongoing support that you could possibly need and it’s incredibly rewarding. Thank you to Aberlour for supporting me to continue befriending on a remote basis – a true testament to their vision & values.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2022-11-01T00:00:00.000000Z","Jo's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fjo-watt-volunteer.jpg",{"id":191,"author_id":19,"slug":192,"is_featured":7,"title":193,"content":194,"content_overview":10,"published_at":195,"seo_title":196,"seo_description":197,"image":198,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},14,"connies-story","Connie’s Story","\u003Ch3>Aberlour has changed our lives. Without Aberlour’s support our children might have gone into care.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-17654 size-medium\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-300x168.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"168\" srcset=\"https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-300x168.jpg 300w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-1424x799.jpg 1424w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-768x431.jpg 768w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-1536x862.jpg 1536w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-250x140.jpg 250w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610-600x337.jpg 600w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2022\u002F09\u002FConnie-and-Family_Min_Lighter-scaled-e1663850752610.jpg 1926w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \u002F>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sam and I first met Wendy from Aberlour as we were struggling with family life and maintaining our house.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We were nervous about Wendy coming into our home. But after she reassured us, we knew Aberlour was different, we knew Aberlour was here to help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Wendy could see we weren’t coping. Our life was already hectic with two children, and Skylar was on her way.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My anxiety was awful, and my confidence was so low. Sam was also struggling with his mental health.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We built a strong bond with Wendy. Sam and I were able to discuss the many challenges we were facing.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our house was damp and freezing. We had storage heaters costing £200 per month to run, so we only used them when we had to.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Eva and Ethan constantly suffered from chest infections, colds and coughs. We were worried sick and didn’t know what to do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>But Wendy helped us.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>She got the council to replace the storage heaters with proper heating. Now we could afford to keep our house cosy and warm for our children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We had bare concrete floor in the hall and the children were sleeping in broken beds when Wendy first arrived. She applied to Aberlour’s Urgent Assistance Fund. The fund gave us a grant to buy the items we so desperately needed. We were so grateful.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Wendy also helped build our confidence as parents. She has helped us put routines in place for the children especially at bedtime. This really helped once Skylar arrived.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>She has helped us put activities in place with the children, allowing us to have fun together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Our house was hectic before. Having routine and structure has helped make our lives easier. We’re a much happier household for it.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am so proud of how far we’ve come. We’re more confident now. Calling the doctor to make an appointment for one of the children seemed impossible.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Now I know I can call and if one of the children is ill and must see a doctor in person, I’ll push for it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sam is also taking Eva and Ethan to nursery every day and picking them back up. Before Sam’s anxiety would stop him doing that. Wendy gave him top tips like to play music when he’s on the bus by himself or call a friend. Now he does the trip with no hesitation.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’m so glad we took the leap and accepted Wendy’s help. Without her support we wouldn’t be where we are today.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I love seeing how much Eva, Ethan and Skylar are growing and developing with our support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I love seeing Ethan getting his toy hoover out to help me while I am cleaning the house. I know that we are teaching our children important life skills.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Sam and I are so proud of our wee family, and we have only been able to do this because of Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>\u003Cstrong>Connie\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2022-09-22T00:00:00.000000Z","Connie's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Discover how Aberlour Childrens Charity supported Connie and her husband Sam to keep her three children at home.","media\u002FEva-and-Skylar-.jpg",{"id":200,"author_id":19,"slug":201,"is_featured":7,"title":202,"content":203,"content_overview":10,"published_at":204,"seo_title":205,"seo_description":206,"image":207,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},15,"lauries-volunteering-story","Laurie’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>In 2021, Laurie applied to volunteer with Aberlour while completing her degree in Psychology.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I wanted to sign up for volunteering because I felt it was really important to give back some of my time to those who need it most. I wanted to help those who are less fortunate than I am. The work of Aberlour is life changing and I really wanted to be part of that.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Laurie was matched as a Volunteer Befriender for a young boy and supported him to take part in fun activities in his local area.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“There are many aspects of volunteering that I enjoy, but the thing I enjoy the most is seeing the joy and happiness in the people I help. Just knowing that I am helping someone is so rewarding and special. Volunteering also makes me feel very special. I love the idea that I am helping others to make their lives just that little bit better.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Volunteering has been an opportunity for Laurie to develop skills in a new setting which she can use beyond her studies at university.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I have gained a lot of new skills since starting volunteering. I have learnt how to solve problems in high pressure situations. It has allowed me to develop my creativity skills, when planning new things to do with the young people I help. I have also gained experience in coordinating with others and working alongside people from all different backgrounds.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Volunteering is the perfect way to gain experience and skills that with help you for the rest of your life. You will work alongside so many people, coordinating different plans, and making sure everyone is on the right page. These are all things that will be crucial for starting a new job, or just getting by after university.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Laurie feels there’s lots to be gained from volunteering as a student, and would encourage others to do the same.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Do it, do it, do it! It is not only a good thing for your CV but you will form so many new friendships, and make memories that you will remember for ever. The fact that just giving up one afternoon a week is helping a vulnerable individual so much is so rewarding. You will gain so much valuable experience and it is so worth giving up just a little bit of your time to volunteer.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2022-02-09T00:00:00.000000Z","Laurie's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","To celebrate Student Volunteering Week, Laurie shares her experience of being a student volunteer with Aberlour.","media\u002FLauries-Story_Web-1.png",{"id":209,"author_id":19,"slug":210,"is_featured":7,"title":211,"content":212,"content_overview":10,"published_at":213,"seo_title":214,"seo_description":215,"image":216,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":137},16,"traceys-story","Tracey’s story","\u003Cp>Four years’ ago Brandon and Scott were taken into care. The boys always said they wanted to live with their mum again if they could. With the support of Aberlour Brandon and Scott were finally able to come back home. Tracey shares her story.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was first introduced to Ally and Chris from Aberlour to help my son’s, Brandon (16) and Scott (14), to return to family life after almost four years in foster care.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It took quite a bit for Scott to finally settle in at home. The boys were young when they were taken, and Scott was moved around a lot.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Aberlour has been amazing helping us get back into a routine, making sure the boys are coping at school and providing positive role models in their lives. The boys don’t get to see their dad very often as he lives in England, so it is important for them to have people to look up too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Ally and Chris have helped with Scott’s behaviour. He has ADHD with developmental delay. They helped us manage his behaviour and set boundaries which I wrote on a chalkboard so we could all see them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Scott is now much calmer and is doing well at school. Ally and Chris also take him out on bike rides and play football with him, giving them time to chat about anything he’s worried about.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Ally has also been supporting me. Now Brandon is 16 he’s classed as an adult and should have his own room. This means we need a bigger house. Ally has been helping me to understand the council house bidding system.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As a family we wouldn’t have received this help anywhere else. I know Aberlour will always be there for us if we need them; they’re just at the end of phone.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’m really looking forward to the future. I’m hopeful we get our house move and have a fresh start just the three of us.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Watch Tracey, Brandon and Scott share their story.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ciframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Aberlour Children's Charity Tracey's Story\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.youtube.com\u002Fembed\u002FDoNkJUlIpTM?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen>\u003C\u002Fiframe>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2022-02-08T00:00:00.000000Z","Tracey's story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Our Sustain services work with families whose children are at risk of being taken into to care to stay together. Tracey shares how Aberlour has supported her family.","media\u002FTraceys-Story_Web.png",{"id":218,"author_id":19,"slug":219,"is_featured":7,"title":220,"content":221,"content_overview":10,"published_at":222,"seo_title":223,"seo_description":224,"image":225,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},17,"jack-and-millys-first-christmas-fostering-story","Jack and Milly’s First Christmas Fostering Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>In August 2021, seven-year-old Marcus* joined Jack, Milly, Esme and Ivo’s family. This is the first Christmas they are spending together as a family of five which they are all very excited about.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Last Christmas was very different for Marcus. Marcus’ dad died from a drug overdose. His mother struggled to cope with her own addictions and the loss of her partner. Marcus was taken into emergency care. Sadly, this didn’t work out and a new long-term home needed to be found for Marcus. Then in August 2021, Marcus was introduced to \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffostering\">Aberlour foster carers\u003C\u002Fa> Jack and Milly.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>Jack and Milly’s Story\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>From the moment we first heard about Marcus, we felt a strong connection with him and expressed an interest in looking after him. It took around a month from first hearing about him, meeting him and lots of other meetings, until he moved in with us in August.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>He is a whirlwind of energy and brings lots of joy to our family.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Jack and I had been discussing becoming foster carers for a very long time but with a busy work and family life there was no time to ‘smell the roses’ as they say and think about our future properly. Then the first lockdown happened.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>This was a challenging time for the whole nation but the positives for us were that we got to spend more time as a family and take a step back and think about the direction of our lives. Every day we were hearing on the news about other people’s struggles. That put a different perspective on the safety and comfort as a family we were able to enjoy. It became clear to us that we were at a point in our lives that we could offer a safe, loving home to a child who needed one. After a lot of research, we found Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour is a highly respected care provider and the charity values and ethos fit very closely with our own. So in August 2020 I picked up the phone and started our journey.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>After nearly nine months and the longest most in-depth interview of our lives, we had finally achieved our dream job. We were foster carers!\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Then there was the wait. It was difficult. But the Aberlour team always explained the importance of the matching process for both the foster carers and the child. It has to be right. With Aberlour’s support we have found the perfect match in Marcus.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>Now we are ready to celebrate Christmas as a family of five.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It’s such a privilege being able to spend our first Christmas together and to shape Marcus’ impression of what Christmas is and what it can be. We understand that Christmas time can be overwhelming and a trigger for any child but especially for a child like Marcus who hasn’t had the best start. We have been trying to balance things between feeling magical and special but also low-key and stress free.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For example, we must be very careful talking about Father Christmas with Marcus. It is very daunting for child to be told a stranger is coming down the chimney in the middle of the night, especially a child with Marcus’ background. That threatens his feeling of safety at home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Marcus has no point of reference for what Christmas will be like for him as part of our family, he has no expectations. We have all had great fun putting up the Christmas tree together, opening our advent calendars every morning and starting our own new traditions. Esme, who is 19, and Ivo, who is 16, have really enjoyed revisiting their childhoods again by viewing Christmas through the eyes of their little brother.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Some of the board games we played as a young family have already come back out of the cupboard. Having Marcus around makes us all more conscious of the magic of this time of year again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>It is so important for Marcus to be part of our family at Christmas.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>These rare occasions when we are all together are so precious. We want to fold him into the warmth, love and contentment that come from these days together. Work, school and other obligations should not get in the way of fun, enjoyment and quality time together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The past four months have flown by. We are so proud of Marcus and how he is blossoming. The simple moments together like our family yo-yo spinning contests or listening to all our children singing together in the car, being silly together or cuddling up at story time are so precious.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As a family we want to help Marcus to achieve his full potential in life. To know he is loved and safe. To enjoy all that education can provide him, to make friends and creating meaningful relationships. But most of all to be happy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>If anyone reading this is thinking about becoming a foster carer then do it.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If you have lots of energy, patience and want to make a difference this could be your dream job. If you find it easy to remain playful, accepting, curious and empathetic when parenting (or working with children), then you are cut out for this role.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It is a privilege to have the opportunity to shape a child’s future positively and to see them blossom and grow under your care. Being a foster carer is not easy, but the rewards are deeply felt and life-changing for you, your family and the child you are looking after. Go for it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>\u003Cstrong>Milly & Jack\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fem>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Find out more about becoming an \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffostering\">\u003Cstrong>Aberlour foster carer>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-12-23T00:00:00.000000Z","Jack and Milly's First Christmas Fostering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","In August 2021, seven-year-old Marcus joined Aberlour foster carer's Jack and Milly's family. This is the story of their first Christmas.","media\u002FJack-Milly_website.png","2024-11-25T08:28:21.000000Z",{"id":228,"author_id":19,"slug":229,"is_featured":7,"title":230,"content":231,"content_overview":10,"published_at":232,"seo_title":233,"seo_description":10,"image":234,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},18,"kellys-befriending-story","Kelly’s Befriending Story","\u003Cp>Kelly has been a Volunteer Befriender with the Sycamore Residential Services in Fife for almost 5 years.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I decided to become a Volunteer Befriender after attending a local volunteers networking event. I heard first-hand from Befrienders on their experiences of being a Befriender and I got to meet a few young people who explained to me the impact Befrienders had on their lives – and most importantly, the fun and happiness this brought to their lives.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Kelly was matched as a Befriender for a 10 year old boy. Kelly and her Befriendee have had lots of fun together over the years. They’ve built a positive and supportive relationship based on sharing enjoyable experiences and trying new things together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“We have done so many fun things together – karting, starbucks, swimming, dog walks, climbing, meals, bowling, and ice skating to name a few! I even beat him at karting on our first race! I have genuinely enjoyed everything that the befriending role has to offer.  I’ve enjoyed being a part of a young person’s life, seeing him grow, mature, progress in his education and hobbies and generally loved spending time with him.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Because our befriending relationship has gone on over a long period of time, I’ve enjoyed seeing this young person mature from a cute wee 10 year old boy into a handsome maturing young man. I have enjoyed seeing the fun I have brought to his life and getting to know others within the residential house – the kids and the staff.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’m really proud of our long-term befriending relationship. I really do believe through our conversations, banter and fun that I have been able to have really meaningful conversations which have directly impacted on his life and outcomes but in a really informal and non-stigmatising way. We have grown to be friends and he often says how he really enjoys spending time with me and having fun.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For Kelly, volunteering with Aberlour has been a positive experience for both her Befriendee and for herself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“For me, befriending is being there for someone consistently to bring the best out in that person.  I initially did this to support my young person (with care experience) to have a friend out with the services or systems they often have to experience but the happiness it has brought for me has surprised me and it’s something I think I will always be involved in – one way or another.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I would 100% recommend befriending to others. Not only does it let you get involved in supporting young people with care experience, it brings so much more than that. Becoming a befriender is easy and the support I have from Aberlour has been great over my 5 years here.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-11-04T00:00:00.000000Z","Kelly's Befriending Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FKelly-Ireland-Volunteer-Experience-Photo-28.10.2021.docx.jpg",{"id":236,"author_id":19,"slug":237,"is_featured":7,"title":238,"content":239,"content_overview":10,"published_at":240,"seo_title":241,"seo_description":242,"image":243,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},19,"elizabeth-adeles-story","Elizabeth & Adele’s Story","\u003Cp>The COVID-19 pandemic has affected families in many different ways across the country. Elizabeth shares how our \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-sustain-north-ayrshire\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">North Ayrshire service\u003C\u002Fa> saved her family when things were completely out of control.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Elizabeth & Adele’s Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>The Coronavirus pandemic was really tough for our family and it nearly broke us. Before the first lockdown Adele was shown a video at school about a killer coronavirus. And then her auntie Kathleen caught it. Everything spiralled out of control for Adele from there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Adele suffers from grief, trauma and separation anxiety due to a traumatic start to her life. Her biological parents couldn’t look after her, so she came to live with me when she was 11 weeks old. I became her mum.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The combination of the pandemic and Adele’s auntie catching the virus triggered some bad memories for Adele and she couldn’t cope.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Adele became violent. She trashed our house three nights in a row. She wasn’t sleeping at night, sometimes she would finally crash out at 6am, and she wasn’t eating. I was really struggling and I didn’t know what to do so I turned to Adele’s school for help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The school Adele was attending offered her access to the nurture room online and by phone call. But this wasn’t the help Adele needed. Before the second lockdown Adele moved school, and it was at this school that the head teacher made the referral to Aberlour, and we were introduced to Nikki.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Nikki has been a real-life saver for our family.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Nikki listens to Adele and understands her. She allows Adele to talk about whatever is troubling her and knows the best way to get her to open up. Adele has even started to talk to Nikki about her birth parents.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>By talking with her, Nikki is starting to help Adele understand what happened in her early life and is helping her to accept it. Adele is only eight so I know that in the future more questions will come and I know Nikki and Aberlour will always be there to help us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For me, Nikki is always there as a sounding board. No matter the time of day, I can contact her if we are struggling. She reassures me that what I am doing is right; that I am not failing as a parent. She provides advice so I can support Adele when she can’t deal with her emotions.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We have only been working with Nikki for seven months and I can see a massive positive difference, not only in Adele but in our family. Adele is much calmer and happier, and there have been no more violent outbursts. She can now process her emotions and feelings much better. I am starting to see my little girl coming back.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Our house is a happy house again.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>We are building a strong and open relationship together and I am so proud of her.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-09-21T00:00:00.000000Z","Elizabeth & Adele's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","The COVID-19 pandemic has affected families in many different ways across the country. Elizabeth shares how Aberlour saved her family when things were completely out of control.","media\u002FElizabeth-Adeles-Story_Web.png",{"id":245,"author_id":19,"slug":246,"is_featured":7,"title":247,"content":248,"content_overview":10,"published_at":249,"seo_title":250,"seo_description":10,"image":251,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},20,"katies-pride-month-story","Katie’s Pride Month Story","\u003Ch3>“I feel incredibly proud to say that I stand up for the rights of the LGBTQ+ community. I want to help shape the future of the young people we support to freely express who they are.”\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-14804 alignleft\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-300x300.jpg\" alt=\"katie shares thoughts on pride month\" width=\"300\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-300x300.jpg 300w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-150x150.jpg 150w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-250x250.jpg 250w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-500x500.jpg 500w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-600x600.jpg 600w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog-100x100.jpg 100w, https:\u002F\u002Fweb-backend.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2021\u002F06\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog.jpg 753w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \u002F>This June, we’ve celebrated Pride Month, where we raise awareness and celebrate the lives and experiences of LGBTQ+ people in our communities.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At Aberlour, we strive to promote diversity and inclusion throughout the charity – amongst the staff and the children, young people, and families we support within our services.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My name is Katie, and I’m the Assistant Service Manager for our Dundee Services. I went through a lot of emotional turmoil as a teenager, worrying about others opinions of my life and who I loved: this just so happened to be a girl. For many years, I hid who I truly was from people in my life because I feared being bullied or discriminated against.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As a teenager at school, I barely knew anything about LGBT rights. Still, I knew what I wanted in my life, which was a relationship with a girl. For me, the opinion of others was a heavy burden to hold. However, 15 years from realising my sexuality, I can now look back and say that I am proud of who I am. I am proud to work in an organisation that promotes inclusion and has a real focus on promoting LGBTQ+ rights.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The Scottish Government approved the same-sex marriage law in February 2014, which was life-changing for me. This news was the most exciting news of my life; it meant that I could marry my high school girlfriend and have the same rights as any other marriage. So in July 2016, we got to do just that, and I married my best friend.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>While Pride is primarily a celebratory event, we would do well to reflect on our LGBTQ+ history and recognise the privilege of freedom of expression in Scotland compared to the rest of the world. I feel grateful to live in a country that allows people to express who they are and explore their identities freely.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I feel incredibly proud to say that I stand up for the rights of the LGBTQ+ community. I want to help shape the future of the young people we support to freely express who they are. I want to take a positive stance against discrimination and violence towards the LGBTQ+ community and progress equality and awareness within our organisation.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Happy Pride month 😊\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-06-29T00:00:00.000000Z","Katie's Pride Month Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fkatie-pride-month-blog.jpg",{"id":253,"author_id":19,"slug":254,"is_featured":7,"title":255,"content":256,"content_overview":10,"published_at":257,"seo_title":258,"seo_description":259,"image":260,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},21,"bens-volunteering-story","Ben’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>I started volunteering with Aberlour’s befriending service in October 2020. I had suffered from anxiety and depression. As part of my efforts to improve my mental health, I wanted to find new ways to engage positively with my local community and contribute towards improving it in some way.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I had already started \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">volunteering\u003C\u002Fa> elsewhere as a mentor and the positivity I felt as a result helped me to gain a valuable perspective on what I could do to help myself and others. I felt, and continue to feel, like I had something positive to offer people experiencing difficulties in their lives.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Volunteering has helped massively to improve my self-esteem and has given me the encouragement and belief that I can do more to help others with the additional bonus of helping myself as a result.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Aberlour was the right choice for me\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>It was my wife who first introduced me to Aberlour. Like a dutiful husband, I trusted her judgement and applied to become a befriender because she recommended it. My wife is full of good ideas and through her work as a teacher and her role as pupil support, she has wide ranging knowledge of organisations that offer support to children and young people in need. She sent me some information on Aberlour and it resonated strongly with my desire to help young people and instinctively I felt Aberlour was the right choice for me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Free from judgement\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I aim to meet weekly with my match and we spend time together, providing them with some respite from the challenges in their life and an opportunity to talk about whatever they like. It can be serious and profound discussions about their life, or sharing jokes and stories from our mis-spent youths or cycling together, enjoying some fresh air and exploring new places. It’s a chance for my match to spend our time together in the most beneficial way to them at that moment, be it exploring issues safely and free from judgement or leaving those issues behind and finding new ways to occupy their time and head space. I’ve found that getting to know each other in a pressure free environment, building a rapport and establishing trust by walking and talking has been a very simple but productive and positive way to share our time together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I’m making a positive impact on someone’s life\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>What I like about volunteering for Aberlour is getting to know new people from walks of life that I might not have crossed paths with otherwise, that has been refreshing and enjoyable. Feeling good about my role in the world and hearing about the positive impact I’ve made on someone else’s life has made me feel really good about myself too. I have further developed my listening skills, my ability to empathise and my understanding of what it is to play a productive role in my community. Through the training provided I have gained valuable knowledge of the theory behind my volunteering role and have taken that knowledge and applied it to my own life which has benefitted me greatly and improved my ability to help others.