Jen's Volunteer Befriender Story

‘It might be a swim, a chat or a walk in the park’

"It’s all about the mums, what they want, what they think might help. There was one who really wanted to go swimming because that was something she enjoyed before her baby arrived.

"So I would bob around in the baby pool with the little one while her mum did some lengths.

"I’ve been a perinatal befriender since 2019, helping new mums who have been referred to Aberlour because they might need some extra support.

"I’ll do whatever is going to help make things a little easier for them. I’m there to help, to allow her to take a breath and decide for herself how things can work.

"It’s about listening, not judging and giving women space to talk about whatever is on their mind.

"I have always had an interest in the welfare of children and enjoy being around babies and children. When I’m not volunteering, I work mainly in primary schools, introducing children to mindfulness to help with their emotional and mental wellbeing. It is so important to support children in this way.

"It’s a two-way thing and I get so much from the mums I meet. The training of volunteers is terrific. It is a privilege to be alongside women and their little ones.

"We are told that we are not there to “fix things” but to listen, provide a bit of space for the mums to offload and then work out what they need to do for themselves. We are often working with quite vulnerable women and building trust is important but so is the relationship between the befrienders and our co-ordinator. It’s all built on trust, good training and knowing support is there if needed.

"It’s so important to get the early years right when the babies are tiny, and that ripples right through into adulthood.

"It baffles me why there isn’t more investment in early childhood. It seems like such a no-brainer when children are our future."

Jen La Trobe, Volunteer Perinatal Befriender

Find out more about becoming an Abelour Perinatal Befriender.