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Volunteering has shown the young person and family I work with that they are valued members of a shared society and that they can rely on that society to help them through difficult situations. It has helped to boost their self-esteem and self-worth and that has helped them to support those around them too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would definitely encourage others to volunteer for Aberlour. It’s incredibly rewarding for both those that volunteer and the people we support. It makes you feel good about yourself and in some small way it makes the world a better place. What’s not to like about that?\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-06-02T00:00:00.000000Z","Ben's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Read Ben's volunteering story and find out why be loves being a volunteer befriender with Aberlour to celebrate volunteers' week.","media\u002FVolunteers-Week_Bens-Story_Website.jpeg",{"id":262,"author_id":19,"slug":263,"is_featured":7,"title":264,"content":265,"content_overview":10,"published_at":266,"seo_title":267,"seo_description":268,"image":269,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},22,"lauras-fostering-story","Laura’s Fostering Story","\u003Cp>I have always wanted to become a foster carer. I come from a very large family and have always been there to help my younger family members through any hard times in their lives. I knew I wanted to help children as every child deserves a happy childhood. At 32 I decided it was time to start investigating and that is when I was introduced to \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffostering\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The Aberlour team were so warm and friendly. When we first met I was a little anxious as I am young, single and don’t have any experience looking after children on my own. However, that didn’t matter. Unlike other agencies, the Aberlour team had no pre-conceived notions of whether I could be a foster carer or not due to my age and lack of experience. They listened to me and knew that I was able to provide a loving and stable home for a child who needed it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The approval process to become a foster carer took around 8 months. It was very intense. You have to be very open about your life, and being open to people you don’t know is difficult. The team at Aberlour was really helpful and made the process easier. Everyone is so friendly and nice, especially my contact Kerryanne, making it really easy to open up and talk. I have built a wonderful relationship with Kerryanne and I know the Aberlour team is always there 24\u002F7 no matter when I need them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I was so excited when I was approved to become a foster carer. But little did I know that I would get my first match at the beginning of a global pandemic. Before lockdown was announced I began the matching process for a 9-year-old boy called Paul. He had spent most of his life in care. Paul’s parents were unable to meet his needs or able to provide him with a warm and stable home. Paul had experienced a number of placement breakdowns due to the fact that he hadn’t properly bonded with his foster carers. I had met with Kerryanne, Paul’s social worker and his current carer as it was vital to make sure I was the right carer for Paul.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lockdown was announced and I was in tears thinking I was going to be on my own. Little did I know that I would be getting the most important call, telling me Paul was coming to live with me. A few days after Britain was placed in complete lockdown he had moved in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes, it was daunting as it was a rather unique situation. No one had ever been in this situation before. But it gave Paul and I time to bond. We got to make our own memories together and got to know each other without family, schools or anyone else getting in the way. We both love arts and crafts so every week we would decorate our front window with a different theme. We would play board games, watch films and even bake! Paul loves baking, it’s not something I am good at and most of our bakes ended up in the bin but we had fun while doing it. We would go for lots of walks and I was able to help Paul learn all about his new neighbourhood. We were able to become our own little family unit very quickly, which might have taken longer in a non-pandemic world.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour was always there to help. Kerryanne might not have been able to come around to the house like she usually would but we would meet twice a week online to chat and discuss any of my concerns. The team are available 24\u002F7 so I knew if I ever needed them they were there and Kerryanne’s check in messages were and are always appreciated. While Paul and I were in the house together, we knew we weren’t alone.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am so proud that we survived and celebrated our first year together in March. I am looking forward to the future and helping Paul settle in at school and make friends, going on holiday, meeting my family and making more memories. I want Paul to know he is loved and to enjoy his childhood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If anyone reading this is thinking about becoming a foster carer, please do it. Don’t let your age, relationship status or lack of experience get in the way. If you have a home and love to give then go ahead. Being a foster carer is one of the hardest things I have ever done but it is the most rewarding. A smile on Paul’s face is worth everything.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you change a life? \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffostering\">Find out more about becoming an Aberlour foster carer.\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Names changed and stock image used to protect anonymity.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-05-13T00:00:00.000000Z","Laura's Fostering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","For Foster Care Fortnight Laura shares her fostering story and encourages others to provide a loving a stable home for a child in need.","media\u002FLauras-Fostering-Story_Website.png",{"id":271,"author_id":19,"slug":272,"is_featured":7,"title":273,"content":274,"content_overview":10,"published_at":275,"seo_title":276,"seo_description":277,"image":278,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},23,"jacquies-fostering-story","Jacquie’s Fostering Story","\u003Cp>My husband and I have been foster carers with Aberlour for 9 years. Fostering was something we always thought about doing. We both worked in the care sector, my husband still does, and my parents were foster carers while I was growing up. We were just waiting for the right time for us and 2012 was it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Ciaran was our first full time placement. He was only slightly older than my daughter and my son was only a few years older. I think that made Ciaran becoming part of our family a little easier, as all of the kids were around the same age. Before coming to live with us Ciaran had a difficult life. He suffered a lot of emotional and physical neglect. Since he has been with us he has been doing so well. He is a really confident and caring boy. He has made lots of friends and is doing well at school. It was Ciaran who actually suggested that we foster another child. He wanted another child who had, had a difficult start to join our family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Kerryanne from Aberlour was so supportive when we started talking about fostering another child. She had complete confidence in us that we could take another child on and make our family of five, a family of six. And that’s when Arron joined our family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It wasn’t until Arron came to live with us that he was diagnosed with ADHD and autism. Before that it had been misunderstood for bad behaviour. Since his diagnosis everything has just fallen into place for him. Having ADHD and autism does mean that Arron has different needs from the other children. We all go about our life trying to make it as normal an environment for him as possible. He is a wee chatterbox. In the house he is fantastic, he loves the usual things like computers and is obsessed with his Xbox. He struggles at school socially but that is part of his learning style, social situations are a challenge for him but he manages them well and is doing really well at school.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am so proud of our family. I am so proud that we have been able to give Ciaran and Arron a place in it. We have been able to help them both to be who they are and who they want to be. To let them be themselves, to be part of a loving family and to know that no matter what they do we will still be there to look after them and care for them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The future is looking bright for us. Ciaran and my daughter are making their choices in school. Ciaran is staying on at school to study sport and fitness. My oldest son is at university now. Before I know it, they will all have grown up and left me! We are just trying to support them the best we can with whatever path way they go down in life. They will always be part of our life and family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We really wouldn’t foster if we didn’t do it with \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffostering\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa>. The team are amazing and support you in whatever ways you need supported. It isn’t one size fits all. They are always there day or night, whenever you need them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If anyone reading this is thinking of becoming a foster carer, do it! It has definitely enhanced our lives and our children’s lives massively. It has given all the kids an insight, to not judge anyone and not to assume someone’s behaviour is for a certain reason. They are all really loving, caring and kind children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Yes it can be hard and difficult at times, goodness sometimes really confusing, but our boys have made our life so much more enjoyable.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>If you feel you can give a child a loving home, and you can support them, and love them no questions asked you should do it. Take the chance and invite them into your home and life. It will certainly enhance your life and hopefully, with the right support, it will enhance theirs.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffostering\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more about becoming a foster carer with Aberlour>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-05-06T00:00:00.000000Z","Jacquie's Fostering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Jacquie shares her fostering story to celebrate Foster Care Fortnight. If you feel you can give a child a loving home you should do it.","media\u002FThe-Fallon-Family_Website.jpg",{"id":280,"author_id":19,"slug":281,"is_featured":7,"title":282,"content":283,"content_overview":10,"published_at":284,"seo_title":285,"seo_description":286,"image":287,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},24,"lunas-story","Luna’s Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">This February, It’s LGBT History Month, where we raise awareness and celebrate the lives and experiences of LGBTQ+ people in our communities. We strive to promote diversity and inclusion throughout \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">, including supporting our young people to embrace who they are and achieve their full potential. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Luna has been supported by \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour’s\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> Glasgow Family Service since she was fourteen. Here’s her story. In her own words, she shares her journey in discovering her gender identity and how \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> supported her to become more confident with her true self.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">“From age fourteen, I never felt like I \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">fit\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">ted\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> in with my classmates. I had no shared interests with the boys, and I didn’t feel comfortable with the girls as I felt conflicted with my gender identity. An outcome of ‘not fitting in’ was I was subjected to bullying as I was ‘quiet’ and ‘different’. I had an overwhelming feeling that I was different and couldn’t quite understand why. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Unfortunately, my school had no resources around gender identity, and the topic was not spoken about in broader society. My housing scheme was not very LGBT friendly. My experiences of another transgender person, who was older\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">and was\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> ridiculed, making my conflict harder to accept. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Through no fault of their \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">o\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">w\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">n m\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">y family didn’t understand the issue\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">,\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">which made me bottle up my feelings and conform to a male’s ‘normal’ roles. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Upon leaving school, I enrolled in college. Initially, my expectations were that I could be \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">more true\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> to my real gender identity. Unfortunately, this was not to be as I was immediately singled out by \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">lecture\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">r\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">s saying, “not many boys do this course”. This made me feel reserved and nervous about being true to myself. I only managed one year in college, and the lecturers clashed with me, so I felt unsupported and didn’t want to continue my course. I lost someone very close to me when I was eighteen, which only made me more insular and reserved, which lasted until I was twenty-one. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">With the support of friends and \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> staff, I felt comfortable coming out and finally being myself. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> has supported me with ongoing emotional support, securing funds to buy me clothes and makeup to suit my gender identity. They have pointed me in the direction of support for LGBT people. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> staff have always been on hand to offer advice and give me the confidence to be me. My attitude to life, my \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">demeanour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> and even the way I talk to people are more positive thanks to their support.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">If I was asked to give advice to a younger person who is going through what I have\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">,\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> then I would say look for local support groups\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">,\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> like \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">Aberlour\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\">. There is an abundance of resources online for the LGBT community. Surround yourself with a friend group that you can rely on and will not judge you for who you are. I would stress to anyone that they should be true to themselves and not fight who they are but embrace it.”\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-contrast=\"auto\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003Cspan data-ccp-props=\"{"201341983":0,"335559739":160,"335559740":259}\"> \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-02-18T00:00:00.000000Z","Luna's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Luna has been supported by Aberlour's Glasgow Family Service since she was fourteen. Here's her story. In her own words, she shares her journey in discovering her gender identity and how Aberlour supported her to become more confident with her true self.","media\u002Fluna-2-square.jpg",{"id":289,"author_id":19,"slug":290,"is_featured":7,"title":291,"content":292,"content_overview":10,"published_at":293,"seo_title":294,"seo_description":295,"image":296,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":95,"updated_at":226},25,"ciaras-volunteering-story","Ciara’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>To celebrate Student Volunteering Week Ciara shares her story on why she wanted to volunteer for Aberlour and the benefits she has gained from volunteering.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Ciara’s Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>As a Psychology student with a keen interest in the domains of Forensic and Clinical Psychology, the opportunities Aberlour offered were the perfect fit for both utilizing my degree in a real life setting and for further developing skills and knowledge to enhance my learning.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The training for my role as part of the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-family-support-service-glasgow\u002F\">Aberlour Family Support Service\u003C\u002Fa> in Glasgow was theory based and in depth which enabled me to be well prepared for any scenarios which may arise throughout my time working with those affected by domestic abuse. It was flexible around my studies and elicited applicative value to what I have learned at University. This opportunity has allowed me to play a role in supporting vulnerable members of society whilst developing academically and personally.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The staff at Aberlour are passionate and driven to making a difference in the lives of their service users which is a trait I aim to uphold. In addition to this, I have obtained invaluable experience and knowledge which will greatly assist in future study or employment and hope to continue in learning and developing in this role and others that may arise at Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more about volunteering with Aberlour>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2021-02-11T00:00:00.000000Z","Ciara's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Ciara share's her experience of volunteering with Aberlour while being a student","media\u002FVolunteering-Ciara_Website.jpg",{"id":298,"author_id":19,"slug":299,"is_featured":7,"title":300,"content":301,"content_overview":10,"published_at":302,"seo_title":303,"seo_description":10,"image":304,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},26,"a-day-in-the-life-of-a-youth-worker-during-covid-19","A day in the life of a youth worker during COVID-19","\u003Cp>My job is to support young people and children growing up in vulnerable families with weekly face to face meetings; either at one of our youth clubs and workshops or out and about on our weekly street shifts. This is a fantastic way to engage the youth with fun activities that may otherwise keep them out of trouble. However, the COVID-19 pandemic has brought many changes to our lives and the way we deliver youth work. Here is what a day in my life as a youth worker looks like now…\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>8 am:\u003C\u002Fstrong> After breakfasting with my wife and son, I post a positive quote on our private Facebook group for the young people and parents that we support, in the hope that it will inspire or at the very least calm anxieties.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>10 am:\u003C\u002Fstrong> Next on the list is making phone calls or texting all these parents checking in to make sure they are coping; they have enough provisions and their child has enough resources to keep themselves busy. The latter is quite challenging as many of the young people in our YouthPoint service are used to playing outside all day, which they now cannot do. Instead, we encourage them to stay active with weekly football challenges, arts and crafts tutorials, photo competitions, and much more.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>1 pm:\u003C\u002Fstrong> Thanks to the Aberlour Coronavirus Urgent Assistance Fund I manage to secure a grant for a young person we support who was forced to sleep on a mattress for months. I have also made calls on behalf of many families to help apply for fuel grants, so we can alleviate some of the stress in their life. I hear of other colleagues being able to secure cash for families we support, so they can get essentials such as food, gas, electricity, and replace broken appliances.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>3 pm:\u003C\u002Fstrong> It is time to do some grocery shopping for families in desperate need. We are buying food, nappies, baby formula, and other essentials that my colleagues will deliver all around Glasgow. Once done I drive around Pollok and the surrounding areas to deliver cooked meals to vulnerable families. Afterwards I have a catch-up call with another colleague who is also delivering hot meals in Govan as part of a partnership we recently secured with the local housing association.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>5 pm:\u003C\u002Fstrong> My final activity is writing up the reports for everything we’ve accomplished today. Even though it was a long and busy day I’m looking forward to another day of helping people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>There are many more ways in which we help and support vulnerable families and young people and I’m happy that we are managing to keep up the good work even during these extraordinary circumstances.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Stuart,\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour Young People’s Worker\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-06-08T00:00:00.000000Z","A day in the life of a youth worker during COVID-19 - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FStuart-scaled.jpg","2024-07-25T09:39:55.000000Z","2024-11-25T08:28:22.000000Z",{"id":308,"author_id":19,"slug":309,"is_featured":7,"title":310,"content":311,"content_overview":10,"published_at":312,"seo_title":313,"seo_description":10,"image":314,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},27,"mikes-volunteering-story","Mike’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>“Volunteering at Aberlour has been very fulfilling for me.  I have been teaching music ever since I first learned guitar at the age of 16, and it is really great to give young people the chance to do the same.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Watch Mike’s online concert with a young person he teaches:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ciframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Teaching young people music during COVID-19\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.youtube.com\u002Fembed\u002FuGB0VGAXlaY?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen>\u003C\u002Fiframe>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-06-04T00:00:00.000000Z","Mike's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fmike-1.png",{"id":316,"author_id":19,"slug":317,"is_featured":7,"title":318,"content":319,"content_overview":10,"published_at":320,"seo_title":321,"seo_description":322,"image":323,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},28,"fostering-on-a-farm","Fostering on a farm","\u003Cp>Meet Lorna*, the owner of a farm offering short breaks and equine therapy sessions to young people and children promoting learning, mental well-being, and nature connection.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The children and young people that visit the farm are between 7 and 20 years old and have a range of different needs. Encountering farm animals and life in the countryside helps them grow and learn valuable lessons while finding new interests.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>Animals could teach children and young people valuable lessons\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>about unconditional love, respect and acceptance.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The young people who visit are free to act at whatever age and stage of development they are at, they often crumple to the ground and roll in the hay or hide in the long grass” says Lorna*. The freedom to play in this environment is also very beneficial and they often express how they are feeling through games and imaginary scenarios. The physical aspect of being in the countryside around animals offers a form of motivation for children, that otherwise do not like to walk, run, or climb and helps with their hand and eye co-ordination and balance.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>No two days on the farm are the same…\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>with animals and children, as both require a certain amount of routine and boundaries to thrive and grow. The young people who visit learn more about the world around them by caring for the animals, having the freedom to run in the fields, and by witnessing the changes in the seasons and weather. They learn more about the animals and harvesting of crops, and ultimately where food for humans comes from. Watching the birds making their nests and seeing the eggs and the chicks – and how the parents protect their young and feed them. They even have their own patch of grass where they can sow seeds, take care of them, and watch them grow.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The children learn to handle and care for domestic animals. Leading, riding, and grooming the ponies, putting plaits in their manes and tails, painting their hooves with glitter, and putting coloured stencils on their body. They also learn to respect the pony’s size and how they communicate with each other as well as with humans.  Likewise, they learn how to interact with the dogs by brushing, feeding, walking, training, and playing with them. Some young people have also been able to tame the feral cat who lives on the farm with gentle persistence and patience.  We also found kittens from a stray cat and nurtured them. They enjoy feeding the hens, collecting the eggs when they are still warm, noticing how different hens lay different coloured eggs. During lambing season, they have held and fed the new-born lambs.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>Fun and educational experiences\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The benefits from the above experiences are enormous, they are not only fun and educational, but they also offer valuable therapy by observing the animal’s behaviors and watching how they interact with each other. The routine and care involved in looking after animals offer a form of structure and naturally occurring boundaries. Whilst handling the animals and learning new skills the children’s self-esteem and confidence grow. The young people hugely benefit from one-to-one time which ensures a safe environment and over time helps them become more independent to carry out tasks on their own.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For some of the young people, their greatest achievement is overcoming their fears – it may be the size of the animals, the dark, or the fear of climbing on the high hay bales. As a result of their experiences the children are enthusiastic, and this often creates another interest i.e. in growing plants, painting, or photography. As time goes by the children often reflect on previous experiences and sometimes want to revisit them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Whilst day to day life goes on, the most important fact is that at all times the children are creating memories, life skills, and forming attachments.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lorna*\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour Foster Carer and Farm Owner\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*name changed\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-05-18T00:00:00.000000Z","Fostering on a farm - Aberlour - Web Backend","Meet Lorna*, the owner of a farm offering short breaks and equine therapy sessions to young people and children promoting learning, mental well-being, and nature connection.The children and young people that visit the farm are between 7 and 20 years old and have a range of different needs. Encountering farm animals and life in the countryside helps them grow and learn valuable lessons while finding new interests.","media\u002Fholly-mandarich-kCpCd6oQTCw-unsplash-scaled-e1590509669787-300x300-1.jpg",{"id":325,"author_id":19,"slug":326,"is_featured":7,"title":327,"content":328,"content_overview":10,"published_at":329,"seo_title":330,"seo_description":10,"image":331,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},29,"catelyns-story","Catelyn’s Story","\u003Cp>Meet Catelyn, she and her husband have been foster carers with Aberlour and have fostered 3 children. Catelyn shares why she became a foster carer and why others should too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Something you didn’t know you needed\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Becoming a foster carer was not something I planned, it just happened. I was doing a favour to my brother and sister-in-law who were fostering and needed someone to take care of their children while they were on holiday. Their holiday was over, and they took their children back, but I never wanted my foster caring journey to end… That is when I decided to become a full-time foster carer. I did some research and asked a friend who was also fostering, and she recommended me to choose Aberlour because they provide the best training and support. And she was right!\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“Supportive, Warm, Welcoming, Friendly”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>To sum up my experience with Aberlour in a few words, I would say they are supportive, warm, welcoming, and friendly. Within 30 minutes of phoning the team your contact person will be in your house, helping you. That makes all the difference, you can speak to them like they are your friends, and with time they become a part of your family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>During lockdown, I had lots of phone calls asking me if I need help with anything, and if we needed blackout window coverings so Jake* can sleep better at night. All these little things make you feel like you are in good hands:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>“it is an absolute pleasure working with such a friendly, caring, supportive team and they’re all very much appreciated.” \u003C\u002Fem>– Catelyn\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>The little things in life…\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The children that I have fostered all came from quite neglected families. They had no experience with things most people would expect for a child to know – simple things like going on a holiday, or even to a restaurant for dinner, they have never done! So, it is really interesting and fun to rediscover those experiences and appreciate the little things in life that we take for granted.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Fostering is really rewarding; we still keep in touch with all the children I have fostered. They are like an extended family and we are so proud of all of them, the adoption parents are very nice too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Anyone can be a foster carer\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I would encourage anyone thinking of becoming a foster carer. I really enjoy it because it enabled me to have a full-time job and be home when my children were growing up. I am also my own boss, and that is amazing. A lot of people think fostering is not for the average person, whereas all you need is a kind heart, a sense of humour and a spare bedroom. Aberlour will take care of the training and arrange everything else for you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Ffoster-care\u002F\">\u003Cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone wp-image-7073 size-full\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fwp-content\u002Fuploads\u002F2017\u002F02\u002Ffosterenquire1.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"250\" height=\"83\" \u002F>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-05-13T00:00:00.000000Z","Catelyn's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fboy-running-to-woman-2495565-scaled-e1589383286565.jpg",{"id":333,"author_id":19,"slug":334,"is_featured":7,"title":335,"content":336,"content_overview":10,"published_at":337,"seo_title":338,"seo_description":10,"image":339,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},30,"liz-and-sarahs-story","Liz and Sarah’s Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Liz has been Sarah’s foster carer for under a year. Together they share their journey, the ups, the downs and their exciting plans for the future.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Liz begins by explaining why she wanted to become a \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Ffoster-care\u002F\">foster carer\u003C\u002Fa>: “About three years ago I started looking into fostering. I wanted to support a teenage girl around 13 to 15 years old on the cusp of becoming an adult, to help her navigate all the challenges and opportunities that brings with it. I thought I had something to offer, given my background as a youth worker and more recently my work on violence against women and girls.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Although I Initially explored the possibility of fostering an unaccompanied asylum-seeking young woman, I ended up fostering with Aberlour due to a chance discussion with one of their assistant directors, Maxine. Maxine asked if I had thought about fostering a Glaswegian young person and after some discussion, I realised I’d still be able to help a teenage girl.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The process to become a foster carer is very thorough and interesting. It really does prepare you for the commitment you are making to a young person and for the associated changes to your life. It took around seven months from beginning to end for me. We covered lots of things from my own experience of childhood to how I respond to life situations as an adult. Basically, how well do you know yourself? And how aware are you of how you deal with issues and situations?”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The Aberlour team are very supportive. I have met the whole team, which is great as they are all there to support both Sarah and me. I love the fact that it isn’t a remote, distant service. When I call for any reason, I know who I am talking to and they know me. I am really impressed by it; it’s a very forward-thinking model which provides reassurance.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Back in June, only a short time after I became an approved foster carer, I received a call from Kerryanne to say a possible match had arisen. Then two to three weeks later Sarah came for her first visit. It all happened really fast.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“Now Sarah has been living with me for nearly a year.”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Before I met Liz, I met with foster carers living in Ayr,” said Sarah. “I went for the weekend but that didn’t go has planned so my social worker started to look for a new permanent foster carer for me. Before moving in with Liz I had been living with an emergency foster care family. What was meant to be 28 days turned into 10 months while we found the right home for me.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Liz goes on to explain: “The good thing about the matching process is you get to meet with the young person. I thought Sarah was a good match for me on paper, but the written word felt a bit one dimensional. Meeting with Sarah made it real and spending time together made it more of a mutual, two-way thing. If Sarah didn’t think I was a match for her as well then it wouldn’t work.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“After we had our first meeting I then came to stay with Liz for a weekend. The weather was great, we got to go out and do loads of things. I was only meant to bring a few of my own personal things but I ended up bringing half my stuff that weekend, we were surrounded by boxes! We planned how we were going to decorate my room and what furniture we needed to buy. I knew I wanted to move here and live with Liz, I just felt comfortable from the beginning,” said Sarah.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Liz goes on: “It hasn’t all been easy. There have been lots of discussions and boundary setting. Sarah’s previous foster carers restricted her quite a lot, especially with the use of her mobile phone and going out with friends. However, as she is nearly 16 years old, I have been supporting her to become more independent and given her a fair amount of responsibility and trust.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“She has responded brilliantly! Now she gets the train on her own and goes out with her friends at the weekend. We have only been able to do this through talking openly and honestly, with Sarah learning to take responsibility for her actions.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“It has been amazing to see Sarah grow in confidence over the past few months.”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I feel really positive about what we have achieved so far together. After only a few months, Sarah is doing well at school. She has very supportive teachers and has made a great group of friends. She is getting involved in all of school life from helping the P7s with their transition to signing in visitors at parents evening. Now we are getting a plan in place to help Sarah with her exams. But it isn’t just academic goals we are focusing on.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sarah explains: “I would like to get a job when I turn 16, so I can start earning a wee bit of my own money. I am very busy though, I volunteer with Aberlour as I love working with younger kids, I have dancing at school and go to singing lessons, so we just need to see where I could fit it in. Also, Liz is helping me to get back in touch with my family. My sister, niece, auntie and cousins don’t live far away from here. And she has started to speak with my auntie who lives up North too. It is really important to me to get to know my family better and it’s good that Liz is helping me to do it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“If anyone is thinking of becoming a foster carer, I would definitely encourage them to do it.” \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It is important for me to be here with Liz. Apart from the time with my dad, my past experiences with my family weren’t always so good. But here I can start a new life and forget about the past. I have the opportunity to forget about what has happened and start fresh and do new things. I can be me. And I know I am staying here until I am at least 18. I have a choice.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“And I’ll be there every step of the way to support Sarah – no matter what she wants to do,” says Liz, smiling.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Ffoster-care\u002F\">Find out more about becoming a foster carer>>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-03-17T00:00:00.000000Z","Liz and Sarah's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FLizSarah_Web.jpg",{"id":341,"author_id":19,"slug":342,"is_featured":7,"title":343,"content":344,"content_overview":10,"published_at":345,"seo_title":346,"seo_description":347,"image":348,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},32,"jens-volunteering-story","Jen’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>Jen, one of our student volunteers, explains why she wanted to volunteer with Aberlour and what she loves the most.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My name is Jen, I’m 29 and I have been volunteering with Aberlour Children’s Charity since around May 2019.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I wanted to get involved in volunteering since starting at University. I study Psychology as my main degree subject and through learning about social and brain development in children I knew I had to try and see it first-hand. What I found out was essentially children are strange, and I love it! They ask the questions adults are too embarrassed to ask and they think very differently, which always makes for an interesting evening at the youth club.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The experience can be nerve racking, like anything when you do it for the first time, but the amount of training you receive is in abundance, and very much useful (which I couldn’t be more grateful for). I enjoy working as a youth club volunteer as it allows me (not only to play, like most adults want too) but to help guide and encourage young people towards new and exciting experiences in life that they might not otherwise be exposed to.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“During my time at the club so-far we have spent a lot of hours doing crafts and making things (fun for everyone involved I’d say), which is great, but I do like being able to ask the young people what they would enjoy doing and seeing if I could manage to make that happen. They are very interested in making slime (they never miss an opportunity to tell me), so I have tried to work along the lines of what they already enjoy doing but expanding it slightly. It can be a lot of fun just simply talking with them, as seeing the world through a child’s eyes can be eye opening for an adult.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Although I like children, I never expected to have as much fun and enjoy this experience as much as I do, I genuinely look forward to the youth club every Monday evening.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“If you have never worked with children before or have and want extra experience Aberlour is the perfect place to gain that. My advice to anyone wanting to volunteer would be to take all the training on offer, not only do they give you the necessary training for your role but offer extra training as well, which I imagine would cost a lot other-wise. Also do not be put off by the difficulty that working with children can bring. You get so much support through the charity for yourself personally that it makes the experience an extremely worth while one, and this experience is one of the most rewarding I’ve ever had.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you change a life and become an Aberlour volunteer? We have roles available across Scotland.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2020-02-13T00:00:00.000000Z","Jen's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","20% of Aberlour's volunteers are students. Jen shares her volunteering story about why she wanted to become a volunteer with Aberlour and why she loves it.","media\u002Fjen.jpeg",{"id":350,"author_id":19,"slug":351,"is_featured":7,"title":352,"content":353,"content_overview":10,"published_at":345,"seo_title":354,"seo_description":355,"image":356,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},31,"julias-story","Julia’s Story","\u003Cp>Three years ago, we received a call which changed my partner, Brian, and I lives forever. Brian’s sister had taken her own life. She had moved to England a year earlier with her daughter Zoe but due to family circumstances we hadn’t been in touch for a while. As soon as we received the call our first thoughts were ‘where is Zoe? We need to see her’, we are her family and she should be with us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>And so began our life changing journey.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Zoe was quite traumatised. Not only had she not had the best start in her life, but she had been in the house when her mum committed suicide. She saw her body on the bathroom floor. When her mum died, Zoe was placed into emergency foster care before being collected by her social worker and brought back to Scotland. Once social work was aware that Zoe had relatives who wished to care for her she was placed in a foster home near us. That was when the kinship process began, and I was introduced to Angela and the team at Aberlour.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Angela already knew Zoe. Aberlour had supported her, and her mum, when they lived locally. That was a comfort as we didn’t know Zoe, we didn’t have that close bond that you would expect to have with your niece due to our family fall out. However, Angela knew her really well and helped us to understand Zoe and why she would do things or ask for things to be a certain way. The service really helped with the transition so we could be the strong family we are today. Aberlour really was brilliant.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In the beginning when Zoe was staying with the foster carer I would go every morning to pick her up to take her to nursery. Then I would collect her at lunch time take her back to my house for her meals and bath. I would return her every evening just to sleep really. This was helpful as Brian and I don’t have kids of our own, we didn’t have that life experience also we didn’t have experience of Zoe from birth to 4 years old. It meant we had time to get to know each other. Within 2 months, Zoe was staying with us at the weekends. She would say “when am I moving in? I want to stay here forever”. Then 5 months later Zoe moved in. We were buzzing, we were delighted to finally have her living with us.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>But it really wasn’t easy. We really needed help.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Zoe was traumatised, she had been raised around violence, drugs and alcohol. She used to worry all the time. Her mum had treated her as a friend not a daughter, so she had developed really mature behaviours for a 4 year old. She didn’t know how to act around other children as she hadn’t been socialised or went to nursery before she lived with us, she had only been around adults. She would try to go to play with other children outside or at nursey and then would think ‘I can’t do this’ and would come back to sitting with adults.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>She was really difficult; she would lash out. She would pull my hair, in the first week of her staying full time I felt battered. She would trash her room and destroy all her belongings. I didn’t know a small child could cause so much chaos.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I also had my own depression to deal with. To spend the time I needed to with Zoe, I had to give up my job. I had been flung into looking after a 4-year-old who needed a lot of support due to everything she had experienced in her early life. Also, the stress of social work constantly watching. Having to attend meeting after meeting and constantly being terrified that if I did something wrong, they would take Zoe away from me. It was too much, I didn’t think I could cope. There was lots of tears and breakdowns. Brian and I have never really had time to grieve for his sister either. It was very hard to deal with a grieving child, to get on with your own life when you hadn’t grieved yourself and still dealing with what is going on around you.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We were in real danger of our family breaking down and Zoe being taking away from us. But I didn’t give up, I couldn’t have Zoe going anywhere else, she was mine and that’s it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Angela and Aberlour supported us all the way. We wouldn’t have gotten that support anywhere else.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Angela taught me all about 5 to thrive, brain development and stimulation so I could understand how Zoe’s brain was wired so I could support her the way she needed me to. I still use these techniques 3 years down the line, they are so helpful.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I was able to understand how the trauma Zoe had experienced had impacted on her and her actions. Angela helped me understand that when Zoe was two she used to have issues with the toilet so I learned that Zoe saw the toilet as a sanctuary, a safe place. I then worked with her to teach her if she was scared, she didn’t have to hide there anymore. Food was also a problem; Zoe had been told from a young age she couldn’t get food ‘because she would get fat.’ We had to work with her to break these barriers down.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Due to the violence Zoe had experienced at home before she moved in, she constantly had to know who was in the house and why they were there. At first, I found this really stressful as I had grown up in a traditional house where kids went to their room to play with their toys when the adults were talking. But Zoe had to know because she was scared, she was worried about my safety. She felt it was her responsibility to keep me safe. Once I understood this, I could help Zoe. I had to understand she was grieving, she was frustrated, she didn’t have her mum. She was so confused, didn’t know what was going on and worried that we were going to give her up. That was a big worry for her, if mum was able to do that, we were able to do that too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>With Angela, my mum and I would do a lot of reflective sessions to look at different ways to handle situations. It was so helpful, especially having other members of our family involved so we can be the strong supportive family network Zoe needs.\u003Cbr \u002F>\nZoe has come on leaps and bounds; I have come on leaps and bounds. It was months of work, and if it wasn’t for Aberlour supporting us I don’t think I would be where I am today. I have learned that as a parent you are always learning! I am so proud of Zoe; she is so resilient. She has made the biggest changes I have ever seen anyone make in a life, especially with what she has been through. She has sky-rocketed at school and she is so proud of what she has achieved. My proudest moment was when we finally got residency, knowing she is mine and not going anywhere else in her life. Seeing how well she is striving every day. She is not that child anymore she is such a cheeky, cheerful, young lady.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>To anyone reading this, please help Aberlour as they help people like me.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I have been a success because of the help they have given me. If I didn’t have support, then Zoe wouldn’t have had the support to be where she is today. I wouldn’t be where I am, and we could be looking at a completely different scenario for Zoe. I just can’t imagine that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The next big thing for us is adoption. We are family and we don’t really need a bit of paper to confirm it. But I think it is important for Zoe, so she feels she belongs. She wants to change her surname as well, so we are working on that. Zoe is always so positive, and she always looks to the future, I think that is something we all need to do more of.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Names changed and stock image used to protect anonymity.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Julia's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Julia was supported by Aberlour through the kinship care process when a family member passed away. Find out all about Julia's journey and her hopes for the future.","media\u002FJulia_Website.jpg",{"id":358,"author_id":19,"slug":359,"is_featured":7,"title":360,"content":361,"content_overview":10,"published_at":362,"seo_title":363,"seo_description":364,"image":365,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},33,"davids-story","David’s Story","\u003Cp>David first met Aberlour when he was 8 years-old and stayed in one of our residential homes. Then at 12 years-old through \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Ffostering\u002F\">Aberlour Fostering\u003C\u002Fa> David went to stay with his new mum and dad, Elaine and James, in 2011.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>While staying with Elaine and James, David was diagnosed with attachment difficulties and autism. With his parent’s support David has overcome many hurdles in his life and has managed to achieve one of his dreams of becoming a bus driver.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Read David’s story below in his own words about his experience growing up with Elaine and James and his hopes for the future.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>My Story\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Hiya, I have been having a think of what to say.  I’m not the best at English or expressing myself or opening up to anyone. I keep things to myself and don’t know how to put things down on paper but you asked me to talk about how well I have done so far in life.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Well I can start by saying I wouldn’t have achieved anything without the help from James and Elaine, who I see as my mum and dad and I look up to them. I knew from a very young age what I would like to do in life.  I had four dream jobs and they were: a race car driver, bus driver, truck driver or a train driver.  I struggled a lot at school and never really seemed to fit in with groups, so I had no real friends.  I suffered anxiety in most classes and took panic attacks.  I couldn’t focus or understand my subjects.  The only thing I did well in was music! I picked up a guitar when I was aged 8 and James and Elaine supported me all the way.  They got me lessons and I passed my music at the highest level which at the time was my biggest achievement. I felt happy knowing I left school getting something out of it, I guess.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I guess James and Elaine knew I wanted to do something with transport so they paid for my driving lessons, which I feel guilty about, but I saved up money and bought my first car.  After that I was never in. It was like a “fix” to me I had to drive it. I imagine the feeling was like someone who needs drugs or alcohol, it was just an excitement rush. It gave me my first element of freedom and in fact I drove 25,000 miles in the first year.  I loved and took pride in my car. I fixed it up and started to feel more independent.  At the end of the day however it is James and Elaine who helped make this first chapter and they helped me on the way to where I wanted to go in my life.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“They helped me with college, and I started to look for jobs.  My first job was bus driving with Stagecoach which was one of the four jobs I had wanted to do.  I tried my hardest to get it, but it wasn’t easy for me because I am not a positive thinking person. I was used to failing more often than being successful.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I am currently happy in life but now and again I feel down about things, and I am not always 100% happy.  All I ever wanted to do was make James and Elaine happy and proud and show people I can achieve something in life.  I felt pressure from myself to do my best because I wanted to do it for James and Elaine the most.  I know they are proud of me.  I couldn’t have asked for a better family.  I don’t always open up to them because I am a person who keeps things to myself. I think it’s because I don’t know what people will think of me.  Now I would really like them to give someone else a chance in life to do better.  It might not work, but with James and Elaine’s help, there is definitely the chance it will.  What’s meant is meant, they deserve so much credit, I feel rubbish because I can’t give them enough to thank them.  I would like to buy them a holiday for the 10\u003Csup>th\u003C\u002Fsup> anniversary of when they let me into their family but that still wouldn’t be enough.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>David\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Could you foster like James and Elaine did and give a child or young person like David a bright future?\u003C\u002Fstrong> There are children in towns and cities across Scotland waiting to be fostered and brought into a loving, stable home. You can make a difference. \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Ffoster-care\u002F\">Find out more about what’s involved.\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-11-07T00:00:00.000000Z","David's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","David first met Aberlour when he was 8 years-old and stayed in one of our residential homes. Then at 12 years-old through Aberlour Fostering David went to stay with his new mum and dad, Elaine and James, in 2011. David shares his story.","media\u002FDavid_Web.jpg",{"id":367,"author_id":19,"slug":368,"is_featured":7,"title":369,"content":370,"content_overview":10,"published_at":362,"seo_title":371,"seo_description":372,"image":373,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},34,"lewis-befriending-story","Lewis’ Befriending Story","\u003Cp>Lewis recently joined our \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fbefriending-young-refugees\u002F\">Befriending Young Refugees service\u003C\u002Fa> in Glasgow as a volunteer befriender. Here he shares his experience of becoming a befriender and why he wished to help young people arriving in Glasgow without their families.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I wanted to become a befriender with Aberlour as I was aware of the challenges refugees face in the UK. Volunteering as a befriender is an opportunity for me to help make a positive impact on a young person’s life, however small that might be. As I work from home everyday part of the appeal of becoming a befriender to me is its community focus and that it encourages me and my befriendee to take part in different activities in the city and surrounding area.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“To become a befriender Aberlour provided great training. It was in-depth, relevant, and interesting, including not only useful information on processes, issues, and challenges a newly arrived refugee might experience but also practical guidance on the befriending role. The session on planning trips was a definite highlight.  My favourite part was meeting the other volunteers and learning from them. The group was diverse, we all shared our ideas so lots of discussion and learning took place during every session.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My first match meeting with my befriendee was slightly nerve-racking but Sarah, the project co-ordinator, helped make the meeting easy and exciting. We were able to get a sense of one another, what the young person was interested in, and what they hoped to get out of the befriending scheme. I’ve been matched with a young person who speaks Arabic. He was referred to the project because he feels very low and finds it hard to leave the house, his Guardian was worried that he was becoming isolated.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“For our first meeting, we went to play pool in Glasgow city centre, which was my befriendee’s idea. The language barrier is tricky sometimes but playing games together meant we didn’t need to talk all the time. It was a relaxed couple of hours which we both enjoyed. I am looking forward to developing my relationship with my befriendee and helping Glasgow become their home.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At Aberlour we have befriending opportunities available across Scotland. Could you change a life and become a volunteer? \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\">\u003Cstrong>Find a role near you>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Lewis' Befriending Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Lewis recently joined our Befriending Young Refugees service in Glasgow as a volunteer befriender. Here he shares his experience of becoming a befriender and why he wished to help young people arriving in Glasgow without their families.","media\u002FLewis_Web.jpg",{"id":375,"author_id":19,"slug":376,"is_featured":7,"title":377,"content":378,"content_overview":10,"published_at":379,"seo_title":380,"seo_description":10,"image":381,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},35,"marys-befriending-story","Mary’s Befriending Story","\u003Cp>At the beginning of 2019, Mary was considering voluntary work when she came across an advert looking for volunteer befrienders in her local area.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had thought about doing voluntary work. I thought, maybe I should do something – something that would be a bit different for me, but I hadn’t done anything about it. I saw on Facebook that Aberlour were looking for Befrienders and filled in the application. I just thought maybe I could give someone some company or help them, and it would be good for me to meet someone new too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>After completing volunteer training, Mary was matched with a 15-year-old girl in May 2019. Together they do lots of different activities such as baking, playing board games, going for picnics, or just going for a walk and talking together. Though these activities, Mary is building a supportive and nurturing relationship with her befriendee and having a positive impact on her life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“One day when I arrived, there was a lot going on in the house. She wasn’t in a good mood and didn’t want to do anything. We decided to walk to ASDA. Just the change and getting out had a great impact on her. It was the best thing we could have done.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Mary and her befriendee have developed a great relationship together:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“We have a good rapport with each other. She’ll chat away and tell me different things. She’s quite open and I’m happy to listen to her talk – until she tells me I’m being too quiet! When we’re driving in the car she gets to be in charge of the radio – we turn the music up loud and have a sing song! We’ve built up trust between us. We have a routine and I wouldn’t let her down – she trusts that I’ll always come when I say I will”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“What I enjoy most about the befriending is her company, I look forward to seeing her. She always seems keen to see me too, and she likes to make sure that our next visit is written in my diary. I think she likes that she is in my diary.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I would definitely recommend others to become befrienders, it’s really worthwhile.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you change a life and become an Aberlour befriender? We have opportunities available throughout the country \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>find out more>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-11-06T00:00:00.000000Z","Mary's Befriending Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FMary_Web.jpg",{"id":383,"author_id":19,"slug":384,"is_featured":7,"title":385,"content":386,"content_overview":10,"published_at":387,"seo_title":388,"seo_description":389,"image":390,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":306},36,"ross-mentoring-story","Ross’ Mentoring Story","\u003Cp>Ross is a volunteer mentor with \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-attain-mentoring-service-renfrewshire\u002F\">Aberlour Attain – Renfrewshire\u003C\u002Fa> and currently supports a young person within his local area. Find out why Ross wished to become a mentor and about the process he completed to become one.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Ross’ Volunteer Mentoring Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>My name is Ross. I am from Paisley and I have been a Mentor with Aberlour since February 2019.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I was looking for a volunteering role in an organisation that worked with children and young people as I wanted to further increase my life experiences, bolster my CV for greater career prospects and give back to the community I live in. When I came across the role with Aberlour I knew this would be the perfect opportunity.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I enquired about the role by contacting one of the mentoring coordinators. He gave me some more information and organised a meet up for an informal chat and to iron out more details about this fantastic opportunity. He was extremely friendly and really welcoming. This made me feel even more excited about taking on the mentoring role.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Training\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>We soon got into training where I got to meet my fellow mentors. Despite a lot of information being put forward it never felt as if it was too overwhelming. There are six compulsory training sessions, as well a couple of online modules to complete and of course further optional training available too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The team that organised the training were great and really took time and effort to make sure we were equipped and ready to carry out the role.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Highlights\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I have many highlights with Aberlour already: meeting the coordinators, meeting my mentee and the training itself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The biggest highlight happened fairly recently. My mentee had a number of difficult issues to deal with at school however, in our most recent meeting he told me things were improving and he was just trying to get his head down and make better choices. He also mentioned that he really had a great time hanging out with me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We then proceeded to make a lot of plans for the weeks ahead, so we have plenty activities to look forward to. This was a real positive moment for me: it makes me feel that I am starting to make somewhat of a difference.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Not every meeting has gone so smoothly. My mentee mentioned to me recently that school had become problematic again. We spoke about everything that happened that week and how he could work on turning this around.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My mentee has shown some great progress, so I do hope we can keep going in this positive upwards trajectory. I have spoken with my coordinator about this and they have given me some techniques and some great advice on how to combat days like that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>The difference you can make is immeasurable\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>My advice to someone that was thinking about applying for the role: there is a great support network at Aberlour; you would be really looked after in the role and if you have a spare couple of hours a week it would definitely be worth your time.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It can be fun and really enjoyable but there are some tougher days. The good days outnumber the bad and if you have the drive and the enthusiasm to help a young person then I think there is a real chance for you to gain incredible benefits for yourself, and of course the difference you could potentially make to a young person’s life would be immeasurable.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more about becoming an Aberlour Volunteer>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-07-10T00:00:00.000000Z","Ross' Mentoring Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Ross is a volunteer mentor with Aberlour Attain - Renfrewshire and currently supports a young person within his local area. Find out why Ross wished to become a mentor and about the process he completed to become one.","media\u002FRoss_AberlourAttain_Mentor.jpg",{"id":392,"author_id":19,"slug":393,"is_featured":7,"title":394,"content":395,"content_overview":10,"published_at":396,"seo_title":397,"seo_description":398,"image":399,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},37,"sophies-volunteer-befriender-story","Sophie’s Befriender Story","\u003Cp>Sophie, a 19 year old student, started volunteering in November 2017. She came across Aberlour through an online search for voluntary opportunities in her local area, hoping to develop her skills and experience to accompany her university studies:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I wanted to volunteer in order to gain greater experience of working with individuals with disabilities, increase my own self-confidence and to develop a greater understanding of the challenges that many young adults with disabilities may face. I felt these experiences would be beneficial in my studies and future career.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sophie volunteers as a befriender, meaning she meets with a young person regularly to engage in social activities and help to develop their skills, confidence and self-esteem in a person-centred way:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was attracted to Aberlour because of their underpinning values which situate the service-user at the centre of all they do. A usual day befriending involves my befriendee choosing activities, things like reading books, puzzles or listening to CD’s, or going out to his community disco or shopping. One of his favourite activities is Skittles. He will either play with the intention of knocking all the skittles down or, if in a humorous mood, will not aim and laugh at how far off his throw was.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sophie has developed a positive relationship with her befriendee:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I think what I enjoy most about volunteering is being able to build a relationship with him and seeing it develop over a period of time. We now both look forward to our visits and never leave without having laughed. I believe he finds my regular visits enjoyable and looks forward to them. Having maintained a person-centred approach throughout, I hope this will have made him feel a greater sense of empowerment and confidence.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Volunteering has also allowed Sophie to succeed in developing her own skills:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Since beginning volunteering, I have increased communication skills which have provided me with a greater sense of confidence when working with others. Volunteering is definitely a worthwhile experience in which you will gain just as much from volunteering as the person you are working with.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more about volunteering with Aberlour>>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-07-08T00:00:00.000000Z","Sophie's Befriender Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Sophie, a 19 year old student, started volunteering in November 2017. She came across Aberlour through an online search for voluntary opportunities in her local area, hoping to develop her skills and experience to accompany her university studies.","media\u002FSophie_Volunteer_Stock_Web.jpg","2024-11-25T08:28:23.000000Z",{"id":402,"author_id":19,"slug":403,"is_featured":7,"title":404,"content":405,"content_overview":10,"published_at":406,"seo_title":407,"seo_description":408,"image":409,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},38,"claires-volunteering-story","Claire’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>Claire began her volunteering experience with Aberlour over ten years ago.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“At the time I was working within Youth Clubs with groups. I was looking to get some experience working one to one with young people, and I thought Aberlour was a good organisation. I felt that the work they did was very important, and that they also provided good support to volunteers”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Claire volunteers as a Befriender with Aberlour Sycamore Residential Services, and has been matched with three girls during her time volunteering with Aberlour:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I have been matched with my current befriendee – my third young person – since she was in Primary 7. We usually go out once a month, for something to eat and an activity of her choosing. When she was younger, we did thinks like crazy golf or bowling and she would come to the youth club. Now she is older, we do things like shopping or get our nails done.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Claire highlights that it’s not the activity that matters the most, but the time spent together:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I would say it’s the talking that is what has been the most important thing. Being able to support her and share things I went through at her age to help her know she was not alone. I could empathise with her. She could talk to me about anything and I would listen. We have built up trust and developed a good bond.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Over the last year, Claire has supported her befriendee through her first pregnancy and preparing for her baby arriving:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve enjoyed seeing my befriendee grow over the last year and develop as a young adult. She’s recently had a baby, I’ve enjoyed supporting her through her pregnancy and have been given advice by the Aberlour Perinatal Befriending Service. Due to COVID-19 I’ve not been able to see her, and the plans for supporting her following the birth of her first child haven’t been able to happen but we’ve been keeping in touch.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Through befriending, Claire has developed her own skills and experience:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Volunteering is extremely rewarding and great experience if you are looking for a role working with young people. You don’t need to know what to do or what activities are in your area because you will learn, there is lots of support from staff and other volunteers.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s been amazing to be part of my befriendee’s life for all that time and we’ve been through her highs and lows together. She had taught me a lot and I love spending time with her.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“She knows I’ll be around for her as long as she wants me to be, even when she moved on from Aberlour.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-06-27T00:00:00.000000Z","Claire's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Claire volunteers as a Befriender with Aberlour Sycamore Residential Services, and has been matched with three girls during her 10 years volunteering with Aberlour.","media\u002Fclaire.jpeg",{"id":411,"author_id":19,"slug":412,"is_featured":7,"title":413,"content":414,"content_overview":10,"published_at":415,"seo_title":416,"seo_description":417,"image":418,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},39,"angelas-volunteering-story","Angela’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>I had already volunteered with Aberlour in the past and when I saw the advert for perinatal befriendingI knew this was something I wanted to do because I recognised this was a service that I myself would have benefited from 20 years ago.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>My volunteering Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>When I became pregnant for the third time I was in a very vulnerable position. I had experienced a miscarriage a few months previously. My husband was in the forces and we were told we were moving to another part of the country. I found myself very isolated with a toddler. Unable to work as I had no family support network. My self-esteem was very low and I had a very anxious pregnancy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My son was born prematurely at 29 weeks gestation. My saving grace was my Health Visitor who took the time to listen to my experiences and how they had impacted on my mental health. She visited me regularly and put me in touch with another local older mum who understood my anxieties about my baby and my worries of my husband now being in a war zone. I recognised the support I had all those years ago was almost an informal befriending service and I was at a stage in my life where I could give something back.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I found the Perinatal Befriender training empowering. I gained a huge amount of knowledge about perinatal mental illness, brain development and attachment, and the importance of “just listening”. At the same time I also found it quite a raw experience as it brought to the fore many of my past emotions and experiences. But, I have to say it also helped me to make sense of the feelings I had, had as a new mum 20 years before. The support from the co-ordinators throughout the training was invaluable as I felt I could trust them and discuss any concerns openly. I felt I wanted to be a part of this team and was made to feel I was playing a very important role in becoming a befriender to the women and families. The learning, support and trust gained gave me the confidence to feel I was able to make a difference.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I have had three long term befriending matches each of them very different and I find it almost spooky how Angie and Catherine have been able to get each one so right. I have enjoyed seeing the families I have been matched with grow in confidence with their parenting skills, overcome their anxieties and believe in themselves. One of my proudest moments was seeing a mum I was matched with initiating a conversation with another mum in a café. This was a major step for her and I felt a sense of pride in seeing her achieve this.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Since becoming a perinatal befriender I feel I have become more confident in myself. My husband and I have become fosters carers. We wanted to care for children from 0 – 7 years old because I felt the knowledge I gained from befriending made me realise the importance of these early years in children’s development. My perinatal experiences have taught me how to be more attuned to recognising the behaviours and needs of the children placed in our care and how best to support them. This has also had an impact on my family as a whole as I can see my two boys develop into very confident caring young men. I have come a long way in my journey and I believe I can manage anything………..and my premature baby is now a 6ft rugby player, studying law, who works part time in Mothercare!\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you become an Aberlour volunteer?\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-06-06T00:00:00.000000Z","Angela's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","I had already volunteered with Aberlour in the past and when I saw the advert for Perinatal Befriending I knew this was something I wanted to do. Could you become an Aberlour volunteer?","media\u002FAngela-1.jpeg",{"id":420,"author_id":19,"slug":421,"is_featured":7,"title":422,"content":423,"content_overview":10,"published_at":424,"seo_title":425,"seo_description":426,"image":427,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},40,"samanthas-story","Samantha’s Story","\u003Cp>15-year-old Samantha lives in one of our Aberlour Sycamore houses in Fife. She has been supported by Caitlyn since she moved into the house over a year ago. Samantha tells her story, explains how Caitlyn supports her and why she nominated Caitlyn for Residential Superstar of the Year at the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.celcis.org\u002Ftraining-and-events\u002Fsircc-residential-child-care-awards-2019\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Scottish Institute for Residential Child Care (SIRCC) Awards\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>My Story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>I haven’t lived with my mum since I was 9 years old. She is blind so couldn’t quite look after me properly. I then went to live with my Auntie. It wasn’t great, we had a very volatile relationship. We don’t get on. It didn’t work.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I wanted to move into care. I used to think ‘any place would be better than being at home.’ I had been on respite breaks in the past to get away from my Auntie, but I didn’t move into the Aberlour Sycamore house until I was 14 years old. That’s when I met Caitlyn.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The reality of moving into residential care wasn’t what I thought it was going to be. I used to watch ‘The Dumping Ground’ on TV and I thought it was going to be like that. But when I came here, I realised it wasn’t all Tracey Beaker, it wasn’t just a song and dance. This is now my life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I wasn’t Caitlyn’s best friend on my first day. But she never gave up on me. I was scared to like her or get attached to her because everyone I have ever liked in past has left me. Together from my first day in the house we built our relationship and she became my silent cheerleader, the person always rooting for me to do my best and has my best interests at heart.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Caitlyn helps me with everything. But she has really helped me at school. Before moving into the house, I had a really broken education. I had been asked to leave school and only saw a teacher for 2 hours a day in a social work office. When I first moved in Caitlyn and I went to the Aberlour Sycamore Nurturing Hub, then within a couple of months I was in High School full time studying for my National 4 exams.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Caitlyn helps me to focus at school and not to get distracted. Caitlyn helped me to improve my grades so I could apply for college. She sits there, almost like a safety blanket. Sometimes school gets too much; I want to leave at times but Caitlyn being there allows me to take part in class when I wouldn’t have done that before.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>She also helps me with the social part of school as I always struggled with that. She has helped me to know what is socially acceptable and what is not socially acceptable at break. Like what to say and what not to say in front of my peers. It is tough for me as sometimes I just want to shout.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I see Caitlyn like my mum; she is really important to me and I feel like part of a family. I am looking forward to the summer as I have a few trips planned and I am getting an award from the Girls’ Brigade. Then in September I will be going to college to study my National 5’s in English, maths and psychology. I wouldn’t have been able to apply for that without Caitlyn’s help. Without her helping me to focus and work hard, to achieve what I want to do in my life. I am looking forward to it as she will be there with me in college like in school, she will be there to help me with everything.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As a thank you to Caitlyn I nominated her to be Residential Superstar of the Year at the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.celcis.org\u002Ftraining-and-events\u002Fsircc-residential-child-care-awards-2019\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Scottish Institute for Residential Child Care (SIRCC) Awards\u003C\u002Fa>. She has been helping me so much, she deserves to win. My proudest moment yet has been to have the confidence to nominate Caitlyn. To tell other people how I felt and then to send it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-06-04T00:00:00.000000Z","Samantha's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","15-year-old Samantha lives in one of our Aberlour Sycamore houses in Fife. She has been supported by Caitlyn since she moved into the house over a year ago. Samantha tells her story, explaining how Caitlyn supports her and why she nominated her as Residential Superstar of the Year at the Scottish Institute for Residential Child Care (SIRCC) Awards 2019.","media\u002FSamanta_Banner.jpg",{"id":429,"author_id":19,"slug":430,"is_featured":7,"title":431,"content":432,"content_overview":10,"published_at":433,"seo_title":434,"seo_description":435,"image":436,"story_type_id":14,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},41,"jakkis-volunteering-story","Jakki’s Volunteering Story","\u003Cp>Jakki applied to volunteer at the end of 2018. Although working full time, Jakki felt that she had some spare time on her hands since her children were now older. Jakki had been looking for a voluntary opportunity when she saw a post on social media.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>My Volunteering Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“I hadn’t heard of Aberlour before. I found out about the opportunity of Befriender when one of my friends posted about it on Facebook. When I read about the charity, it seemed really worthwhile and it was going to be local as well. I was thinking about volunteering and it was just a stroke of luck that I saw it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My ex-husband was brought up in residential care. He didn’t have a good experience and so I knew it would make a difference to someone’s life. I felt like I had more time to give, and that if you are in a position to give something back, you should.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Jakki was matched with an 11-year old boy in Aberlour’s Sycamore service in February 2019:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“We do lots of different things like football and tennis, and I try to encourage healthy options. He’s always pleased to see me when I arrive at the house, he rushes away to get his coat and shoes on. He’s still getting to know me, but we’ve had no issues and I hope it continues the way it is. I already feel the Befriending is very rewarding.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Staff have noticed that Jakki’s Befriendee always has a smile when he talks about Jakki:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I asked for a Befriender and the adults helped choose someone that liked the same things as me. Jakki came and the first thing she told me was that she loved Celtic. I liked her straight away, we always go to play football and go to the park. I really enjoy it and one day I went to get lunch with her too. She is nice and I get on with her.” [Befriendee]\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Jakki is now empowering others to get involved, with her daughter also running the Edinburgh half marathon to fundraise for Aberlour. Jakki would recommend others to volunteer with Aberlour:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’m really glad I saw that link on Facebook and applied when I did. It’s exactly the type of thing I was looking for. I try to encourage others to do the same, like my sister and my friend, because it’s such a great thing to do for children. I hope it does make a difference having me there for him and that he feels more special.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you become an Aberlour volunteer?\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-06-03T00:00:00.000000Z","Jakki's Volunteering Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Jakki applied to volunteer at the end of 2018. Although working full time, Jakki felt that she had some spare time on her hands since her children were now older. Jakki had been looking for a voluntary opportunity when she saw a post on social media.Could you change a life by becoming an Aberlour volunteer?","media\u002FJakki.jpeg",{"id":438,"author_id":19,"slug":439,"is_featured":7,"title":440,"content":441,"content_overview":10,"published_at":433,"seo_title":442,"seo_description":443,"image":444,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},42,"lyndons-volunteer-story","Lyndon’s Volunteer Story","\u003Cp>Lyndon is a Residential Worker within \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fsycamore\u002F\">Aberlour’s Highland Sycamore services.\u003C\u002Fa> In September 2017, Lyndon applied to volunteer with Aberlour after seeing an advert online. With previous experience of working with children in a residential setting, Lyndon was looking for the right opportunity to use his skills again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>My Volunteering Story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>“I hadn’t heard of Aberlour. I’d previously worked for private companies in England, but I saw that Aberlour was a charity and thought, ‘perfect, that’s what I’m looking for.’”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lyndon began his role as an Activity Buddy Volunteer in the summer of 2018, and quickly developed positive relationships with both children and staff members alike:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was helping to build a summer house, the children got involved and it sparked their curiosity. I’ve also been teaching some of the children guitar and one child has really taken to it. It was almost meant to be. The children are teaching me something too – they teach me about their game systems, and we have a good laugh. It improves your communication too – kids speak a different language so you’re in the loop!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Rhonda Wilson, Head of Residential in the Highlands, explains the impact Lyndon has had on the children:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Lyndon was a fantastic role model especially for the boys in our care as the team are predominately female. Lyndon taught one of our boys to play the guitar, which had a calming effect on our young man. This also brought his confidence out, with our young man continuing to use music as a therapeutic tool. Although Lyndon is now a team member in another house, he continues to visit our children, to continue his relationships.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>For Lyndon, volunteering with Aberlour was the step back into working with children he was looking for:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Volunteering with Aberlour has rekindled my enthusiasm, and I remembered how much satisfaction you can get from working with children. I enjoy being part of a team in Aberlour, it’s like a family. It’s nice to be sitting down at a table over a meal, talking about different things and feeding the children’s curiosity and imagination. It’s nice to be involved and accepted as part of the family.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Now a highly valued member of staff, Lyndon still advocates for volunteering within Aberlour:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I do reflect on what I’ve done. Volunteering in general is good for the soul and gives you a feeling money can’t buy. For me, kicking around a football with a child brought out my youth, my energy and my enthusiasm. I would 100% recommend others to volunteer.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Even making a difference to one person’s life – that’s a step in the right direction.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you become an Aberlour volunteer? \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Lyndon's Volunteer Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Lyndon applied to volunteer with Aberlour after seeing an advert online. With previous experience of working with children in a residential setting, Lyndon was looking for the right opportunity to use his skills again. Could you become an Aberlour Volunteer?","media\u002FLyndon_Harrison_Volunteer.jpg",{"id":446,"author_id":19,"slug":447,"is_featured":7,"title":448,"content":449,"content_overview":10,"published_at":433,"seo_title":450,"seo_description":451,"image":452,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},43,"liahs-volunteer-story","Liah’s Volunteer Story","\u003Cp>Liah volunteers as a Mentor with \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fyouthpoint-moray\u002F\">Aberlour Youthpoint – Moray\u003C\u002Fa>, a service designed to support children and young people facing challenges and struggles in life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>My volunteering Story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>“I found out about the mentoring role through \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.skillsdevelopmentscotland.co.uk\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Skills Development Scotland\u003C\u002Fa>. I was looking to get some experience in supporting young people for my future career prospects, and Aberlour was recommended to me.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Liah began volunteering as a mentor in January 2018, when she was matched with a young person in need of support and guidance. Volunteer mentors give children and young people someone to talk to about their worries, and to practise social skills with:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I support a young person on a fortnightly basis. We visit different places locally, or we get crafty, or even just go for a chat and some food. We have visited Bow Fiddle Rock, a famous local landmark. She had heard of it, and had drawn it, but had never been to visit.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Liah has noticed positive changes in the young person she mentors:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The young person I mentor has gained her confidence back, and her school attendance has improved massively. I believe that her mental health has improved and she is more socially included in the community. I think that it has helped her Dad too, as he knows she can confide in me about things that she may be keeping to herself.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I enjoy seeing how far my young person has come, and what she is achieving now. I enjoy the feel-good factor I get from helping someone, and it helps to develop my confidence. It also gets me out of the house and enjoying social time too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Volunteering has helped Liah to work towards her own goals too, and has progress in her own career:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As I initially joined Aberlour to help with my career prospects, it did massively play a part in me gaining a role as a Support Worker. I have my foot in the door of the Health and Social Care sector, but I continue to enjoy volunteering and helping this young person with her confidence and enjoying life.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I would highly recommend volunteering to others. It not only helps these young people in many aspects, but it has so many benefits for us as volunteers too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you become an Aberlour volunteer? \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fvolunteer\u002F\">\u003Cstrong>Find out more.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Liah's Volunteer Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Liah volunteers as a Mentor with Aberlour Youthpoint - Moray, a service designed to support children and young people facing challenges and struggles in life. Could your become a volunteer and change a local young person's life?","media\u002FLiah_Jeffery_Volunteer.jpg",{"id":454,"author_id":19,"slug":455,"is_featured":7,"title":456,"content":457,"content_overview":10,"published_at":458,"seo_title":459,"seo_description":460,"image":461,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},44,"kerries-story","Kerrie’s Story","\u003Cp>Kerrie has been working with the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-family-support-service-glasgow\u002F\">Aberlour Family Support Service\u003C\u002Fa> in Glasgow since she left her abusive partner. Find out from her how the team are helping her to feel safe and be confident moving into the future.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>my story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>About 1 year ago my health visitor introduced me to Aberlour as I was just leaving my abusive partner. My doctor and health visitor used the 6-week scan of my second baby as the opportunity for me and my two kids to escape.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As we had to leave our family home I stayed with my family for a month or so before moving into a woman’s aid refuge. That didn’t really suit me as my family couldn’t come visit so I managed to get temporary accommodation with the council. That flat was ideal as it was across the road from where I grew up and my family were close by. That is when I started working with Diane as she helped me to get a more permanent home for me and the kids.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I meet with Diane weekly, which is amazing as talking with her has really helped with my confidence in the house with the kids and I am now feeling more confident going out and about as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When we first met, I was in financial crisis. The first thing Diane did was help me to work out the money I had coming in and what I had going out. She helped me to contact the job centre to make sure the benefits I was receiving were correct. She has taught me all about safety, ensuring I ask who it is when they buzz at the door before letting them into the building, keeping my door locked at all times, and checking the peep hole to make sure I am letting who I buzzed into the building into my flat.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Diane is always there to offer advice and helps me when I visit my lawyer. As I am a victim of domestic abuse, she let me know I can apply for compensation due to my injuries. I wouldn’t have known this was available to me, so she is helping me progress this with the lawyer. Not only is she helping me with that, she has helped me to register on the \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.mygov.scot\u002Fafter-the-verdict\u002Fvictim-notification-schemes\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Victim Notification Scheme\u003C\u002Fa>, which again I didn’t know existed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When we first moved into my flat, I had nothing. Diane helped me access the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Furgentassistancefund\u002F\">Aberlour Urgent Assistance Fund\u003C\u002Fa> to buy items for my house. She also helped me to get a double pram for the kids as my old one broke.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Recently I discovered that my ex-partners family live in my block of flats and also live in the block next door. That has really knocked my confidence as I don’t feel safe. I am worried that they will tell my ex-partner where I am and come and get me and the kids. When I told Diane this, she let me know that I can apply for a new home, one away from his family. We are now working with the local housing association for me to get a new house. I am really looking forward to that as I want to put down roots for me and the kids and create a safe home where they can grow.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I really couldn’t have done any of this without the support of Diane and Aberlour. I wouldn’t have known where to begin. By talking to Diane about my experience it is helping me to deal with it and move on. Now I am more confident, I am looking forward to the future and building a safe stable environment for my children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-05-30T00:00:00.000000Z","Kerrie's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","The Aberlour Family Support Service has been supporting Kerrie and her two children to feel safe and confident for the future. Read her full story on our website.","media\u002FKerrie_FamilyServiceGlasgow_Web.jpg",{"id":463,"author_id":19,"slug":464,"is_featured":7,"title":465,"content":466,"content_overview":10,"published_at":467,"seo_title":468,"seo_description":469,"image":470,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},45,"fayes-story","Faye’s Story","\u003Cp>Bubbly Faye is 19 years old, she is non-verbal and has a learning disability. She lives at home with Mum, Susan, Dad, John, and her three older siblings.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>Faye’s Story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>“Faye was born on the day of the eclipse in August 1999, it was a special day all round for us.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Dad, John, goes on to explain:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As Faye is transitioning from school into adult services, she recently turned 19, we have had to really think about the support Faye needs moving forward. She needs physical support for safety when she is out and about. She is celiac, so we need people to be aware of that so everything and anything she eats is safe for her. She can’t be outside on her own as she has no concept of road safety or anything like that or going off with strangers. She needs help with her personal hygiene and going to the bathroom. She needs someone around, you wouldn’t say it has to be one to one or that intensive, but she needs support with pretty much everything that she does.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It sounds like a lot, but she is quite a sociable wee person.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Faye did also come to the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-borders\u002F\">Aberlour Options\u003C\u002Fa> house for respite, but as she is now over 18 that isn’t available anymore. However, the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-adventures\u002F\">adventures\u003C\u002Fa> are so much more and meet Faye’s needs better.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>The aberlour options adventures are so much more and meet Faye’s needs better\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“I don’t know if the staff are volunteers or paid but some of them are around about Faye’s age and they go to the same school as her in-fact. It is great for her, we can do pretty much anything, but you don’t want to be with your Mum and Dad all the time, do you? She gets loads from that independence. It is really good activities that she gets to go to like theatre trips, horse riding, outward bound adventure places. I mean we can do it, but it is much nicer to be picked up in the mini bus in the morning which is quite exciting for her as she gets to see who is there, she has a wee check to see where she will sit. It is about giving her independence and social time from our point of view.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Every adventure has been different. But the one we are most proud of is when she went in the light aircraft flying\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>Mum, Susan, further explains:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“As John said, I think some of the helpers that go know Faye from school. It is nice for them to see her being independent. Faye is well known in school and likeable; she doesn’t have behavioural problems. People can’t resist walking by her giving her a pat on the head, a hug or a high five.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The first time Faye went away with \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-adventures\u002F\">Aberlour Options Adventures\u003C\u002Fa> Jan booked accommodation and they went to an outward-bound centre near Edinburgh. That was the first time Faye has been able to access things like that on her own. She has been outward bounding but with her Mum and Dad. To head off in the minibus with the full gang was fab and she had a great time. I thought ‘how Faye will cope? Will Jan get her to bed?’ Now we don’t have to worry about things like that.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Every adventure has been different. But the one we are most proud of is when she went in the light aircraft flying, she would never get to go do that or access that without Jan and Aberlour. As a family you can go to things but to go in a group is just completely different and to go independently with help is amazing. And I mean she is 19, she shouldn’t be having her Mum and Dad hanging on to her. She certainly loves it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>The adventure away isn’t just good for Faye, it gives John and Susan some time together.\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>Susan explains why the adventure is good for the whole family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It is a huge undertaking to trust someone. To send your child off with them, but the reward for Faye is huge. So you have to work at that gradually be it an afternoon initially or a couple of hours and build it up. But what you get back for Faye is amazing and, we get a wee bit time together, which we very much appreciate.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Faye is now so familiar with the routine when she is going on an adventure. If they are going away on a Friday, we have to pick her up from school a little bit early and we get her all changed and her bags ready, she loves her bag. She looks for the minibus and as soon as she hears the doorbell ring, which is either Jan or one of the helpers, she shows her excitement, grabs her bag and off she goes, she doesn’t look back.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Adventures enables young individuals to be recognised as individuals and have a ball with life\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“And because all the adventures are different, she is learning. It is varied accommodation and activities, so all the young people are learning and accessing new skills themselves. Knowing it is ok because ‘I have got my helpers here, I know where the bathroom is, what do I need to learn about this place?’ That is a big learning curve for people as well, going to different places.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Everybody should be able to access activities to the best of their ability. If Faye didn’t have the Aberlour Options Adventures, she could become very isolated, withdrawn, in her own at home with only her parents. That is the reality, and she won’t get these opportunities at all. Adventures enables young individuals to be recognised as individuals and access activities and have a ball with life. And that is what Aberlour Options Adventures allows them to do.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-05-24T00:00:00.000000Z","Faye's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Bubbly Faye is 19 years old, she is non-verbal and has a learning disability. She lives at home with Mum, Susan, Dad, John, and her three older siblings. Find out from our mum and dad how important Aberlour Options Adventures are to their daughters life.","media\u002FFS-driving-boat_WEB.png",{"id":472,"author_id":19,"slug":473,"is_featured":7,"title":474,"content":475,"content_overview":10,"published_at":467,"seo_title":476,"seo_description":477,"image":478,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},46,"lucys-story","Lucy’s Story","\u003Cp>Sociable and bubbly Lucy is 14 years old, she has downs syndrome and lives at home with Mum, Nicola, and Dad, Steven.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Nicola explains the support her daughter requires:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Lucy needs help with being reminded to go to the toilet, with personal care and with her medication. She needs someone to be there as she can wander, she can get up during the night and wander through the house and I can often find her in the early hours of the morning on her iPad. Or if the doors aren’t locked, she will leave the house on her own.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>A few years ago, due to strains on family life, Nicola, looked into further support and respite options that were available to her family. She was then introduced to \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-adventures\u002F\">Aberlour Options Adventures\u003C\u002Fa> by Jan.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Aberlour Options Adventures was an ideal solution for Lucy.\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>Nicola explains:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The social aspect and the experiences Lucy gains from an adventure are vital. She is 14 years old, so she is at a stage where she wants to try different things and meet and socialise with people. And these are things I want her to experience. If Lucy was a neuro-typical child, she would be getting these experiences through school and clubs. But because she isn’t a neuro-typical child there aren’t many opportunities for her and a lot of these activities I have to support her with.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“However, by going away on an Adventure with Jan and the team, a team I absolutely trust, who know my daughter and the support she needs, she gets to try new activities and go away on residentials with a group of children that are equally as able as her and as sociable as her. She is getting these experiences without her mum in the background. She gets to hang out with her friends.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Recently Lucy had to miss out on a few adventures due to an overhaul in the local authority respite service.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>“Lucy missed out on adventures as there has been an overhaul in the system and the way that the council were allocating support. The criteria changed and Lucy was deemed not to be eligible for the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fself-directed-support\u002F\">direct payment\u003C\u002Fa> I was getting so this stopped. It meant we only had four respite sessions within the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-borders\u002F\">Aberlour Options\u003C\u002Fa> house which are absolutely brilliant, but they weren’t meeting her social needs. Lucy is really out going and often during these house stays she is with non-verbal and non-mobile children. Lucy needs more than that, so I felt that she was going around with an adult instead of being sociable with other children or her peers. So, she was missing out on a lot by not attending the adventures.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Nicola, with the help of Jan, campaigned to ensure Lucy can attend adventures again. Thankfully the local authority has now agreed for this support to be returned to the family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“At the end of the day Lucy is 14, she isn’t a little girl who wants her mum on top of her all the time, and at home we have to have the doors locked as she takes off to go to my mums. I have to keep the doors locked to keep her safe. I have to keep an eye on her all the time as she puts things in the microwave and switches them on. So attending an adventure with her friend lets her be independent in a safe space, it is letting her be her.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“She loves attending the adventures and has an absolute ball. She is always buzzing when she comes home and can’t wait to tell us everything, she has gotten up too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Aberlour Options Adventures not only provides a vital service for Lucy, but also for Nicola and Steven.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>“It means that my husband and I, can have sometime because he works nights so sometimes he is away for work before we come in from school and sometimes we are away to school before he comes in. I am basically a single parent most of the time. We don’t get a lot of time. It offers valuable time for us as a couple.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Adventures allows families to have respite time, it is a life saver sometimes for some families. Because you struggle on day to day to day and then you have this time – you drop them off, you know that they are safe, you know that they are happy, you know that their needs are being met and they are fulfilled in what they are doing. And you can quite happily go to the cinema, go for a meal out knowing that she is well cared for. It is just brilliant.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Adventures provides inclusion, as everyone is doing the same activities at the same time. It is like a wee holiday for Lucy and her friends which is a really valuable experience for them. It really makes such a difference.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Lucy's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Sociable and bubbly Lucy is 14 years old, she has downs syndrome and lives at home with Mum, Nicola, and Dad, Steven. Nicola explains why Aberlour Options Adventures is vital to her daughters growth and helping her be independent.","media\u002FLucy_OptionsAdventures.jpg",{"id":480,"author_id":19,"slug":481,"is_featured":7,"title":482,"content":483,"content_overview":10,"published_at":484,"seo_title":485,"seo_description":486,"image":487,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":400},47,"rhonda-and-gordons-story","Rhonda and Gordon’s Story","\u003Cp>Entering the world of fostering can be a whirlwind of excitement and apprehension. Taking the step to foster a child with a disability can be an even larger learning curve – but completely worth the adventure.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>our fostering story\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>Gordon and Rhonda decided to take a route into foster care after Gordon was made redundant.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I suggested we could look after people’s dogs when the owners were on holiday and then we looked into fostering. Gordon was keener on the fostering than looking after dogs,” laughs Rhonda. “That’s when we started to look in to it seriously.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>WELCOME HOME\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>In November 2016, after an intensive application process, Gordon and Rhonda became foster carers. Working with Aberlour, the couple received an immense amount of guidance and training from the service – which is dedicated to supporting the lives of children, young people and families across Scotland.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Several months after becoming foster carers, Mark* joined their family. At first there had been some difficulties in placing Mark due to his additional needs, which include epilepsy, autism, global developmental delay and incontinence issues. However, Mark soon settled into his home with Gordon and Rhonda.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Even though he’s 10, he has the functioning age of three. He still likes Thomas the Tank Engine, Peppa Pig and Minions. The house is full of toys,” says Rhonda. Through their time together the couple have seen the progression Mark has made as he grows up. “Seeing a child come on and develop so much is so rewarding. To know that a lot of it is down to yourself is amazing,” she says.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>LEARNING\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>The joy of watching Mark grow and learn, and caring for someone with a disability can be a golden opportunity to realise more about yourself and others. Both Rhonda and Gordon learned so much about themselves.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>She explains: “We had to dig deep and discover patience. I think going through the fostering process you have to get to know yourself quite well, too, and not be judgemental in any way. It’s important not to judge the children’s parents for putting their kids into care because some of the parents can’t cope with children with disabilities, especially if they’ve got their own problems. ”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>With the support of Aberlour, Gordon and Rhonda have not only learned more about themselves, gained new skills and experience, but have also welcomed the joy and love of a new member of their family. It has been an exciting adventure so far with a lot more to come.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Becoming a foster carer means you become a safety blanket for a child or young person in need of love and nurturing care. For those thinking of going into fostering it is imperative to work closely with the fostering service to ensure you are matched with a person that you can provide the accurate support for.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Think carefully because it’s not for everybody,” advises Rhonda. “Everybody has their strengths and weaknesses and they have to take that into consideration.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you change a future? \u003Ca href=\"\u002Ffoster-care\">Contact our team today for more information\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Name changed to protect identity\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-05-22T00:00:00.000000Z","Rhonda and Gordon's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Entering the world of fostering can be a whirlwind of excitement and apprehension. Taking the step to foster a child with a disability can be an even larger learning curve – but completely worth the adventure.","media\u002FGordon-and-Rhonda_WEB2.jpg",{"id":489,"author_id":19,"slug":490,"is_featured":7,"title":491,"content":492,"content_overview":10,"published_at":493,"seo_title":494,"seo_description":495,"image":496,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":305,"updated_at":497},48,"alisons-fostering-story","Alison’s Fostering Story","\u003Cp>Meet Thomas and Alison, they have been \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffostering\">foster carers with Aberlour\u003C\u002Fa> for 12 years. Alison shares their story of why they become foster carers and why others should too.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>\u003Cstrong>Our Fostering Story\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>No Child Should Stay In A Residential Unit\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I can vividly remember when I decided I wanted to become a foster carer. When I was 14 years old, my aunt died. My uncle couldn’t cope so my young cousin was taken into care and ended up staying in a residential unit. I remember going to visit her and thinking ‘oh god, I wouldn’t want to stay here.’ After that I made the decision that I would become a foster carer when I was older. I thought no child should stay in a residential unit like that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Then when my daughter turned 5 and my son was 7, my husband and I decided it was time to foster. My children are now 34 and 37. Now in her thirties, my daughter can’t actually remember a time when I didn’t foster.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Thomas and I have been fostering for 29 years, 12 of which have been with Aberlour. I think we have fostered around 70 children over the years, if not more.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>Aberlour’s Support Is Second To None\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>We are currently full-time foster carers and have a 15-year-old boy staying with us at the moment. Aberlour’s support is second to none, it really is the best. They have a fantastic on call support service. Within 30 minutes of phoning the team someone will be in your house, helping you. They are there if you need them. You can get challenging behaviour but with Aberlour they are always there, nothing is a problem. We all sit down as a team and try and sort it out.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour support and involve your whole family throughout the fostering process. For example, today Aberlour will keep in touch with my biological grandchildren who I provide child care for. Aberlour asks them how they get on with the foster children I look after to make sure there is no negative behaviour impacting on them. Aberlour include your biological family in all trips or parties to ensure everyone feels included. Not only have my family embraced the foster children into our family but Aberlour has embraced my family into their family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>The Children We Have Looked After Will Always Have Us As A Family\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I’m very lucky, most of the children I have fostered keep in touch with me. I still get Easter and Christmas cards from babies that I looked after 20 years ago that were adopted. I still get cards sent to me from their families with up to date pictures and things.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>With Thomas and I, the children we have looked after will always have us as a family. Someone who remembers them, who has memories of them growing up. All the children I have looked after from Aberlour still visit on a regular basis.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am very proud of one of the girls we have looked after since she was 3; sadly her mum could no longer look after her as she had Huntington’s disease. When she was a teenager Aberlour contacted her with an opportunity through \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.whocaresscotland.org\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Who Cares? Scotland\u003C\u002Fa> to apply to attend Harvard University for a summer camp. Within 30 minutes she had filled out the application form; and she won her place! I was so proud of her to have the confidence to go for it and to go to America. She is now a nurse in an A&E department.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I don’t like to think of what could have happened to the children if we hadn’t fostered them. Over my years I have had newborn babies straight from the maternity, I have had older ones, I have had teenage mothers; I’ve fostered mothers and their babies. So, a lot of the kids I looked after would have went into a residential unit if we hadn’t taken them in. Or a lot of my teenagers would have went into a secure unit. If they had went there, they wouldn’t have had the support to change the path they were on.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>Anyone Can Be A Foster Carer\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>To anyone thinking about becoming a foster carer, I would say it is the best thing you can do but do not to expect it to be an easy ride or to do it just for the money. It is hard going. If you’re not 100% sure becoming a foster carer is for you then try short-breaks then short term and work your way up. Then that way you aren’t hurting any child if it isn’t for you. The kids we get have been damaged enough, you don’t want to take them on and say this isn’t for me\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>A lot of people think they need to be rich or really clever to be a foster carer. When all they need is a good heart, a sense of humour and a spare bedroom. You don’t need qualifications. Another thing that puts people off is ‘oh, I never had a good upbringing’ or ‘this happened in my life when I was a child.’ But they make the best carers because they can empathise with the kids because they have been there and done it themselves. They can understand. Fostering isn’t just for a certain type of person; anyone can be a foster carer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Could you change a child’s future?\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffostering\"> Contact our fostering team for more information.\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>","2019-05-20T00:00:00.000000Z","Alison's Fostering Story - Aberlour","Thomas and Alison have been foster carers with Aberlour for 12 years. Alison shares their story of why they become foster carers and why others should too.","media\u002FThomas-and-Alison-Andrerson_WEB-300x300-1.jpg","2025-02-19T14:21:50.000000Z",{"id":499,"author_id":19,"slug":500,"is_featured":7,"title":501,"content":502,"content_overview":10,"published_at":503,"seo_title":504,"seo_description":10,"image":505,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":506},49,"natalies-story","Natalie’s Story","\u003Cp>Natalie was first introduced to Aberlour when she was 7 years old, she was unable to stay with her family anymore and she moved to one of our \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fsycamore\u002F\">Aberlour Sycamore houses\u003C\u002Fa>. There she met her mum and dad who \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Ffostering\u002F\">fostered\u003C\u002Fa> her when she was 16 years old. Find out from Natalie about how her mum and dad changed her life for the better and how others should become \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Ffoster-care\u002F\">foster carers\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>My Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>When I was 7 years old Aberlour saved my life. I had suffered trauma at the hands of my biological family and my teachers at school reported it for me to be taken into care. I then went to live at an Aberlour Sycamore house.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I lived in the Sycamore house until my first foster placement. Sadly, that didn’t work out and I had to be placed in an emergency foster placement until a place became available in Sycamore again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My mum and dad were residential workers at Sycamore. It was because of me they decided to become foster carers. I was 16 years old when they fostered me. It wasn’t easy when I first joined their family. Mum and dad had children from previous relationships and then had their own baby at the time I joined. There was a lot of clashing between me and two of my sisters as we were similar in age. But mum and dad never gave up.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I didn’t know what love was, I didn’t know how to trust.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I didn’t know what love was, I didn’t know how to trust. I was a nightmare when I first moved in. I really tested them to their limit to see if they would send me back to the residential unit like the last family. I put them through everything and anything, called them all the names under the sun but they never gave up. Every day I would hear the word love. Eventually I started to realise ‘well if they keep saying it to me, they must mean it.’ I wasn’t a horrible and nasty child, but I did make it hard on mum and dad to make sure they were tough enough to take on a challenging child. They proved to be. They showed me I could trust them and they both showed me what love was, from both sides which I had never had before.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Mum and dad’s biggest asset is to talk. As a family we always talk things through. They always gave me space when I needed it, for example when I was struggling, I used to put my hood up; even mum knew when my hood was up to leave me alone. But I always knew they were there for me to talk when I was ready. I think it is really important for a foster carer to let their child know that they can have their space but that they are there to talk to when the child needs it. They are more likely to come and chat then.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Mum and dad also spoke to my sisters and brother about why I acted the way I did sometimes; that was really important too. My family understand me and never, even when my sisters and I would fight like sisters do, did they once say ‘you don’t belong here, you are in care.’ We are so close. I have never been this close to anyone. We are a family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Being moved into a family out of the residential unit was life-changing for me. I was able to live a normal life.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Being moved into a family out of the residential unit was life-changing for me. I was able to live a normal life. You can’t have that in a residential unit as there were so many people coming in and out my life. I didn’t like advertising I was in care. At school everyone just thought mum and dad were my mum and dad. I was able to make friends. I used to think I couldn’t do that because I was in care. I was able to have a normal, stable life. Mum and dad had hopes and dreams for me. They encouraged me to get my first job at 16, to have a life and to plan for the future.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Mum and dad are always there for me. I haven’t gotten to a certain age and they stopped helping me. I was under an agreement with social work until I was 22. So, it isn’t like when I turned 22 they said ‘oh right bye’ as the contract is over. I am a part of their family, and I always will be. I have a family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I moved out when I was 21. I needed my own independence and to stand on my own two feet but with my mum and dad’s support if I need it. I can move back but I have just turned 30 and I haven’t had to yet.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>If mum and dad hadn’t fostered me I would have gone down a destructive path.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>If mum and dad hadn’t fostered me I would have went down a destructive path. I had a brief spell of it. I would have been worse off if I didn’t leave. I was 15 when me and all my friends were all out drinking and getting into trouble with the Police as we liked a chase. The minute I turned 16 I would have probably been hit with every charge going because I would say ‘you can’t do nothing as I am 15, it will come off my record.’ I was so mouthy and cheeky it was unreal. But by moving in with my family I managed to keep myself and my record clean.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am really excited as two of my sisters are having a joint wedding this summer and I am going to be a bridesmaid. This will be my second time as a bridesmaid. My first time was bridesmaid to my mum as her and dad didn’t get married until I was living with them for a few years.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I want to help those kids the way mum, dad and Aberlour have helped me.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I am finishing up with college, but I know that I want to progress a career in working with kids in care. I want to help those kids the way mum, dad and Aberlour have helped me. Nicola, from Aberlour, is helping me apply for a job with a local project in Aberdeen which is all about nurturing relationships in the care system.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I am also working with Nicola on joining the fostering panel. As a child, I had to attend a lot of panels. It will be good for me to see the work and process that someone goes through to become a foster carer. With my experience I hope I will be able to help the right people to become foster carers.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I want people to know that becoming a foster carer is one of the most rewarding jobs you could ever do.\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>I want people who are thinking about becoming a foster carer to know that it is one of the most rewarding jobs you could ever do. To open up your home and to give a child a start in life. Because if you don’t, the child won’t get it. Everyone deserves a chance to have a good life and have a family as well. It isn’t good for a child to feel abandoned; it is a rewarding and worthwhile job.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Can you change a future and become a foster carer? \u003Ca href=\"\u002Ffoster-care\">Find out more today\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-05-15T00:00:00.000000Z","Natalie's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FNatalie_Story_john-mark-smith-719971-unsplash_WEB2.jpg","2024-11-25T08:28:24.000000Z",{"id":508,"author_id":19,"slug":509,"is_featured":7,"title":510,"content":511,"content_overview":10,"published_at":512,"seo_title":513,"seo_description":10,"image":514,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":305,"updated_at":506},50,"caitlins-story","Caitlin’s Story","\u003Cp>Perinatal mental ill health affects almost one in three mothers and one in ten fathers, and is one of the leading causes of death for mothers during pregnancy and the year after birth. Caitlin shares her experience and explains how \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fperinatalbefriending\u002F\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Aberlour’s Perinatal Befriending Support\u003C\u002Fa> Service has helped to save her life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>My Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>Throughout my pregnancy I had been quite ill. Then a few days before Harrison was born he stopped moving. I was rushed into hospital to check everything was ok. I was then induced the next day, but I was constantly being sick. I then went into labour the next day for 24 hours. It was really horrible: I hadn’t eaten or drank anything for three days. As I was panicking it was putting Harrison under distress, his heart rate kept going up and down. It was a horrible experience that went on for so long. I do think this is where the bonding problem I felt I had with my new, beautiful, baby boy started. I resented him a little for putting me through all that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I was diagnosed with post-natal depression\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Not long after Harrison was born, I was diagnosed with post-natal depression. Nothing helped. I didn’t want to get up off the sofa, I didn’t want to get changed or brush my teeth never mind do things with my little boy. I felt like that bond wasn’t there and he was better off without me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>My health visitor suggested I go away for a few days and see how I feel. My friend and I went to Spain for 7 days. The first few days I was loving it: I had no baby, I was care free. But then it hit me: I missed my wee boy. I wanted to go home and be his mum. I am glad I went away as it made me realise the bond I didn’t think was there, actually was. But then I felt worse.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When I got home, I just didn’t know what to do. I hit rock bottom, I felt like I was a terrible mum. I felt like I was letting Harrison down as I wasn’t helping him thrive, to be the best person he could be, to be the best thing in my life. I thought Harrison doesn’t need me, he is better off without me. That then escalated to ‘no-one needs me in their life’. I was so low, and I was having suicidal thoughts.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>When Harrison was 6 months old, I knew I had to do something. I needed help. That is when I was introduced to Angie at Aberlour. Nothing else I had tried worked, I knew this was my last chance and it worked!\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>I met Claire and I started to be me again\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>Aberlour provide a perinatal befriending service, so I met with Angie a few times to discuss how I was feeling and the help I needed. She then matched me up with Claire, someone who had been through a similar experience, someone who understood what I was going through. Slowly but surely things started to change and I started to come back.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At first Claire would come around to my house. I would sit in the corner of my sofa cooried in. I would make a cup of tea for us both, while Claire would keep an eye on Harrison. We could then talk about me, my concerns and my feelings. Claire would listen and as she had been in a similar situation to me, she would never judge.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>On our third visit I asked Claire to come along to local mummy and baby class with me. I wanted to start meeting other mums and let Harrison play with other children. Having her there made me feel confident. I knew if I couldn’t cope, she was there for me to fall back on, someone I could ask to keep an eye on Harrison while I gathered myself together again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>It really is the small things that help. Claire was there to get me out the house to do activities that we love to do together, like arts and crafts or going for a coffee just the two of us. My homework task each night was to get into bed and reflect on the good things that happened that day. Some days these were small things like ‘today I managed to get dressed’ or ‘today I took Harrison to nursery and then to the park on my own.’ I kept a diary of all these things, and it is unreal to see my journey on paper.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>Focus on the positives\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>One of the most important parts of having my Aberlour befriender is that fact Claire listens to all my concerns and understands what I am going through. She would never tell me what to think or do, but she would show me the positives in a situation, not just the negatives which I was focusing on.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>At the end of our meetings I felt great, I would see that the positives outweighed the negatives. This helps me so much even now because there are still ups and downs, and the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Faberlours-top-ten-tips-to-improve-your-perinatal-mental-health\u002F\">Aberlour Top 10 Tips\u003C\u002Fa> are always in my house when I need them.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Without Claire and Aberlour I wouldn’t be sitting here today and that is the truth. Which isn’t nice to admit but it is, and the connection I have with my little boy now is the best thing. I am so proud of my journey; I am now off my anti-depressants and back to my bubbly self. I am thriving and so is Harrison. I am strong and know I can handle anything that comes my way thanks to the positive way I now think and feel.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>The perinatal befriending service saved my life\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp>This befriending service is a must; this service saves lives. It saved my life. But It isn’t just for the mums it is for the children as well. If you have a mum who feels they can’t look after their child then you are going to have children that aren’t going to thrive or be the best they can be because they need that support from their parents, and some parents need support to be the best parents they can be for their children. The service is needed as if I didn’t have the support from Claire and the Aberlour team my son wouldn’t have a mum right now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-05-01T00:00:00.000000Z","Caitlin's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FCaitlin-Crop2.png",{"id":516,"author_id":19,"slug":517,"is_featured":7,"title":518,"content":519,"content_overview":10,"published_at":520,"seo_title":521,"seo_description":10,"image":522,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":506},51,"chelseas-story","Chelsea’s Story","\u003Cp>23 year old Chelsea has been supported by the \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-family-support-service-glasgow\u002F\">Aberlour Family Support Service – Glasgow\u003C\u002Fa> team since she was in school. Find out from her how Johnny and her support workers have helped her to be proud of her life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>My Story\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“I didn’t have the best upbringing. I lived with my Nana and Grandad as my parents weren’t around anymore. I was getting into trouble and my Nana and Grandad couldn’t deal with me. They were going to put me in a home because I was so badly behaved.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“There was nothing they could do to stop me. I was suspended every week from school for fighting or hitting teachers and then I was involved in gang fighting on the streets of Glasgow. That is where I met Johnny from Aberlour, 12 years ago.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Aberlour really helped to turn my life around\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“When I met Johnny, he really turned my life around. Right now, I would probably be in jail if it wasn’t for him taking me off the street and taking a lot of people I know off the street. Helping us with our education and other important stuff. It is hard to describe how much he has changed my life, but he has changed it for the better.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Johnny encouraged my friends and I off the streets by giving us stuff to do. We played football, took part in 5k runs and he would take us away on day trips. He arranged activities so that we weren’t stuck on the streets, so we weren’t getting involved with violent acts, and doing stuff we shouldn’t be doing.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“He and Julie then took us away on residential trips to Loch Lomond and Iona. We would take part in team activities like raft building and camping, which really brought you out of your comfort zone. We learned lots of different skills which we never would have done before. We had to take turns at doing the dishes and cooking food for everyone. It was great to meet different people from all different areas and backgrounds.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Providing support throughout my life\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“Johnny has been there throughout everything in my life, always someone to talk to if I need to. He introduced me to peer mentoring, where I was training to be a mentor not only to my friends but to the younger kids that were coming in. It was all about spending time with each other, listening and them knowing that what they were telling me was confidential. But, I was learning what was important enough to tell Johnny so he could help them. I could speak to them because I knew what it was like to be on the streets, about real life and how it could change if they got off the street.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I really wouldn’t be where I am now without Johnny and Aberlour. He helped me get my first job at Impact Arts. I really loved working there as I was working with the elderly and I got to talk and interact with them. I am proud of all the volunteer work I have done not only for Aberlour but also the British Heart Foundation, which I wouldn’t have gotten involved with if it wasn’t for Johnny. Completing all the volunteering hours really helped me to get jobs, helped me to learn about helping young people and helping myself develop.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Even now, with my own kids Aberlour support me\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“I’m 23 now, and Johnny and Chloe from Aberlour still help and support me when I need them. I have kids of my own now and they both are there to talk to and make things a bit easier.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Chloe has been helping me with my housing as there is water coming into the house and damaging all our things. It isn’t good for the kids immune systems, breathing that in and there are also maggots coming into the house. Chloe has been coming to the housing with me and speaking with the MSP to get it fixed.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“She also helped get \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Furgentassistancefund\u002F\">funding\u003C\u002Fa> to replace the kids clothes, my clothes, the washing machine and carpets that have all been damaged by the water.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Then at Christmas I was struggling and Aberlour brought loads of toys to my house, there were so many toys. Christmas was hard. Feeling like you aren’t doing good enough, I know my kids don’t understand as they are so young, but you feel hurt that you’re not giving them what you think you should be giving them, so it was great what Aberlour brought to me.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Johnny has also helped me when he realised, I was dyslexic. He helped me to get support, because I didn’t know how to read or write, and I am learning now. It is a big support that they have helped me with that and now I can read my children bedtime stories.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I believe if it wasn’t for Johnny and Aberlour I would have gone the wrong way, but instead I went the good way. I could have thought well my Mum didn’t care, my Dad didn’t want to bother with me, which people do but I didn’t. That is what I was doing before Johnny, I just didn’t care about myself, I didn’t care about others around me and what I was doing to hurt other people. When now I wouldn’t want my kids to be like that. I am just glad I was able to change my life. Everyone comments on how different I am now; how different I am from when I was in school when I was still going off the rails. When I met Johnny and I had a club to go to that is when it changed.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Honestly without Johnny and Aberlour, I do think I would be in jail. Or because my Nana couldn’t have coped, I would have been in a home and I would’ve had a different kind of experience. I wouldn’t have had my kids and they are the best thing that has ever happened to me.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>my life is good\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>“When I was younger, I was like look at me I have had a hard life. Now I know there are people out there with a life worse than me, they are in a worse state than me. When now I feel my life is good, my house might not be good with everything that is going on, but my life is good. I have been a success as a mother, as I am getting help. My kids will see what I have done with my life, because of Aberlour, they will see the volunteering I have done and want to go do it and help young people. I can show them that I can support them through the changes in their life.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“If you are looking to support a charity then definitely support Aberlour as it helps people like me, who need support to get them off the streets. I know there are a lot of young people hanging about the streets and they are not getting the support they need; they feel like they have no purpose. Aberlour would help them like they helped me, get them jobs and help them do better in themselves. There are a lot of people Johnny and Aberlour have worked with to turn their life around. But there are more young people who need help.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>To help support young people like Chelsea, \u003Cstrong>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fdonate\u002F\">donate now>>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-04-19T00:00:00.000000Z","Chelsea's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FChelsea.jpg","2024-07-25T09:39:56.000000Z",{"id":525,"author_id":19,"slug":526,"is_featured":7,"title":527,"content":528,"content_overview":10,"published_at":529,"seo_title":530,"seo_description":531,"image":532,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":533},52,"katies-story","Katie’s Story","\u003Cp>Aberlour Sustain services aim to keep families together where possible and appropriate, preventing children being placed unnecessarily into care. We listen to families and respond to what they need, when they need it. Families have told us they feel Aberlour is on their side, not on their back.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch1>Early help vital in keeping families together\u003C\u002Fh1>\n\u003Cp>Crises in families often don’t happen between nine and five, nor can they wait until Monday morning. With \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fsustain-ross-shire\u002F\">Aberlour Sustain\u003C\u002Fa>, we can support the whole family when and where they need it most, seven days a week. Support can often include help with setting routines in the morning, helping families get children up, dressed and into school; and in the evenings where again, routines, homework and behaviour start to put a strain on families.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>Aberlour Sustain\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp>We piloted our first Sustain service in \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Fsustain-ross-shire\u002F\">Invergordon\u003C\u002Fa>, Highlands in 2016 and worked with 14 families whose children were at risk of being taken into care. We succeeded in keeping 11 of those families together –\u003Cstrong> a 79% success rate\u003C\u002Fstrong>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>One such family is Katie’s. She lives with her 10 year-old son Fergus and 6 year-old daughter Chelsea.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My son Fergus has autism and ADHD and so his behaviour can be challenging” she describes. “I suffer from fibromyalgia and depression. Before Aberlour Sustain started to help me, I struggled daily with the children and could not see the light at the end of the tunnel.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Sustain started helping my family in December and has changed my life for the better. The support we receive as a family is unbelievable. I have never felt so happy with someone coming into the home to help my family. Both my children enjoy seeing their worker Sharon and so do I.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Our success in Invergordon has meant that we have now launched two more Sustain services in \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-sustain-borders\u002F\">The Borders\u003C\u002Fa> and in \u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Faberlour-sustain-perth-and-kinross\u002F\">Perth and Kinross\u003C\u002Fa>. And it’s only through support from funders and donors that we can make this difference for families. Support at the earliest stage, before damage is done and families are torn apart, is at the heart of what Aberlour does; we’re delighted that our innovative new Sustain services are having such a positive effect for so many children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"http:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fpublication\u002Faberlour-news-spring-2019\u002F\">\u003Cimg loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-6758\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fcontent\u002Fuploads\u002F2019\u002F04\u002FAberlour-News-button.jpg\" alt=\"Aberlour News\" width=\"144\" height=\"60\" \u002F>\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-04-16T00:00:00.000000Z","Katie's Story - Aberlour","Early support is vital for keeping families together. Read Katie's story to find out how the Aberlour Sustain service has supported her family.","media\u002FKatie.jpg","2025-01-21T17:49:59.000000Z",{"id":535,"author_id":19,"slug":536,"is_featured":7,"title":537,"content":538,"content_overview":10,"published_at":539,"seo_title":540,"seo_description":541,"image":542,"story_type_id":75,"created_at":523,"updated_at":543},53,"lyndas-fostering-story","Lynda’s Fostering Story","\u003Cp>Meet Lynda. She and her husband Joe have been foster parents to Dylan*, their “loveable rogue” for three years now with Aberlour. Here Lynda describes the highs and lows of the incredible journey of fostering, urging others to do the same to meet a real need.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>“We wanted to help… what better way than fostering?”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My husband Joe was adopted when he was four having lived in a children’s home before that” describes Lynda. “Right from the start of our relationship, Joe had made it very clear that he’d like to have his own family but also to help another child in the way that he was helped. We’d also done our research and realised how many kids needed help and were stuck in the system and don’t get their chance. We wanted to help and what better way could we do that than foster?\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was really impressed with what Joe’s foster parents had done for him so for us it was about waiting until our own two kids were at a stage when they were ready to handle it and they’ve been amazing.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch3>\u003Cstrong>The Fostering Process\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh3>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Dylan had been taken into care at the age of five following some very difficult experiences. Approaching his ninth birthday, he was introduced to Lynda and Joe.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The assessment and matching process for us was very quick” says Lynda”. “As part of it, we’d made up a scrap book for Dylan for his social worker to show him who we were, pictures of our dogs and the things we liked to do as a family.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Kerryanne from \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Ffostering\">Aberlour Fostering\u003C\u002Fa> took our sons out for an ice cream, got to know them and very informally asked the relevant questions about how they felt about fostering. The kids were never fearful or worried about it actually – they were very accepting of it all and quite matter of fact about it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“But we have had to make adaptations as a family. We knew that going into things. Outside the home, no one would know Dylan has any needs really. He plays well with the kids in the street and he’s in mainstream primary school right now along with my youngest son Calum. Going to the same school as Calum has worked a treat – he’s never missed a day at school except for illness.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s inside the home that’s difficult – he doesn’t cope well with rules and everyday routines. He can be very angry and his outbursts can be quite extreme. We were worried how far he might go at points. But we’ve had a lot of really good support. He’s currently undergoing some mental health assessments and we’ve worked to build a structure for Dylan and for our other two sons. They’ve come along way.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Ch2>\u003Cstrong>aberlour’s excellent fostering support network\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fh2>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“What made us decide to foster was the support package that Aberlour provides and the reassurance that you’re not doing it all yourself. They provide a lot of initial and ongoing training to help you find those strategies of helping your child. You get to meet other carers and learn from them too as to what they find helpful.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The support network is excellent: you can phone at any time and if you need someone to come out to the house, they will. For Dylan, knowing Aberlour is there in the background is also really helpful and encouraging to him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“One weekend a month we use Aberlour’s short break respite service. We didn’t want to use respite care at first but we discovered that whilst we coped well, our boys needed a break from time to time. We discovered actually that respite was helpful – it helped Dylan knowing he could have a break and a change of scene, as well as providing a break for us too.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Asked what Lynda would say to someone considering fostering, she said unflinchingly “If you’ve got an empty room, then please use it! I would just wish more people would come forward to foster.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s been such a rewarding thing to do. It’s very tiring. It’s the hardest job I’ve ever had to do but so rewarding as you see so many little changes take place and you can say, ‘I’ve helped with that’.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>*Real name changed to protect anonymity.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fhelp-us\u002Ffostering\">Find out more about becoming a foster carer today.\u003C\u002Fa>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n","2019-04-11T00:00:00.000000Z","Lynda's Fostering Story - Aberlour","Lynda describes the highs and lows of the incredible journey of fostering, urging others to do the same. Can you become a foster carer with Aberlour?","media\u002FFosterLynda2-300x300-1.jpg","2025-02-19T14:25:15.000000Z",{"id":545,"author_id":19,"slug":546,"is_featured":7,"title":547,"content":548,"content_overview":10,"published_at":549,"seo_title":550,"seo_description":551,"image":552,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":506},54,"marthasstory","Martha’s Story","\u003Cp>Martha is a 21 year old student who works part-time and who was looking to boost her experience by volunteering with children. She began her befriending role with  Aberlour Outreach – Dundee at the end of 2016:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was looking for a different experience and the befriending role really appealed to me. It felt a bit more personal to get to know a child one-to-one. It was something I was passionate about through my course so it fitted with my interests and studies.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>In her volunteering, Martha began befriending a 10-year old girl:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I remember right at the beginning, we made a list of the things she would like to do. I like to include her interests in the activities, she’s quite involved in picking what we do. She’s very passionate about animals so we go to Monifieth Pet Shop – there’s a parrot there that dances! She’s also very arty so we keep a scrap book of the adventures we go on and colour it in. She calls it the bubble-book because she puts bubbles on everything. It’s nice for her to have something to keep and look over.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I enjoy the relationship I have with my befriendee, it’s so nice to be able to see a child develop. I’ve been in her life for a long time now so I can really see it. The experience of working with her has made me more confident in working with children – seeing a child develop is incredibly rewarding.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Martha has also developed a great relationship with the rest of the family:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I am now very aware that the befriending is not just for the child’s benefit, but for her mum too. It is nice for her mum to have a wee while every week that is structured and time for herself. I’ve built up a good relationship with her brother too, I look forward to seeing them all.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I would really recommend others to consider volunteering, the environment of Aberlour is very friendly and welcoming. Aberlour is a very organised charity and is the perfect combination of very structured and organised, whist being incredibly accommodating to students. I’ve been really grateful for this as I can get stressed around exam time. I enjoy that you can try different roles, and the training and support kept my interest. I’ve made friends with other volunteers and I feel that I can approach any member of staff.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-06-01T00:00:00.000000Z","Martha's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Celebrating our volunteers for Volunteer Week Scotland 2018","media\u002FMartha.jpg",{"id":554,"author_id":19,"slug":555,"is_featured":7,"title":556,"content":557,"content_overview":10,"published_at":558,"seo_title":559,"seo_description":10,"image":560,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":506},55,"lees-story","Lee’s Story","\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Lee’s Background\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee has autism and a mild learning disability. He has been receiving support from \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservices\u002Foptions-dundee\u002F\">Aberlour Options Dundee\u003C\u002Fa> since October 2012. This support has focused on a variety of things including social skills and self-confidence. As part of this support, Lee was given the opportunity to attended the first Aberlour Youth conference in 2016.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee and 50 other young people from Aberlour services across Scotland spent a weekend away doing workshops, and outward-bound activities. After YouthCon ’16, Lee reported that although he had enjoyed some parts of it, he felt some of it was ‘too childish’ and that he felt there were ways that it could be improved.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong> \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cstrong>Lee’s Journey \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee produced a graphic about what he felt could be done to improve the conference for other young people.  He was invited to be part of the young people’s planning committee for the next YouthCon’17.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Other young people on the committee were based in Moray so Lee had to learn to use Skype from Dundee. He learned to use the software quickly, and said of the group:\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Although it was hard at first because I didn’t know the other young people, everyone was really nice and I quickly felt more confident. The best bit of being a part of the planning group was having my ideas listened to and hearing other young people’s great ideas.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee’s biggest concern with the overnight conference was the time that young people were asked to be in bed. Lee was a night owl and thought that having no bedtime or a much later bedtime would make the conference more enjoyable.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Despite conversations with staff, Lee didn’t recognise that this would not be practical or possible. When this topic came up with the planning group Lee was able to compromise and agreed to an 11:30pm bed time. Lee said afterwards that hearing that the other young people also did not think it was a good idea made him realise that it wouldn’t work.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee was very excited when it was time for the YouthCon’17 and met with the other young people attending from Dundee to tell them a bit more about it. Lee told staff he felt more confident attending the conference this year as he already knew lots of other young people from the planning group.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>As part of the planning group Lee also helped to put together a workshop on internet safety which he presented at the Youth Conference with other young people. Lee was surprised when he did not feel nervous despite there being a big audience and described presenting the workshop as “amazing”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>During the Youth conference Lee also did a welcome speech and was a judge for the ‘Aberlour’s Got Talent’ show. At the end of the Youth conference, a number of other young people approached Lee to thank him for all his hard work and say how much they’d enjoyed his talk and workshop.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Lee’s Future Plans\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lee thoroughly enjoyed helping plan YouthCon’17 and is helping with the planning the Youth Conference in 2018. Lee’s confidence and social skills improved greatly as a result of his involvement. Lee is starting college soon to do a life-skills course and has stated that he is more likely to volunteer for similar planning groups. Lee also plans to make use of his new-found confidence and social skills to attend a local group for young people with autism to make new friends and widen his social circle.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong> \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cstrong>“Helping to plan the Youth Conference has made me feel more focused and confident! Seeing how much the other young people enjoyed the Youth Conference made me feel proud and amazing!”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>– Lee\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>“Lee worked really hard planning for the Youth Conference and it was great to see him gain so many new skills and put these to such excellent use.”\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong> – Lee’s Keyworker\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-05-18T00:00:00.000000Z","Lee's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Flee.jpg",{"id":562,"author_id":19,"slug":563,"is_featured":7,"title":564,"content":565,"content_overview":10,"published_at":566,"seo_title":567,"seo_description":10,"image":568,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},56,"kats-story","Kat’s Story","\u003Cp>“Before I got pregnant, I had a carefree life. I was 35 and married to my husband for nine years, though we’d been together for 18.  My husband works on the oil rigs. He’s away two weeks at a time. Before I had my daughter I would party for the whole 2 weeks while he was away then when he came home I’d pretend I was sensible and do all the housework at the last minute!  I was lucky that I was earning good money and could do what I liked, go where I wanted, buy what I liked. I had a good job in the bank, I’d been there for 19 years. I started when I was 16 and the job meant that I’ve travelled all over.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had a wonderful pregnancy.  We had a waited a long time to get pregnant so when it happened I was so happy. Probably the happiest pregnant person you could meet! Everything was great till 3 weeks before my due date when I was diagnosed as having preeclampsia. I got taken to hospital because my blood pressure was through the roof. The babies heart rate was going up and down. I had to get an emergency C-section. When my daughter she was born, she had pooed inside me and had to be resuscitated. I think a lot of what happened to me stems from that. It was terrifying. She was ok, but when her dad held her she stopped breathing. I couldn’t move as I’d had the section but I could tell that something wasn’t right. She was resuscitated again. There was no lasting damage and she was fine though.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I got transferred to a ward and thought “brilliant, I’ll get out tomorrow”. Then, all of a sudden, everyone ran into my room and it was chaotic, all the machines going off. My first thought was that there was something wrong with my daughter, but it was me they were running in for. I had developed sepsis. My temperature was through the roof. I was treated for that and moved to my own room. I was in hospital for a week. It was traumatic, but I didn’t realise at the time. I was just so happy to have my baby.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When I got out of hospital everything was brilliant. We didn’t have a clue what we were doing, but we were organised and got on with things. A few late nights but that’s normal.  I wanted to breastfeed but It didn’t quite work out. So we did combination feeding and that was fine. Then I started to feel unwell. I didn’t think anything of it. I had a sore head and couldn’t stand for long but at first I thought it was just being a new mum. I’d try to stand up and would just fall over. I went to the doctors and was diagnosed with an over-active thyroid. There were some benefits – I lost all the baby weight in about three weeks! But it also brought on a lot of anxiety, that’s a symptom of it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had no idea how bad my anxiety was at the time. My wee sister would come over to stay and help me when my husband was back at work. We had a ‘next to me’ cot that was right beside the bed.  She offered to sleep with the baby so I could get some rest, but I couldn’t let her – I thought she would steal the baby. I was worse when she was here than If I was on my own. I couldn’t sleep at all for thinking that she would take her away from me. I think it was because we had waited so long for the baby that I was terrified she’d be stolen. My wee sister is the best Aunty you could wish for, but I just couldn’t get it out of my head that she was trying to steal her.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When my friend came over and offered to watch the baby while i had a shower, I had to get out half way through because I thought she was conspiring to steal the baby too. I constantly felt that something bad would happen. My thoughts were irrational. If we went to baby swimming classes I was worried that something would happen to her there as well.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I saw my mum and dad all the time, I didn’t feel isolated. That made it harder for me to understand. I had no reason to be like that. I had a brilliant network and couldn’t understand why I felt like the way I did.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was getting out the house and going to classes with the baby. I made myself go to baby classes. I absolutely hated them. I was paranoid and thought they were cliquey but, to be fair, I think that was in my head. But I forced myself to go. I soon made friends with a group of girls and that made it easier. Once I got to know them, they shared that they were going through the exact same thing. And nobody talks about it. And another friend said to me, “I’ve got really bad anxiety since I’ve had my daughter.” And I said “so do I”. It’s brought us closer together.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I took my daughter to Aberlour’s infant massage group.  My partner also took her to a father and baby infant massage class too. Amanda from Aberlour asked me if my partner had enjoyed the class and my response was “yes, I think they both really enjoyed it but I’ve turned into a bit of a psycho since I’ve had her and I don’t really like leaving her with her daddy.” Amanda didn’t say anything but something had clicked for her in what I’d said. She asked to speak to me at the end of the class.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I thought I had said something mean to someone and she was going to talk to me about it. I overanalyse everything now – before I couldn’t care less. She asked me if I was struggling and that was it, the floodgates opened. It was brilliant though, the best thing that could have happened.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My health visitor was brilliant too. Amanda called her and after that she came around and saw me every week. Amanda suggested that Aberlour’s Perinatal Befriending Support Service might help. At first I had reservations because I didn’t need a befriender. I had plenty of friends. But I went ahead with meeting Angie.  She called me then was out to see me within the week. She was lovely. It was life-changing for me. I was matched with a befriender right away.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The first time she came over we just sat and talked. She came around to the house, but after half an hour I asked her if she would mind leaving it for today. I was overwhelmed talking to someone. But after that everything was brilliant. It got easier with time.  We would go walking come rain or shine on a canal path nearby and just having someone to talk to really helped me. I could talk to my befriender all day, every day. We had loads in common.  It made all the difference to me. I don’t know how, maybe it was because she didn’t know me and would never judge me. She could relate to what I was talking about. It was amazing, the best thing for me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I wasn’t the type of person who gets anxiety or depression. Strangely, it has helped me with my job and empathising with other people. Before I would think ‘they are at it.’ But you don’t know what’s going on with people.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Slowly but surely, I started to feel better. It’s been a long journey. I started to enjoy baby and mum classes more. Now I’m looking at them enthusiastically and thinking about what ones we can do.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’m back at work now. When my partner is home I’m ok, but the day he goes away I don’t sleep as I still sometimes worry that someone is going to steal my baby. It takes me a week or so to get used to it. I’m juggling so much with going back to work. But my boss is amazing. She’s compressed my hours so I work one Saturday in 4 and then when my partner is away I only work 4 days. It makes childcare easier.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The service has given me my life back. I’d recommend it to everyone. My friend didn’t seek help from anyone till her son was 14 months and now she’s in a terrible state. She’s on tablets. I have so many health issues that taking medication for depression is the last thing I would have wanted. I think getting a befriender so early made all the difference. The training the staff must get to spot this, it’s just amazing.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-04-20T00:00:00.000000Z","Kat's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FiStock-544354614-two-women-coffee3.jpg","2024-11-25T08:28:25.000000Z",{"id":571,"author_id":19,"slug":572,"is_featured":7,"title":573,"content":574,"content_overview":10,"published_at":575,"seo_title":576,"seo_description":10,"image":577,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},57,"claires-story","Claire’s Story","\u003Cp>“Before I got pregnant, I was an IT professional with a stressful job. I had always suffered from depression, due to things that had happened in my childhood. I had a nervous breakdown and gave up work. As I started to get better, my partner and I made the decision to have a child. I got pregnant quite quickly. I decided to have the baby before I thought about returning to work.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My pregnancy was quite difficult. I had a few bleeds and was rushed into hospital, and i thought I’d lost him a few times. As a result, I felt constantly terrified. My mum bought me a pregnancy diary and I didn’t write one word in it. I thought that if I put pen to paper that I would lose him and I didn’t want to document anything just in case. I was scared right up until I saw him. But he was perfect when he was born and arrived on his due date.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was discharged from the hospital after 4 days. But I ended up with a womb infection and had to return within 24 hours, with a fever and blood clots. I was in and out for 3 weeks. It was a stressful time. On top of this, my relationship with my partner was starting to break down. I started to feel very isolated.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My baby was fantastic though. Once we got home, I was happy, in a little bubble. But then, all of a sudden, every day became the same. You find yourself in a routine of looking after your baby, up day and night, trying to sleep. I started to feel suffocated and I didn’t have any time for myself.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My family were as supportive as they could be. But people tend to let you down. I didn’t tell them how I was really feeling.  I didn’t feel like I had any control of the situation I was in. My life was dictated by the baby. He was breastfed exclusively and hungry every 10 minutes. I wasn’t allowed to do anything and I just felt trapped. I had been on anti-depressants but had to cut down on them through the pregnancy. When you’ve had depression and anxiety, you are more susceptible to post-natal depression I think. I felt low, very low. Like I didn’t know how I was going to go on. I didn’t think I could cope any longer. And lonely, so incredibly lonely. I was so lost.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was worried that people would think I was a bad mum or that social work would take my baby away from me. There were times where I just wanted to escape. But when you have a baby, you have to stay at home. I had to look after the baby. I wanted to look after him but I also just really wanted to get away.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had built up a trusting relationship with my health visitor and when my baby was four months old, she started to see me go downhill when I made the decision to leave my partner. She was supportive and suggested that the Aberlour Perinatal Befriending Service might help me. I wasn’t sure it was going to help but I thought I may as well try it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When I first met Catherine from the service, I’d already tried mindfulness apps, medication, counselling… I thought “how can a fake friendship help with somebody I didn’t know help me?” But I just thought “I’ll try anything here, anything and everything”. Catherine said “I know who you are going to get paired with, I’ve got the perfect person.” So I got matched pretty quickly, no time to think about it or panic!\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My first meeting with my befriender was like an awkward first date. We made small talk and it felt a bit weird. But she was nice, and asked me questions so I quickly thought, “ok, I can hang out with you”. We talked about books and films and she was good with my son. Over time, I built up trust in her.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It took a bit of time for me to really open up. I wouldn’t go deep about how I felt or tell her the darkest thoughts. Once we’d seen each other for about a month, I started to feel really comfortable. If I had a bit of a blip, I could tell her “things haven’t been going so well this week”. When I approached her with what was going wrong, she responded in a way that made me want to open up more. There were times when she arrived and I was in tears, and I was laughing by the time she left.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Mostly she came over to the house, but a few times we went for walks. Or she took the baby for a walk and gave me a chance to sort things out.  I was in a lot of debt and my finances had got on top of me. I had a list of phone calls to make and the baby was being noisy. Having Sarah there meant I could get some peace and quiet.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“There was one time when there were baby grows all over the place and I was feeling overwhelmed. She helped me lay them out and organise them into piles. It was good fun and just having someone to help and chat to while I was doing it was nice.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Another time, I was interested in a group that met up to talk about baby weening and real nappies and I wanted to go, but I had never had the courage to go by myself. So my befriender came along with me for the first meeting, then I was able to go on my own after that. I went to Hartbeeps with the baby, and breastfeeding group there were like-minded mums there. We went swimming sometimes too. When I had down days I wouldn’t go out, but I was trying as much as possible, as I wanted my son to interact with other babies.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It was all about him. I thought, “how can I make him more comfortable, happy, socialised?” Having Sarah come around was a reminder that I had to think about myself.  I had totally forgotten about looking after myself. I wasn’t showering, or brushing my hair, or making any effort whatsoever. Now I’ll put my make up on and do stuff for myself. That’s all just come from my befriending.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I gradually started to feel better. It was little steps. Sarah would encourage me. She would help me get little parts organised. She stopped me from going “what am I’m going to do with all this” She would say, “right this week why not try to sort this one thing or that one thing?” I was getting so much done, and things were falling into place.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“For me, the regularity was important. I could feel myself falling back into the black hole, but knowing she was coming within a few days stopped me falling in too deep. She would bring me back up, bring me out of it, and make me see the positives. As I’ve come closer to the end of the befriending, I’ve learned the tools to deal with this myself. I can feel myself going downhill, but I’m strong enough to pull myself out of it. It’s all about confidence.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Having a befriender also had a massive effect on my son. Sarah commented that she could see a big difference in him – since I had started becoming more confident it just seems to be rubbing off on him. It’s been fantastic, it’s had a great effect on us both.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I don’t think I would be alive if it wasn’t for Aberlour’s Perinatal Befriending service. My son is 13 months now and I’m thinking about going back to work. I’ve just signed up to be a befriender with Aberlour. That will get me out of the house and give me confidence before go back to work. I’ve got my last meeting with Sarah soon and I’ve realised there’s a lot I can give back. Hearing other women’s experiences with depression and anxiety touched me and I thought “I need to be part of this”.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I think the befriending service is amazing. You don’t feel alone. You’re taken out of that loneliness, it’s like someone is holding your hand. It’s unbelievable – I’ve done counselling and all kinds of different things and nothing has had as positive an impact on me as this.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had a bad day a few days ago, when my son saw a stranger and thought he was his daddy. My son doesn’t see my ex-partner very often, so he doesn’t really know him. It cut deep. I could see it affecting my son as he was cuddling this man. It was the father of another toddler at the group, and he gave him a cuddle back, which my son was clearly needing. It made me feel so low. That night I put my son to bed, sat up for an hour and thought to myself, “I’m going to have these moments, they are going to happen and to keep my son happy I’m going to have to keep myself happy. To do the best for my son, I have to look after myself, that’s all I can do.” And thanks to Sarah and Aberlour’s Perinatal Befriending Support Service, I know I can do it now.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-04-19T00:00:00.000000Z","Claire's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FiStock-516071104-Pregnant3-scaled.jpg",{"id":579,"author_id":19,"slug":580,"is_featured":7,"title":581,"content":582,"content_overview":10,"published_at":583,"seo_title":584,"seo_description":585,"image":586,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},58,"kashas-story","Kasha’s Story","\u003Cp>“My name is Kasha, I’m 19 and I live in Ribbons.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Ribbons is the name of my flat, which is joined on to Aberlour Options – Moray.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I am in care. I got taken away from my mum when I was little, because she couldn’t look after me. I’ve moved around my whole life, but I’ve been here now for three years. I’ve changed a lot in that time. When I first got here, I was nervous and scared, and if I had to meet a new person, I’d pull my hood up and walk out the room. Now I’ve settled in, I’m more relaxed and I’m starting college.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was born in Falkirk and lived with mum and dad there until I was four or five. Then I went to my gran’s for a while, and then I moved to Fife, to live with Sycamore at Bellyeoman Road. I would have been six then.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I remember my first time arriving at Sycamore. I was scared because I didn’t know what was going to happen. I hid under the table for hours. Over time I got used to it.  I used to memorise where all the creaks were on the stairs and the floor, so I could sneak out of my room during the night and creep downstairs to talk to the staff. We would go on holidays to a caravan and different day trips.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve been to a few different schools. My behaviour wasn’t good. I didn’t listen. It’s not good to keep moving all the time and it made it hard for me in school.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I always loved animals – dogs, rabbits and cats. I had a cat with my foster parents called Baldrick. I had a dog called Rufus with my mum.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When I was 10, I discovered football. I saw Rangers playing football on TV and they became my favourite team. My favourite player is Ricky Foster, but he doesn’t play for them any more. I get a new Rangers top as a present every year and it has my age on the back.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“After I left Sycamore, I went to foster parents and sometimes went for respite breaks, because it was good for me to get a break from them and for them to get a break from me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Then when I was 16, I moved up to Elgin. I got my own flat, which I named Ribbons. I like my flat – I have a double bed. There’s lots of teddy bears on the floor so sometimes it’s messy, but my living room and kitchen are tidy.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“On a normal day, I wake up at 10. Sometimes I get woken up early by my neighbours, which is the children who live next door.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ll do something with the staff. Like me and Stacey will organise my photos and put them on the computer, or I’ll go and play football outside. Sometimes we go swimming or go shopping or to the cinema.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I started doing Park Run and I’ve run a 5k on a Saturday morning. I’ve played for Elgin City Ladies football team. One day I’d love to play for the Glasgow Rangers ladies team.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I picked all my own staff for Ribbons. I’ve picked Stacey, Coleen, Kirsty, Sarah and one bloke which is Adam. Sheena comes and stays when I’m having Chinese chicken curry. When they’re doing interviews, I get to come and ask questions and pick who I like. I’ve decorated my flat with the names of all my favourite staff.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“This sounds harsh, but I like staff who are closer to me in age so I pick younger staff. They take me swimming or out for the day to Inverness or Aberdeen. We’ve been to watch the X Factor tour, and last year we went on holiday to London.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“But I like the older staff too. Frances feels like a mum and Sheena keeps me safe. I like them to come into all my meetings with me because I know they look out for me. I feel safe here and I have lived somewhere before when I didn’t feel safe.  I didn’t feel safe at my grans, but I feel safe here.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My favourite thing about living here is that I get to see Sheena.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“In future, when I’m too old to live here, I’m going to have my own house. I’ll live on my own, but I’ll have staff who come to visit me and make sure I’m ok.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Being in care means you get looked after by staff. They take good care of me here. I wouldn’t change anything about where I live.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“If I was giving advice to staff about looking after children I’d say – you need to look after them but you have to always ask before you touch their stuff, and listen to what they’ve got to say.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-01-19T00:00:00.000000Z","Kasha's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Kasha lived in a residential home before moving into her own flat, which is joined on to Aberlour Options in Moray.","media\u002Fkasha-e1516369086671.jpg",{"id":588,"author_id":19,"slug":589,"is_featured":7,"title":590,"content":591,"content_overview":10,"published_at":592,"seo_title":593,"seo_description":594,"image":595,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},59,"amys-story","Amy’s Story","\u003Cp>The Aberlour Futures – Dumfries and Galloway service was contacted by Amy’s Pupil Support teacher from Stranraer Academy in September 2016. The service supports young people aged 11–18, who are experiencing social, emotional or behavioural difficulties which impact on their education.  The service operates from bases in Dumfries, Annan and Stranraer.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Amy’s Background\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy suffered from anxiety and struggled at school. She was bullied and this led to her school work suffering and her behaviour becoming disruptive in class and at home. Amy lived with her twin sister, her mum and her mum’s partner. Amy was at risk of school exclusion when she was referred to the Futures service.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Amy’s Journey \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy was referred by her school Pupil Support Teacher shortly after she started 4th year as she was experiencing anxiety and panic attacks. The team at Futures worked with Amy on creating coping strategies that would build her confidence. Amy was initially reluctant to engage and was sceptical as to what Futures was and what it could offer her. Kerry, Amy’s Key worker, slowly started to gain Amy’s trust, allowing her time and space to experiment with various activities, and find out what she was good at.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Kerry helped Amy to identify skills and plan goals that would be beneficial for her in the future. She set Amy small challenges to increase her confidence and supported her to make links with Dumfries and Galloway Employability Skills Service and Skills Development Scotland. Kerry accompanied Amy on visits to their premises and supported her to successfully complete an ASDAN PSHE programme. She received a certificate for this which helped her to see that she was capable of achieving academic success.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy was given the opportunity to work in small groups and with a range of adults\u002Fyoung people and staff at the service which helped her to make friends and build positive relationships.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy applied for work experience through Dumfries and Galloway Employability and Skills Service and started a placement working with young children in her local community. Amy also completed an application form for college and coached her in interview skills for the College Advice Session.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Amy’s Future Plans\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy was successful in her application for college and was welcomed onto the Childcare Course at the John Niven Campus in September 2017. In the future, Amy would like to join the Royal Air Force and believes that getting herself back into the frame of mind to study via the childcare course will help her achieve that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Amy said that the Futures service helped her “as it wasn’t like school”, and she is proud of what she has achieved: “This ASDAN is the most work I’ve ever done!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>“The transformation in Amy from when she first started to now has allowed me to see a young girl who was suffering from anxiety grow into a very mature and confident young lady. Amy has overcome a lot of barriers that have allowed her to be a successful learner, achieve qualifications, start a work experience placement and most of all gain confidence and belief in her abilities, and is now able to recognise and be proud of herself.  I myself could not be more proud of Amy and all that she has achieved! I have no doubts that Amy can and will achieve all she sets out to.”\u003C\u002Fem> Kerry, Futures Key Worker\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>“Amy has changed in behaviour and attitude. She is calmer and more happier, myself and Amy are a lot closer, we are back to the way we were. Aberlour and Kerry in particular, I can’t thank them enough for helping Amy, the change in her is brilliant”.\u003C\u002Fem>  Emma Miller (Amy’s Mum)\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cem>“Sincere thanks for your input Kerry; you have been a total saviour for that girl in helping her secure her next steps and I am very grateful for your support.”\u003C\u002Fem>  Pamela Livingstone, Pupil Support Teacher Stranraer Academy\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-01-17T00:00:00.000000Z","Amy's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Amy suffered from anxiety and struggled at school. She was helped by Aberlour's Futures service in Stranraer.","media\u002Famy.jpg",{"id":597,"author_id":19,"slug":598,"is_featured":7,"title":599,"content":600,"content_overview":10,"published_at":601,"seo_title":602,"seo_description":603,"image":604,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},60,"russells-story","Russell’s Story","\u003Cp>Russell was taken into foster care at 11 years old because his family were struggling to look after him. He has complex additional support needs.  He was placed with two foster families, but the placements broke down as he struggled to be away from his family home. Russell then came to Aberlour Options – Ayrshire in January 2011. The Options service normally offers short break care that gives families a rest from their caring role. However, the service fought to give Russell a permanent home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I am about to complete my first year at Ayrshire college where I have been studying a course called Connect to Enterprise. I have already been accepted into my second year; Connect to Learning.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I work at a charity shop. The thing I enjoy most is being given the opportunity to be responsible for myself and show people what I can do and how hard I am willing to work. I love learning new things and if I find something in the shop that I cannot do I am straight in the manager’s ear asking her to teach me. I also love when it comes to the end of the day; finding out how much money we have made as it makes me really happy knowing that this is going to help care for people who need it most.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I went to Scouts since I was about 12 all the way through until my 18th Birthday. I was very sad at the thought of leaving scouts as it has been in my life for so long now so I was delighted when they asked me to apply to become a Cubs leader especially as it has always been a dream of mine to work with young kids and care for them the way my workers cared for me growing up.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I initially wanted to become a volunteer as I wanted some work experience and to build up my CV so that I had a better chance of getting a good job in the future. Now that I have been doing it for a while I find it really enjoyable and love being able to help others.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I hope to stay at college for another few years yet but would like to eventually get out into the world and start earning some money so that I can treat myself a bit more. My dream job would either be to work as a carer or to be an ambulance\u002Fparamedic assistant. I like the idea of being able to work with children who are in the same situation as I was a few years ago and being able to tell them that it will be alright in the end and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel – just look at me!”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Ciframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"500\" height=\"281\" src=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.youtube.com\u002Fembed\u002FkzFMr2F0eNk?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"autoplay; encrypted-media\" allowfullscreen>\u003C\u002Fiframe>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-01-16T00:00:00.000000Z","Russell’s Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Russell has complex additional support needs. After his fostering placement broke down, Aberlour were there to give him a home.","media\u002Frussell-4.jpg",{"id":606,"author_id":19,"slug":607,"is_featured":7,"title":608,"content":609,"content_overview":10,"published_at":610,"seo_title":611,"seo_description":612,"image":613,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},61,"lynnes-story","Lynne’s Story","\u003Cp>Aberlour Family Outreach Dundee helps parents and children who are struggling to cope as a result of drug and alcohol use in the family. We worked with a young mum who became a secret heroin addict, aged 30.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lynne* began taking drugs to cope when her two children’s disruptive behaviour started causing problems at school. It took several years for her son and his young sister to be diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and, in the meantime, she had plunged into addiction.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Lynne said: “It seems crazy looking back, a woman of my age starting to take heroin. At the time, though, it felt like an escape from everything that was going on. I knew my son wasn’t just behaving badly. I knew there was something else going on from when he was wee but I just couldn’t get him help. I was going up the wall. Then my sister died and my grandparents died and I just reached the end of my rope.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Where I lived there were dealers everywhere and I just started taking it. I felt like I was banging my head off the wall trying to get help for my kids. I felt like I was drowning. I was struggling to manage my kids but I never neglected them. They were always washed and dressed and off to school but, in the space of a few months, without anyone knowing, I became a heroin addict. I started going downhill, getting faster all the time.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I got put in touch with the outreach service at Aberlour. They helped my children in school, providing me with support with what ADHD is and how to live with it, and they supported me at home as I fought to get clean of drugs. Finally, finally, I got myself on the straight and narrow but my kids had still not been diagnosed.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I was terrified they were going to be forced to leave school and would never get back into mainstream education. But when they were diagnosed with ADHD, it seemed everything started fitting into place. They’re doing great now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Since my daughter’s been on her medication, it’s like night and day. She’s a different wee person. Aberlour have been great with her. She has a befriender, a student who sees her every week for one to one support. It helps her but helps me too. Because of the stress and the drugs, I had isolated myself, cut myself off from everyone. Just knowing Aberlour was there for me, to call on, like a friend, made a huge difference.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I could talk to them and ask for advice on things that I would find difficult to talk to anyone else about. They encourage me to lead a normal life again and help me take small steps. They’re only small steps but every one is taking me and my kids back to a normal life.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2018-01-15T00:00:00.000000Z","Lynne’s Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Aberlour Family Outreach Dundee helps parents and children who are struggling to cope as a result of drug and alcohol use in the family. We worked with a young mum who became a secret heroin addict, aged 30.","media\u002Fadmin-ajax-e1594390184431.jpg",{"id":615,"author_id":19,"slug":616,"is_featured":7,"title":617,"content":618,"content_overview":10,"published_at":619,"seo_title":620,"seo_description":621,"image":622,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":569},62,"louises-story","Louise’s Story","\u003Cp>Louise experienced depression and anxiety after the birth of her first child and while she was pregnant with her second. She was helped by Aberlour’s \u003Ca href=\"https:\u002F\u002Fwww.aberlour.org.uk\u002Fservice\u002Fintensive-perinatal-support-falkirk\">Perinatal Support Service\u003C\u002Fa>.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong> \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Before I had my two children I was working and enjoying life. My childhood had been difficult but I’m a positive person and was getting on with my life fine and dandy. I was paying my own way, doing my driving and enjoying my motorbikes. I wanted to make a living and get a house.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I met the father of my children and things were great at first. He treated me well and we enjoyed each other’s company. He had been in jail, but I always look for the best in people and I never judge a book by its cover. I ended up moving in with him. It was fine to begin with, then it got extremely bad because he wasn’t getting any money. Everything went nuts. I don’t know how to put it into words.  I ended up losing my job because he didn’t want me to leave him during the day. It went to the extent that he was selling drugs for a while to pay for basics like food and clothes. That went on for 2 and a half years. In that time, I fell pregnant with my eldest. That was a shock to begin with.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I had never wanted to have children. But when I told my partner that, he put a knife to me and told me I better keep the wean. After he put a knife to me, the trust went and everything else with it. I was 21 weeks pregnant when I left him for the first time.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I moved away from him and moved in with my father. Despite the break up, that was a fun time and I enjoyed my pregnancy then. My dad looked after me, got me my meals, he washed my clothes for me, ran me baths. But, stupidly I ended up getting back with my partner and he moved  to be with me and get away from everything he knew. He got a flat and I moved in with him again.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“That was fine till a point, until I was heavily pregnant. I put on 4.5 stone with my first pregnancy.  When I was 36 weeks I was jumping between my dad’s house and his flat, dealing with 2 big dogs, mine and my partners. I was always running around, back and for it, trying to deal with everything myself. I started to feel like I wasn’t me or getting any me-time.  I never got to chill out and enjoy being pregnant like everybody tells you. Then I got my house and my partner moved in with me. I really struggled to get up and down the flights of stairs and that would make me want to stay indoors more as I couldn’t face going up and down.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Having the baby was fine though. She was breastfed fully, so I still didn’t have any time to myself. It was about 8 months before she got to go out with anyone. I enjoyed that time though. My partner was good, he enjoyed being a dad again, starting from scratch. It was nice to see. It wasn’t long before I fell pregnant again with my second child and his fourth.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“That was when things really took a turn for the worse. He got extremely violent. He would push me, throw things at me, shouting and screaming in my face in front of our child. The worst bit was him screaming and shouting so much that the dogs started to fight with each other. He neglected me and our child and with another on the way, I started to think I couldn’t cope.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I heard about the Perinatal Befriending Support Service though a friend at the playgroup. She had had a befriender. I was happy for it; it couldn’t have come at a better time. Angie and Catherine came to visit me. I enjoyed meeting them, especially because they were helping. I got matched with a befriender in 2 weeks. Angie had a friend in mind for the stuff I’m in to so it didn’t take long at all.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My first meeting with my befriender was good. We just clicked. I was still with my partner at that time, and he didn’t make things easy, but he agreed to watch the baby while we went out. Because I was pregnant it was hard for me to get the courage to leave the house. But my befriender encouraged me and drove us out to a local village. We walked around an old castle on the seashore. It was good to just go there and not have a care in the world. I enjoyed it and I’ll never forget it.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My partner was sceptical about me having a befriender at first. He didn’t agree with the law and he was worried that my befriender might see what was going on, all the violence, and say something. My partner was ok eventually because my befriender tried to get to know him, he was part of my life at the time. He encouraged me to go with her more and more because I was starting to get demented in the house.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My befriender would come to the house and then we’d go for a walk, see some historical stuff. That’s what I like to do. A few times we sat in the house, but it was hard to do that with the kid as she had a short attention span so it was better to go out because my daughter was occupied and I could talk to my befriender. We’d just take the dog and the kid out, go to the park, an outdoor farm, out for coffees.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I saw her throughout my second pregnancy. Having her there made me realise a lot. She didn’t have to say anything. Just looking at her face and her body language taught me about boundaries and respect. Until then I was isolated, I didn’t see anybody or get out. I was a first-time mum with two kids in the space of two years; it was a lot.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“If it wasn’t for her I don’t think I’d be here, to be completely honest, I’d be locked up. I was under so much pressure. Having her and her always being positive showed me s me reasons why I might be feeling bad – but she always gave me a reason to feel better, because I was dealing with it. She showed me that I wasn’t giving up and I’ve never given up. She made me realise how I was living. My life shouldn’t be what it was. She never gave me advice but she let me know what being a human was, and it’s not getting locked up and getting hit and getting screamed at. She showed me that another way of life was possible. I’d forgotten what the world could be like and I’m thankful that she showed me. It helped me then and it still does every day. I already knew things weren’t right and she helped me make a change.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I left my partner before my second child was born. He pushed me into the bath when I was heavily pregnant and I thought, enough is enough. I walked out. I went to my dad’s house with the kid and my dog and called his family to tell them to get him out of my house. It took him two days to leave and that was it, he’s never been back in.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Having a befriender has made me become a very strong and wise person. That’s the only way I can describe it. I hope other folk get a befriender too. I’d recommend to everybody. Anybody who is in doubt, anyone who needs a hand. Even help with shopping, my befriender helped me with that a lot once I’d kicked out my partner. I needed someone in my life like my befriender.  If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have the courage I’ve got now. She didn’t just help me, she helped my girls too. And she’s always said I’ve helped her, which was so nice to hear.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My life now is a lot different to how it was before I got involved with the service. I live on my own with the girls. I have PTSD from what I went through. My ex-partner was diagnosed with a serious mental health condition and put on anti-psychotic drugs. He sees the girls once every two weeks now, but he is only interested in the older one. He never formed an attachment with the youngest and I don’t want her getting jealous of the attention that daddy gives her sister. I don’t want him to break the bond that they have so I’ve stopped bending over backwards to accommodate him.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp> \u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The only thing I have now to help me is myself, my achievements. I’ll not be able to work for another 2 years at least ‘till the girls are in primary school. I don’t want to miss anything; I want to cherish them. I’ve had such a doubtful life so far and I want to make theirs better. If mummy’s better, they will be better.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2017-12-05T00:00:00.000000Z","Louise's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","Louise experienced depression and anxiety after the birth of her first child.She was helped by Aberlour’s Perinatal Support Service.","media\u002FiStock-175730782-holding-hands.jpg",{"id":624,"author_id":19,"slug":625,"is_featured":7,"title":626,"content":627,"content_overview":10,"published_at":628,"seo_title":629,"seo_description":630,"image":631,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":632},63,"mias-story","Mia’s Story","\u003Cp>Mia, age 30, was referred to Aberlour Family Support Centre – Langlees, which helps families by building confidence in parents and offering lots of fun for little ones, by her health visitor when she was pregnant with her first child. The centre offers Early Learning and Child Care sessions for children aged 18 months to 3 years to support very young children’s overall development and help parents with their own mental health and attachment issues.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The centre offers parenting sessions which help boost mum and dad’s self-esteem, offering advice on subjects such as child development and classes including infant massage.  This boosts confidence in new parents and has health benefits for babies. Mia took part in infant massage and child care sessions with all three of her children.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Mia’s\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cstrong> Background\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Me and my partner have three kids, aged two, three and nine. Neither of us work due to mental ill health. I found out about Aberlour 9 years ago when I had my first child. I was introduced to the service by my health professional and I’ve used the family centre for 9 years now.  Aberlour has been the biggest help because I haven’t had any family support. They have taken the children from me for a few hours a couple of times a week which has been a great help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My children absolutely love it at the Family Centre. My two-year-old had separation anxiety, she was only 1 when she started and the staff brought her on really well. Now when she gets here she has a wee petted lip but then just goes away and plays. She loves it here. Me and my partner thought the nine-year-old wasn’t getting the attention she deserved because we had our hands full with the two younger ones. The centre worked with my daughter at her school.  That brought her on leaps and bounds. Now she gets pupil of the year awards which I’m very proud of.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong>Mia’s Journey \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My partner is a recovering addict. He’s been clean for 10 years, but my family didn’t approve of him when we met, and they still don’t give me any support right now. It’s hard. I don’t work because I have depression and my partner is the same. We have three kids so we’ve had to make sacrifices to make ends meet. It’s hard to pay for food and electricity, our electricity is £80 per fortnight. When you’ve got three kids to clothe and feed it is expensive. We’ve used foodbanks. It’s quite degrading having to go to them, it affects you a lot. You feel a failure as a parent using these services but needs must.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve felt that people look down their nose at me for asking for help. People making digs on social media saying people shouldn’t have kids if they can’t look after them. That’s not the case at all:  some people sail through life but some people hit poverty and don’t get a break. My kids are my world.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>What worries me about the stigma is if it affects the kids when they get older. The media puts it into their head that life is like a fairy-tale and the reality is that it really isn’t. They are set up for disappointment from day one when they grow up and it isn’t fair.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve struggled to pay for things day to day. When the kids were younger they didn’t ask for much, I could get away with getting them cheap clothes from ASDA. But now they are older they want more and more expensive stuff, £35 trainers and hoodies. That’s when the pressure really comes on, as you feel like a failure as a parent not getting them this stuff. But you have to make sacrifices so they get food and that. I received donated clothes from the service for my younger children.  When mine are finished with them I had them back in for other people to benefit.   I’ve also had support from Aberlour through the ‘Cash for Beds’ appeal.  I found out late on that I was expecting my 3rd child and wasn’t prepared.  My youngest was still in a cot bed and the cot was needed for my new baby.  The service got me a brand new bed for my son.  It was amazing\u003Cstrong>.\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“For me, a good day is when my partner helps and he’s not moping about the house with his anxiety and depression. A bad day is when he doesn’t help and I have everything to do, get breakfast, kids ready for school, take them to clubs then bathe them and get them ready for bed. I hate Tuesdays, I don’t get in the house till 8pm. I’ve got so much to do. The kids are all screaming at me shouting “Mum, Mum, Mum”! This service has helped so much, I get a breather from the kids as they are here for a few hours and I can get things done like cleaning and tidying and going to pay bills.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“It’s not bothered me using the service, because I’ve enjoyed meeting people, there are a lot of nice people and it’s been great for the kids, they are happy and settled.  The worst thing for me was not having family support. I’ve suffered anxiety and depression because of that. But Aberlour have taken the pressure off, taking the kids for a couple of hours. You always end up with one in the house but it still gives you a bit of you time.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“The cuts have really affected me and my family. For example, nine years ago there was a scheme called ‘trust fund’. Now you don’t get it. It was money there to set them up for the future, but that’s been cut so now you don’t get that. So one of my kids has that, but the others don’t. Education is really important to parents. Every parent wants the best for the children, my children are my world. But now I feel bad because one has that but the other two haven’t. I don’t think that scheme should have been cut.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>\u003Cstrong> \u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003Cstrong>Mia’s Future Plans\u003C\u002Fstrong>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I’ve got one year left with the service with my youngest, and I want to give back. I don’t have money, but I help them any way I can. I was involved in choosing a new member of staff, and I felt really important, it was nice to have that opportunity because you get to pick who works with your children, it was fantastic. The staff in here are amazing, so friendly, easy to get on with. I think everyone should give back, it would make the services even better. Some people just dump their kids in but I’m not like that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“If it wasn’t for the service I don’t know what I’d do. I couldn’t survive without it.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2017-10-16T00:00:00.000000Z","Mia's Story","Mia, age 30, was referred to Aberlour Family Support Centre – Langlees, which helps families by building confidence in parents.","media\u002FCharlenes-story.jpg","2024-11-25T08:28:26.000000Z",{"id":634,"author_id":19,"slug":635,"is_featured":7,"title":636,"content":637,"content_overview":10,"published_at":638,"seo_title":639,"seo_description":10,"image":640,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":632},64,"alanas-story","Alana’s story","\u003Cp>“I went through a lot as a child. From when I was 6 until I was 9, I was taking care of my mum. Then my dad left in quite a brutal way. None of my school peers could understand what I was going through. I was a young carer. I had to wash my own clothes and do my own hair. My hair never, ever got cut. I felt completely alone.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I thought it would be a good idea to get an older family member to come home to help me, but they brought their friends into the house and I was abused. I had my childhood stolen from me. When I was 11, I was injected with heroin and I was raped.  Then, they made me take it every day. After a while, I started to grab whatever I could get my hands on because my brain just couldn’t actually cope with what had happened.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“After that, I went from foster family to foster family, children’s home to children’s home. I was only a child. No child deserves to go through what I went through. I carried on using drugs until I was 25.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“I started coming to Aberlour Family Service when my daughter was 3 months old. I had been clean for several years before she was born, and she was born totally healthy and normal. I thought coming to Aberlour Family Service, would be a great idea, because it would help me to get out of the house, and it would be a good way to get extra support.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When you use drugs, you are totally numb to everything around you. So when you come off drugs, you can’t handle normal things. Some former drug users find it hard to do normal human interaction, or can’t look you in the eye. For some it’s because their confidence is so low, for others it’s simply because they’ve been numb for so long, they don’t know how to do normal any more.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“One of the hardest things about coming off drugs, is encountering ‘normal people problems’. Things like paying your bills. Simple things that everyone has to do. But these are things a drug user might never have done. That’s where Aberlour Family Service was a great help.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Coming here to the groups helped me get better at things like cooking, learning to budget, not wasting my money. When you use drugs, the attitude is more about living for the moment and you can easily blow all your week’s money in one day, but now I need to budget and plan and save. Coming here to groups helped me to learn that.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Coming here also helped me to start listening to my body again, something else that I had ignored when I was using. Eating when I’m hungry, taking care of myself when I’m unwell.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“You’ll never get out of the hole that you are in, if no-one is there to help you. People deserve a bit of compassion and understanding because you never know what someone has been through in their life.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“Today I’m paying off debts from when I was using. Today I do normal people stuff. I go to work, pay my bills, go to appointments. I have patience for people. I handle things maturely. Today I live in a house where I paid for everything and I have receipts for everything, and that feels great.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“My daughter is very bright. She’s into maths and art. She’s very good at art. She likes singing and dancing. She’s decided what bike she’s going to have when she’s older. She’s adamant she is going work with animals. She loves animals but they don’t always love her.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>“When I look to the future, I just want to stay healthy and happy and keep being a good mum to her. She never saw me upset or struggling. She’s got a stable mum. She is very happy.”\u003C\u002Fp>\n","2017-01-11T00:00:00.000000Z","Alana's story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FDependency-Alana-stock-scaled.jpg",{"id":642,"author_id":19,"slug":643,"is_featured":7,"title":644,"content":645,"content_overview":10,"published_at":638,"seo_title":646,"seo_description":10,"image":647,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":632},65,"charlenes-story","Charlene’s story","\u003Cp>I remember the day that I left my mum’s. I was at my nursery and social work came in and said we were going away. I went into foster care. Then when I was 12, I came to live in Sycamore. I was shy. I just did my own thing. But once I got to know the staff I came out my shell. I could always talk to them. I felt happy and safe there.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I stayed in Sycamore until I was 18. It was the longest time I spent anywhere. It was a family. Someone was always there. They were easy to talk to, although I never really talked about the things that happened to me when I was younger. They are still helping me with that now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The staff at Sycamore taught me how to cook. Every Friday me and the cook would go through the menu for the next week, and we’d decide what we were going to have for dinner and pudding each night. I enjoyed Sycamore really. It was a happy time.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>The best days were New Year’s Day. Every year we’d all go on the minibus and have a barbecue on Elie beach. It might have been cold but we loved it. Christmases were good too. We got up at 6 o’clock. All of us would run down to the living room and the staff would come in sometimes with the camera or video. I’ve still got my first Christmas present that I ever got at Sycamore. It was a ghetto blaster. The tape decks are broken now and the CD player is broken now but the radio still works.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Now, I see Katrina from the aftercare team at Sycamore, once a week. We usually go out for a coffee or a meal and have a wee chat about the things that are on my brain. She’s easy to talk to. I don’t like talking about those things that happened to me when I was younger, I keep those things to myself. She’s helping me get some counselling now, to help me deal with it. I have a son of my own now.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>Sometimes I wonder about where I would be if I hadn’t gone to Sycamore, and I know for a fact that I would be in the jail. I know this because some of the people I was playing with when I was young are in jail. So are some of my family. But I’ve never been in any trouble.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp>I think I am a good mum and I’m happy. When I look to the future, I just want to make a good life for my son.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Charlene's story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002FL3O1988-scaled.jpg",{"id":649,"author_id":19,"slug":650,"is_featured":7,"title":651,"content":652,"content_overview":10,"published_at":638,"seo_title":653,"seo_description":10,"image":654,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":632},66,"kates-story","Kate’s story","\u003Cp>I ended up going to Aberlour Youthpoint – Moray, when I was 13. I was having problems at school. I was being bullied and I had a really big drinking problem. I had behavioural problems you could say. I was like a firecracker. I physically could not speak to anyone unless I had a drink in me. I had a lot of dependency on drink at that time, when I was 13.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">I was a very angry individual towards the majority of my family. I have a very complicated family and we had a lot of problems. I developed a dependency on drink because it was the only way I could cope. I started drinking when I was 8. I would steal it. I would say I did not have a childhood.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">I was so unhappy. I was getting negative input at school and negative input at home, and so I would escape and drink. For me there was no other escape. It was hectic and horrible at school. It was horrible at home.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">Eventually I was referred to Aberlour Youthpoint by the school. When I got here for the first time, I had a tantrum. I didn’t want to walk round the building and look round, I just wanted to sit in the kitchen alone. I’d had a really bad day. I was very stubborn.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">Since coming here, I’ve met Anne and she has helped me a lot. Anne got me to stop drinking, because I could never come here if I’d had a drink. It’s one of the rules. I tried it once and she said it was unacceptable. It really upset me because I wanted to come here. It was my only escape and it was the only nice place I had. I couldn’t have coped with what was going on in my life if I didn’t have Youthpoint.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">I am a different person now, from who I was when I was 13. Back then, I didn’t have anyone. I was totally alone. I thought everyone was out to get me. But now I think \u003Ci>‘OK I didn’t have it easy, but there’s probably other people who’ve had it worse than me.’\u003C\u002Fi>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">If it wasn’t for Aberlour Youthpoint, I wouldn’t have an education. If I had carried on the way I was going, I would have done so much damage to my body. I’ve had my stomach pumped 4 times. I’ve hurt myself in so many different ways, and I’ve hurt the ones around me. If it wasn’t for this place I would be dead. Or I’d be in prison. I was not a very nice person before.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">Aberlour Youthpoint is a great environment. There’s no judgement here and that’s so important. I was so paranoid before about people judging me and thinking I was horrible. I don’t feel like that now, I don’t care about it. People can think what they want but here at Youthpoint, they just accept you for who you are and they help you to deal with the issues you have.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">Now when I look to the future, I know what I want to do. I want to get into an apprenticeship in some kind of manual trade job, and if that fails I will join the army. I have also trained as a volunteer with Youthpoint, so I can be a peer mentor for other young people. I want to do that because if it wasn’t for this place, I’d be dead. I just hope they like me. For me, Anne was like magic, and I’d like to help someone the way she helped me.\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">I have changed so much. I still feel like the world isn’t a great place but thanks to Youthpoint, I realise it’s not as bad as it could be.\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Kate's story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fdreamstime_xxl_34373963.jpg",{"id":656,"author_id":19,"slug":657,"is_featured":7,"title":658,"content":659,"content_overview":10,"published_at":638,"seo_title":660,"seo_description":10,"image":661,"story_type_id":57,"created_at":523,"updated_at":632},67,"annas-story","Anna’s Story","\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">When my daughter Anna was diagnosed with autism, I was heartbroken. Life is tough enough without adding extra challenges. She started coming to Aberlour Options in January 2014. When she’s not having her respite break, a normal day for us is chaos.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">Anna demands so much of my attention. She has to be kept on task because she’s like a little butterfly and she’ll just flit off. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">You’re like a hamster in a wheel. It’s constant. You’ve always got to make sure you’re hyper-alert the way she is, because you’ve got to pre determine what she’s going to do next. She can have periods when she is incredibly challenging. She has hit me but you have to realise it’s a form of communication. It’s not because she doesn’t like me, it’s because she’s frustrated.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">She’s not great with sleeping. Some nights she’ll sleep the whole night and other nights she’ll maybe go for 3 or 4 hours. You survive on coffee the next day. When she’s up, she’ll be up and down the stairs, up and down the stairs all night – getting into everything. She’ll appear in the bedroom at 6am looking for juice, or she’ll play music at 5am. She has no awareness of what my needs are or what her brothers’ needs are. \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">When Anna goes to Aberlour Options, it just takes the weight off for a little bit of time. It’s the simple things. We have to live in a house that’s like Fort Knox otherwise she just escapes and runs away, so just being able to have a door open is a luxury. We can even go out for a meal which is something we can’t do with Anna, because she couldn’t cope sensory-wise in a restaurant. There’s too many inputs coming at her.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">Anna’s happy at Aberlour Options and she needs that continuity. She needs people who get her and there’s two staff members in particular that get her to a tee. I know by her reactions to them and the photographs I see in her scrap book. The staff at Aberlour Options are worth their weight in gold.\u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n\u003Cp class=\"western\">“T\u003Cspan style=\"font-size: medium;\">his is a vital service for families. When you have a child with complex needs, the respite break is the chance to recharge your batteries. You get to a stage when you’re running on empty and that’s no good for any relationships, especially when you have other children. This service is vital for families, there’s no other way to put it.” \u003C\u002Fspan>\u003C\u002Fp>\n","Anna's Story - Aberlour - Web Backend","media\u002Fservice-earlyyears.jpg"]